Tesseract Child
by Bright Anarchy
Summary: The Justice League has no choice but to sacrifice Robin to close the Tesseract when it opens an unstable dimensional portal between worlds. De-aged and damaged what will the Avengers make of him and will he ever get home?
1. Meeting Robin

Thor was being dragged along by two big guys with machine guns strapped to their backs. He was out cold.

Captain America was slung over someone's back he watched blearily waiting for whatever it was he'd been shot with, to work it's way out of his system. It felt hard to breath and the best he could manage was the occasional finger twitch. Everything felt tingly and the walls were swirling. He supposed he should feel concerned or angry or something about being captured but right now it kind of made him want to giggle. He was trying to count how many men were escorting them but he couldn't remember what number came after squirrel. _One,.. two, tree, squirrel, eight, nuts?_

They were dragged into a large workroom and secured spread eagle with a huge metal restraint system with complex looking electronic locks. Captain America wondered if the small child, unconscious and strapped in leather restraints to a worktable was in fact there or if it was like the melting walls. Once the guards left and they were alone for a while, the Captain closed his eyes and drifted away for a bit.

"Captain!" bellowed Thor authoritatively.

"Yeah, I'm awake!" Captain America started opening his eyes with a gasp then wiggling his fingers and toes just to prove he could. He tested the bonds focusing all of his strength but nothing even budged. The child was still there but the walls weren't melting anymore.

"What are these foolish mortals going to do the youngling?" Thor sounded concerned, and angry.

"I can see he's breathing but why is he unconscious? Has anyone been here?"

"I know not. I have been indisposed."

Their voices woke the little one. He looked over. "Hello," chirped a small voice. The boy looked maybe four or five. He had messy onyx hair that stuck up everywhere at odd angles, a slightly tan complexion but that was really all they could make out from where they were.

"Hello," replied Captain America keeping his voice gentled.

Thor inclined his head in a slight nod of acknowledgement but that was the limit of his ability to move and he wasn't sure what to make of the boy.

"I'm Robin. Pleased, to meet you. Are you here to shut down that monster of a machine too? It really has caused enough damage. Just a minute, I won't be but a few moments," Robin carefully dislocated his thumb on his off hand wriggling and working with the straps it took a few minutes but then he had a hand free. He repositioned his thumb joint and undid his other bindings. He slipped off the table pulling the sheet with him and wrapping it around him.

"It's cold in here and for some reason I have no clothes… probably the rapid resizing issue." Robin explained chatting in a determinedly cheerful manner. "Come on then, let's get you free. The enemy of my enemy is my friend and all that." He tottered over to Thor unsteadily then climbed up to examine the electronics securing him. "Okay, I've got this. I just need, um…" He scrambled down wobbled unsteadily over to a small pile of equipment on the far side of the room. He took a few things apart and dragged back some circuit boards and wires.

Captain America and Thor watched him in silence although the little guy was not really silent long enough for them to get a word in edgewise anyway.

"They probably didn't know what to make of me and thought leather restraints were enough. Do you know who they are? Do you know why they were trying to open a portal? Is it common in this world, just open dimensional portals and wreck havoc? Why even bother? Oh man…" The little guy staggered and stopped to lean against a wall. "Not really feeling the aster right now."

"Are you okay?" asked Captain America.

"No, not really but let's get things sorted first. I figure I already stabilized the time distortion they had that thing sending off, so I should be able to set it to send me home then after a few seconds delay, blow it up but I've got to find what they did with my C4. I guess it's not really my C4 but well, the explosives I was given to destroy that thing. I wonder if that's why they kept me,… because I fixed their toy and they wanted to know how? It's not really like they gave me a choice! Do you know how many live were lost because of their portal thingy? It's completely not cool."

He hooked a make shift mess of circuit boards and wires to Thor's restraints then padded over to Captain America climbed up and got to work there. Thor noted that his restraints were now clicking.

"You're pupils are uneven," the Captain stated staring at two very blue, very young eyes, thinking of the staggering wobbly way the child walked and looking over to Thor. Both adults thought concussion. The child needed immediate medical attention.

"It's not a sign of concussion," Robin denied as if interpreting the Captains thoughts from body language alone. " ...but yeah there's definitely brain damage. I'm missing information, I was unconscious for, I don't know how long, I've got a killer headache and I can't seem to stop talking. Two Martians trying to shove bits of my brain back together as fast as I was loosing my marbles probably did that. Well… we had to do whatever it took to stop it, the portal that is. It was going to kill everyone.

I'm a small price to pay to prevent apocalypse. Dad's gonna be mad though. Uncle Clark was supposed to be babysitting me to stop me from rushing headlong into trouble not. Well,… Dad's gonna accuse him of encouraging it,… trouble that is.

I hope Uncle Clark's not crying. I'm okay, sort of. Just a little younger, missing a few memories and well… pretty far from home.

I've got to stop saying 'well' so much..." Robin paled as he realized he was using his Robin persona and he had referred to Superman as Uncle Clark. It was weird to be Robin without a mask but his new extreme youth was easily as effective a disguise as a slight change in hairdo and a mask. He was having a lot of trouble paying attention to what he was saying and doing. His thoughts felt like a freshly wobbled bowl of jello.

"You are a small price to pay to prevent apocalypse?" Thor boomed incredulously.

Robin continued to prattle on unfazed by Thors loud outraged response. "Blue Beetle wasn't available and they needed a hacker, a really good hacker who was experienced with extraterrestrial tech. The Magicians and the Green Lanterns were trying to contain the time distortion and portal energy. They had to put me inside the, you know, containment zone so I could hack the technology and shut the gate down.

The time distortion was reversing time inside the containment zone so to go in there and still know what I needed to do, the Martians grabbed hold of as much of my mind as they could, you know, psychic-like and kept my consciousness on a feedback loop so I'd know what to do to stop the machine.

Batman will be mad about that too! The Martians know like everything now, really! They know every Bat secret, every embarrassing or personal moment. They know it all now. That kinda wigs me out, but you know, get traught or get dead. I don't think I'll ever be able to look at Megan again. …you know.

Argh! Now I'm doing it with, 'you know'! Come on brain, keep it together."

"So you used to be an adult and were turned into a child by a time distortion created by the gate?" Captain America tried to clarify. The child was rambling quickly from topic to topic. Was Thor following what the child was explaining?

"I'm thirteen, or I will be in a few weeks. Well, I used to be," Robin answered looking a little confused.

"That's still a child," protested Thor trying to wrap his head around what he was being told. "There was no more qualified adult available?"

"Nope!" bragged Robin a little cocky and grinning. "I'm awesome!" He sent two thumbs up in the Viking's direction. The clicking on Thor's restraints stopped and they popped open. Robin kept working on the Captain's restraints which a few moments later popped open as well.

8888888888

(Okay I need a second opinion. Is this making sense so far?)


	2. Guarding Giants

_Because every 5 year old thinks superhero is a fun game and because grownups can't really help it. Protecting children from both physical and psychological trauma is a biological imperative._

Thor once released, stormed to the door raised back his fist.

"Wait!" Robin piped up.

Thor looked back at the little boy in disbelief, "You freed us. Is this not where we do our part?"

"Well, that's going to make a lot of noise. Have you tried it yet, to see if it's even locked?" Robin padded quickly and silently up to the door. He pressed an ear to it then reached up and tried the knob. The door was open. He silently shushed the two big warriors then peaked outside.

Captain America rubbed a hand over his eyes in embarrassment; then nodded for Thor to follow after the child.

"Psst, Robin, it's the other way," the Captain corrected in sotto voce.

Robin looked back at the smaller of the two warriors with guileless questioning eyes. "The generator is to the left. Look up. There are more terminated power lines on the far side. The generator was, like, um right beside the portal machine or were you, you know, looking to retrieve gear?" Robin was bouncing slightly on the balls of his feet with the effort it took to stay mostly silent. They were in unsecured territory he had to shut up. He didn't want to shut up. If they could just start moving, moving would be just as good as talking.

Thor looked at the Captain with an eyebrow raised. With the Avengers, everyone had agreed the Captain was the leader.

Captain America sighed in defeat and went the way Robin had originally indicated. Robin kept running a few steps ahead then looking back quietly and bouncing on the balls of his feet waiting for the two soldiers to catch up. All of a sudden in a flash Robin darted around the corner, the bed sheet fluttering to the ground behind him. There were two heavy thuds. Captain America and Thor ran round the corner recognizing the sounds of combat.

Robin sat on the ground with his head in his hands, butt naked beside two fully grown armed soldiers, both of whom were sprawled out unconscious. "N..Nn..Not whelming. Ouchy, ouchy…" He was rocking slightly holding his head.

Thor picked up the bed sheet and passed it back to the child.

"Thank you," Robin chirped quietly still holding his head. Once he'd tied his bed sheet back round himself, he passed Thor a security card from one of the guards. Robin tried to stand and fell back down shaking.

Captain America picked up Robin in one arm hoping for the bouncy little chatterbox to look a little less broken. "What happened? You went around the corner without us. We didn't see. Are you alright? Are you going to throw up on me?"

"Can I ask you a question?" spoke Robin softly resting his head on the patriotic soldier's shoulder.

"You can always ask. You may not get the answer you were hoping for, but you can always ask," replied the captain, carrying the child away from the soldiers while Thor took over guarding and scouting.

"Can you guys fight and defend yourselves? I mean, don't get me wrong, you look ripped and all but it's not always the same thing. You see, the problem is, I'm not sure I can do that again," Robin admitted weakly gesturing back to the K.O.'d guards. "My head won't tolerate it. Even before I kicked the first guy in the head, the rotation on my handspring had me feeling like I was gonna black out and I don't have enough mass anymore to take them out with punches so I had to spin kick the second guard and there's two of everything now. They didn't even lay a finger on me and I'm not sure how much longer I'm going to be able to stay conscious. I'll keep trying to protect you but I honestly think any more hand to hand combat might kill me. So,… can you fight? I mean really fight… not like, W.W.E.(World Wrestling Entertainment) cause you do kind of look a little like professional wrestlers. I was working on the hypothesis that you could fight based on the efforts they took to restrain you. But, like Batman says, a hypothesis used as a final conclusion is reckless and likely to lead to failure so, can you fight or are you civilians that I need to protect?"

"Shhh," interrupted the captain because the little guy wouldn't shut up even to be given an answer to his own question. "Years ago I was enhanced and trained to be a perfect fighting machine, a super-soldier. The big guy up ahead can easily match me and he can make lightening bolts come crashing down out of the sky on bad guys everywhere. You don't need to fight. Shhh…" The captain looked back at the K.O.'d guards, then looked at the itty-bitty Robin he had balanced on his hip, then examined the walls closely to make sure they weren't still melting.

"Can you please ask the big guy to stop stomping his feet," whispered Robin still, ever so quietly prattling on. "The guards heard us and if we're not going to fight we need to be quiet, stealthy, silent. "

"Can you be quiet?" interrupted the captain asking it as a question, rather than issuing an order.

"Don't know…" honest but bloodshot blue eyes looked at him blearily. Robin did fall silent. After a while his trembling eased and he was able to lift his head and pay attention to where they were going.

The Captain let Thor take the corners and intersections first, so opposition was neutralized before the child even came into range. Thor seemed to be enjoying it. Actually, he seemed to be performing. His battle roars were a little too animated but also a lot quieter than normal. Really, bonking two soldier's heads together, then slamming a third with a showy backhanded fist was not the most efficient way to clear the room.

Robin smiled for him. Thor puffed out his chest.

"How fairs our tiny warrior?" asked Thor coming back to ruffle the child's hair and check with the captain.

"Better, I think you can put me down now," Robin answered. He then pointed up. "Look there."

"What are we looking at?" asked the Captain.

"That's a data line. There should be a computer terminal through that door."

Robin looked between the two soldiers. The Viking one had been mostly silent with the patriotic looking one doing most of the talking. "Sir, if you could keep a lookout," Robin asked of the Viking.

Next he addressed the patriot, "That way I can hack the security system and you Sir, can find out why the base is so empty. There should be more personnel around and because there isn't, it would be good to make sure we're not walking into something messy."

Captain America swallowed a smirk as the kid tried to give them the illusion that the grown ups weren't letting themselves be bossed around by a kid. The problem was that everything the kid "suggested" was exactly what a commanding officer would order. He even seemed to have figured out the Avengers chain of command.

Robin was looking up at him with a happy excited puppy look. Captain America gave as serious a nod as he could and the kid tried the door. It was locked. Thor's pass card didn't open it either.

"Give me a boost please? I can slip through the louver window over the door."

Thor lifted Robin who scrambled through the louver window. The bed sheet got caught on the window frame and slipped free again. Thor frowned and grabbed it for the child passing it back to him when he peeked out of the door at them.

"Kid, I'm getting tired of looking at your bare bum," the captain stated before pushing into the room.

Twelve/Thirteen year old Robin, would have been snarky and a little indignant. At five years old, somebody just said 'bum', Robin giggled like it was the silliest joke ever!

Thor slapped Captain America upside the head not really appreciating the humor and little Robin giggled more, tying his sheet around him, then turning to the computer terminal and typing at a million miles a minute. He was bouncing cheerfully from foot to foot again.

"Okay I found out where everyone is!" Robin whispered. "There's a giant green gummy bear and a red and gold robot attacking the base. They've drawn everyone into the southeast corner of the facility so if we follow this route here, we should encounter minimal resistance."

"The gummy bear and the robot are our allies," the Captain explained.

"Oh and there's a purple Green Arrow coming in from the East," Robin added.

"A purple-green arrow?" Thor asked.

"Sorry, an archer wearing purple," Robin clarified with a happy smile.

Thor wondered which realm this strange Robin child was from. He was from neither Midgard, nor Asgard. He recognized neither Thor God of Thunder, nor Captain America. Robin believed himself a protector of man. What strange place had the Tesseract brought him from where a child would think such a role required of him? A world of man bat's, magician's and Martians? Thor could honestly say he'd never had so insignificant a being take it upon itself to act as his protector before. The world made a little more sense when the captain had held the child cradled to one shoulder. A loose nail in the window frame had scratched a small blood track across the child's back. It made no sense that someone so fragile would ... Thor's thoughts were interrupted.

Thor felt a small hand tugging at him. They were moving out.


	3. Crying Ninja

_Because the inability to open a pudding cup can occasionally reduce even the most mature of 5 year old to tears and the best grown ups can do is try really hard to make everything better._

With a route planned, their progress sped up considerably and in a matter of minutes they were ducked in a storage closet waiting for a large armed contingent to run past. Hiding was definitely out of Thor's normal modus operandi. As the door closed, Thor looked at the small child with them and tried not to glare.

"I do not hide like a sniveling coward!" Thor snapped at Captain America with in a harsh whisper.

"Is it really cowardly to outsmart the enemy?" asked Robin sounding oh so sincere. "Batman always taught me that bravery is about doing what is right even if it is something you don't want to do."

Captain America looked at Robin's blue guileless seeming eyes and then looked over at Thor. This kid was scary smart; that bravery bit was said with an incredibly sincere sounding delivery. Would the God of Thunder catch that the kid was playing him?

Thor looked at the little guy's wide unblinking eyes for several long moments. "No tiny warrior, your man of bats speaks truly."

Nope thought the Captain, thankfully the big guy fell for it.

"I can go back out there if you think it's the right thing to do," offered Robin almost too softly to be heard. "I know your allies are depending on you and I don't want to be the reason someone gets hurt."

Okay, thought Captain America blinking stupidly. Now I can't tell if the kid is playing us anymore.

Robin looked around the storage room and then went to a pair of plungers stored in the cleaning supplies and started unscrewing the wooden sticks from the rubber cups.

"What are you doing?" Captain America demanded in a whisper that came out a little harsher then he'd intended.

Robin looked him straight in the eyes, then whipped the sticks around in a twirling ninja display that ended with the sticks crossed over his head. "Arming myself. Batman won't include escrimna sticks in my kit because he generally disapproves of anything that might encourage me to favor hand-to-hand, over ranged attacks but I'm missing all my kit and my body armor, not to mention nearly a hundred pounds of mass."

"You are not going into battle!" interrupted Captain America determinedly. "Kid, you can barely stand!"

"I won't be defenseless. I refuse! Can you even guess how many times over the last four years I've been kidnapped or tortured, in some creep's attempt to use me against my allies, friends and family? I get it! I get that small and cute, means that I look like a walking dollar sign or the weakest link in a chain of secrets or just a fun way to make the people I care about go completely off the deep-end with grief, anger, distraction and worry but I won't willingly be a party to it. I won't do that to you and I won't do that to myself." Robin was not smiling now. He was red-faced with anger and frustration.

"I think you should let the tiny warrior keep his sticks," offered Thor sounding uncomfortable.

"I want him to hide here," clarified Captain America to Thor angrily. "We'll go secure the base then come back for him. There are too many soldiers now."

When he turned back toward Robin, the child had disappeared.

"I don't think yelling at him was a good idea," offered Thor.

Robin supposed Wally would have said he just went ninja. He knew loosing his temper and taking off had been immature. The problem was he was five with some extra thrown in. Robin stayed in his hiding spot, silent hot tears dripping down his face. He couldn't have even told you exactly what he was upset about. He watched as the two big warriors looked for him. They hadn't introduced themselves yet. Alfred said good manners meant you introduced yourself. In his head he decided to call the Viking, Sven and the patriot could be umm... Jefferson.

I am hiding but I don't think this is what Jefferson meant thought Robin. Robin thought of his mom and dad for a little while, wondering what they would think he should be doing. The memories of his parents were clear. He knew that his mom and dad had died years ago but at the same time, just a few hours ago hadn't they'd been horsing around in the center ring with him. He remembered the grill cheese sandwiches he'd had for lunch. The trailer had run out of propane, so the sammies had only been grilled on one side. Dad had been helping him work on his tumbling. It seemed more real than Batman, Martians and dimensional portals; those memories seemed like crazy dreams. Were his parents really truly gone? If I close my eyes and sleep, will everything be better in the morning wondered Dick?

Robin calmed his breathing and forced himself to use some deductive reasoning. When I was five, I did not know how to use a computer, fight or escape from confinement. When I dream, I don't think I smell sweat, tears and dust. Do I feel pain when I dream? I don't think my head has ever hurt this badly in a dream before. My whole body feels worse then when I had the flu real bad. Doctors put people to sleep for operations. Therefore, in theory, sleep should not contain pain. Batman is real. I have a duty, to do everything in my power to help.

Robin smeared the tears off of his face with a dusty dirty hand, picked up his makeshift escrimna sticks and silently followed after Sven and Jefferson. The two big warriors were like bulls in a china shop plowing through opposition. Even the white bed sheet he was trailing as he followed after them failed to catch their attention.

"We'll just have to shut this place down and find him later!" Captain America shouted to Thor as they slowly fought through the halls to the large warehouse storing the Tesseract portal generator.

Black Window dropped from the ceiling throwing Captain America his shield, then tossing both of the warriors, new communicators.

Thor looked over to Mjolnir. The hammer still sat weighting down and jamming the main activator on the portal generator. Thor decided to leave it there for now.

And then…

"Mr. Robot Sir?" Robin's young voice came over the com-link channel. "If you could take out the second and third bunkers in the west field, the umm, disruptor cannons for lack of a better term, will shut down. You see, they seem to use a modification of the same tech as the portal generator but the cannons aren't self contained they just redirect energy."

"Who the %$# is on the com-link?" demanded Ironman. "Are the Avengers employing chipmunks now?"

"Mr. Robot..." Robin started.

"His name is Robin. Just do what he says!" interrupted Captain America looking around to see where the child was.

"Purple Archer do you copy?" Robin chirped.

"…Yeah?" Hawkeye replied confused.

"The radio towers around the property are powering the smaller disruptor guns, if you target the reflectors at the very top they should be reduced to using ordinary weapons.

Err, Thomas Jefferson go help your green gummy bear please, he's being overpowered."

"Who's Thomas Jefferson?" asked Captain America.

Black Window snickered, "I think he means you."

"Mr. Viking? I could use some help. They're going to break into the control room any minute now."

"How'd he hack the com-link?" demanded Ironman.

"I guess I'm chopped liver," laughed Black Widow who'd not been given a task.

"N, ..um, no pretty lady," stuttered Robin. "You can take out the um, well if you want to keep everyone contained umm, rather than just dispersing the soldiers, um, a low yield explosive on the small propane tank to the left of the air strip will help both stop aircraft launches and probably melt the main access road but I um,…can't remember for sure what the explosive potential of that much propane is."

"You don't need to give me a job kid," Black Widow answered running off. "I'm going to capture the ring leaders. They're more important than the foot soldiers."

"Oh, okay then. That's a good idea."

There was a disrupter explosion from the main control room then Natasha aka Black Widow, saw a very small form in white climb out one of the windows in control tower. It scaled the wall resulting in a white sheet fluttering to the ground. He had what looked like a pair of sticks tucked under his chin.

"Was that a naked kid?" asked an incredulous Black Widow.

"We'll explain later!" Captain America barked over the com-link.

The small form shimmied up the power conduit and out onto the rafters.

"Robin?!", bellowed Thor who'd broken into the control room trying to rescue the child.

"He's out. He's clear!" answered Black Widow. "Look up!" She decided to leave the kid to Thor and continue with her original objective.

Thor looked out the window and up, before ducking back in for a moment to take out a soldier toting one of the smaller disruptor guns. Ugh, it was one of those things that took him out last time. When the room was clear again he looked back out the window and up to the ceiling. A small head looked out over the rafters smiling at him. Robin waved down happily.

Thor groaned then bellowed up, "Friend Robin is sixty feet in the air truly the safest spot?"

A tiny hand reached out past the rafter and gave him the thumbs up. Robin kept crawling out further into the room.

Thor jumped down from the control room landing heavily on the main floor of the warehouse. A soldier targeted him point blank with one of the disruptor guns but it just fizzled.

"I've got the last of the radio towers," reported Hawkeye.

"It succeeded in taking out the disruptor guns," Thor confirmed as he decked a suddenly terrified looking soldier.

"Hulk and I are incoming. Ironman how are those bunkers coming?" asked the Captain.

"I've just about got the one to the left Mr. Jefferson," replied Ironman snickering

"Shut up and fight! Hulk and I will get the other bunker."

The first bunker went up with a near deafening boom. Thor looked up to confirm the shockwave wouldn't dislodge their small friend. In only a few minutes more they had moved on to clean up.

"Friend Robin do you require assistance getting down?" Thor called up when it seemed things were calm. Apparently the child was part monkey as he scrambled down from the rafters effortlessly. Thor handed him his sheet. Robin giggled.

Ironman landed heavily beside Thor. "I'll just vaporize this brute of a Tesseract."

"No!" shouted Robin, Thor and Captain America, but the unibeam from the center of Ironman's chest had already fired out.


	4. Robin Silent

_Because when even when there's nothing to be done it often feels like we should be doing something._

Robin, in fury and grief dropped his sticks and ran to Ironman beating tiny fists uselessly against him. "BAD STUPID ROBOT! You don't listen! Stupid Robot how could you! I hate you! I hate you!"

Tony didn't mean to hurt him, he jerked back and pushed out instinctively, completely not expecting the furious munchkin assault. The Ironman suit didn't really have a gentle mode. Robin flew ten feet across the room and slammed into ground then lay still.

"$^# , I'm sorry," Tony stuttered.

"He wasn't trying to hurt you," protested Thor horrified. "He dropped his sticks. He was just upset."

"I didn't think, I just, there was a flash of movement and …" Tony couldn't stop the stuttering string of explicatives that kept spilling out of his mouth after that. Behind the mask no one could see his expression but they could hear his tone.

Black Widow who dropped down moments later reached up and took her earpiece out turning it off silently and blinking tears out of her eyes. Honestly, her tears weren't for the child but for Tony. No one said another word about it. It was an accident.

Thor walked to Robin and knelt down. He wrapped the now filthy bed sheet more carefully around the unconscious child and picked him up cradling him gently.

"Robin tell Capt'n help Hulk?"

Captain America looked over at the Hulk who seemed to be calming.

"Yeah. He thought you were my awesome green gummy bear friend," replied Steve soft and sad. He didn't feel much like Captain America at the moment.

The Hulk smiled and traced an oversized finger down the child's face.

"Gummy bears nice." Everyone knew the Hulk had a soft spot for small children.

Steve picked up the plunger sticks examining them. They were dented and marked. There was a decent sized chip out of one of them. Bringing them along, the captain followed Thor who was headed to the Avengers jet.

They dropped Robin off at hospital because Bruce who's Hulk rage had cleared comparatively quickly had pointed out they didn't have pediatric medical equipment. When it was explained that Robin would have no identity or medical insurance as he belonged on the other side of the Tesseract, Tony spoke to the hospital. The bills would be taken care of.

The team minus Doctor Banner who had cleaned up and went to the hospital to investigate some of the more unusual contributing factors to the child's injuries sat staring at pizza and waiting for news.

"We didn't really keep up our end of the bargain, did we," spoke Thor.

"What bargain? He didn't seem to free us or do his best to help with any concrete expectation of our aid. He had his own little plan. He was going set the Tesseract to blow up, right after it sent him back to his family. As near as I can tell, all we did was get in the way," protested Steve. "The little hacker ninja just disappeared and ghosted around the bad guys after he ran away."

"Why are his escrimna sticks threaded at the end?" asked Natasha.

"He took them off of a pair of plungers when we were hid out in a store room," explained Steve fiddling with the sticks.

"And the lack of clothes?" she asked.

Tony glared up at her, angry at the universe in general at the moment. "You heard the whole time distortion bit? What kid has the same set of cloths for seven years? Everything he had on him would have deconstructed."

"You lot, need to stop moping," commented Natasha heading off to bed. "And Tony?"

"Yeah?"

"Stay out of the hard liquor."

Tony rested his head against the kitchen table emotionally exhausted. He really didn't want to be responsible for killing some kid.

"Smart kid," commented Clint following after Natasha moments later.

It was 3 in the morning by the time Bruce got back. He looked grim. "He's comatose, on life support and I doubt he'll wake up. He'll probably last a few days, no more. The brain injuries weren't actually the worst of it. The unstable field energy given off by the Tesseract left wholesale damage: organs, bones, everything is slowly deteriorating."

Bruce looked vaguely disgusted about the next bit, "Shield found out about him. They want to document the effects of the portal energy and they're paying to keep him on life support as long as his body holds out, then they want autopsies and such."

"I didn't really care about the money," protested Tony feeling very defensive and totally missing the point Bruce had been trying to make.

Bruce sighed taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes before adding gently, "Tony if he sleeps through his last days as a result of a knock on the head it's probably a kindness. He'd have been in incredible pain."

By morning, which started late with everyone tired and grouchy, Tony had hacked into Shield's newly set up security feed. He had a small window on the computer wall display showing the hospital room. Tony hadn't slept but he had insomniac tendencies at the best of times. He was pretending to be fiddling with some new toy but he kept glancing over at the display.

Natasha came in and slapped Tony's head to get his attention and gestured to the hospital feed, "Comrade, if you think staring at that, is a healthy way to deal with this you are mistaken." She stared at Tony uncertain what to do.

She was still staring in his direction when Thor and Steve came in and rather unhelpfully asked that the display be made full sized.

"It's all very white," protested Steve brokenly. "All that's missing are the restraints. It's like he freed us, then we locked him back in the lab."

Thor wanted to know the purpose of the various tubes wires and machines. Robin could barely be seen under all the equipment.

Bruce explained that they were using the equipment to artificially prolong the child's life to study him.

The ceramic mug of coffee in Thor's hand shattered in a crush and he stormed away darkly.

"Jarvis miniaturize the hospital display!" snapped Natasha sharply.

By noon, no one knew where Thor or Steve had gone.

Steve was at the farmer's market wandering around the antique stalls. He was intimately familiar with being ripped away from everything familiar and to be completely honest he was shuffling through relics from the 1940's and thinking of what is must have been like for the people he'd left behind.

In the late afternoon, Tony saw Steve appear on the hospital security feed. He opened the display to full size. Steve laid out a hand-stitched antique quilt covered in laughing puppy dogs at the end of Robin's bed. He tucked a stuffed bear beside him and a shopping bag was slipped under the bed. Tony tilted his head to the side wondering what was in the bag.

Steve ruffled Robin's hair before leaving with a stone cold nod to someone off screen, probably guards.

"I'm surprised they let him in," muttered Tony.

"Where's Thor," asked Clint at dinner with Natasha the day after next.

"Pouting impressively," answered Natasha nodding to the window where a truly fearsome summer storm was thundering.

Thor stood in the halls of Asgard though it was not somewhere he had intended to return anytime soon.

"Brother!" called Balder jovially completely oblivious to the dark expression on Thor's face. "Come join us at feast!"

Thor followed and sat among long time friends glaring. He grabbed a bunch of grapes and flicked them one at a time at empty wine bottles. Plink, plink, plink… He listened to the prattle of feasts, hunts, bedroom conquests and battles.

"Why so gloomy?" protested a friend surprised that after so long an absence Thor did not join in.

Thor told them of the tiny warrior dying in Midgard.

"Why that is glorious!" Hermod god of speed raised a glass. "Surely he shall walk the halls of Valhalla! Shall we greet him when he comes?"

This was pretty much the reaction of all of the Asgardians.

Thor sighed in frustration, though it was true that Robin was dying having given his life in a heroic rescue of his entire world and that should in theory entitle him to a glorious afterlife, his brethren had not given this as much thought as he had.

"The boy does not belong to Us," Thor tried to explain.

"He aided directly in the affairs of a god when he freed you. One way or another he will surely be welcomed to great glory," insisted another.

"Both his mortal form and spirit are not kin to these worlds. He is from the other side of a portal that stretched beyond any of these nine realms. If the between ways troubled even my brother Loki, what hope does the spirit of a young child have no matter how valiant, in finding it's true home. He will be lost for all time into the ether," protested Thor.

Now Thor had their attention. Not much of the mortal realm truly interested the gods however the lost of a valiant soul to whom a god owed a debt made everyone shuffle uncomfortably.

"You need to see Eir, she presides over both children and healing," Thor's uncle spoke. "She is with Frigg in the gardens but both Eir and Frigg may have requirements of you. They tend to be, particular when it comes to the younglings."

"He does not have a lot of time," answered Thor rising to his feet and departing quickly.

 **Eir - Goddess of Healing, Mercy and Children**

 **Frigg - Goddess of Love, Marriage, Destiny and Childbirth (Wife of Odin)**


	5. Gimme the Kid

Three days later, the Avengers were eating Chinese take out.

"No seriously," insisted Tony whom they'd finally convinced to eat something. "I just like saying moo goo gia pan. Have you ever seen that comedy bit, more moo goo?"

"I don't want to see your moo goo it's gross chew in someone else's face," protested Clint.

Thor strode in with his cape swirling, his helmet extra shiny and a look of authoritative determination on his face. "Avengers Assemble."

"Dude. We're all right here," protested Tony with moo goo noodles hanging out of his mouth.

Steve put his chopsticks down and glanced over at the still miniaturized hospital display. Thor was staring at it. Tony had the display trailing him from room to room much to Natasha's disapproval. Steve wiped his face. "He's still hanging in there," Steve commented. "What have you got for us?"

Thor took out the chain, which hung around his neck. On it hung Mjolnir, his hammer looking for all the world, like a Norse good luck charm and a small crystal vial filled with a milky white liquid. "It is from Eir goddess of healing, help and children. She is handmaiden to Frigg, Queen of Aesir whose bailiwick is marriage, wisdom and motherhood."

"Seriously?" asked Clint sounding dumbfounded. The Asgardian gods gave aid outside of Asgard about as often as people spotted Santa on Christmas Eve. Many people claimed it happened but it seemed to be against some unspoken rule. Thor was the one exception to that rule.

Thor nodded.

Natasha spoke up, "This isn't going to be as easy as slipping into the hospital. Voila, everything is better."

Tony, who'd shoved the food away and gone to get a data pad spoke next. "We'll have a time of it getting him away from Shield. They are likely to ignore any basic rights he aught to have claiming he's an extra-dimensional threat or some such. Just a minute, I'm pulling up everything Shield has on him."

While Tony focused on the computer for the next half hour, the rest of the team came up with a list of what would be required to protect the child properly.

"You realize, even without Shield's interference, the hospital won't release him to anyone but a parent, guardian or C.P.S." explained Bruce.

"We've got to get him here. I don't know if there's anyway to get him home again but Shield's not just going to drop this. There is nowhere else he'll be safe," added Steve.

"I don't think either of you understand," interrupted Thor. "The child belongs to me. He is a warrior clearly devoted to the protection of mankind. This is what I have dominion over. I am his guardian."

Bruce didn't really want to be the one to explain to Thor that the hospital would have a different definition of guardian. Thankfully Steve took that one for him. They spent the rest of the half hour arguing about it until Tony spoke up.

"They've got nothing on the kid except that he was exposed to Tesseract energy. Someone thoroughly hacked the computers at that base. There is no record of Robin, no photographs and no video footage. The hard drives were wiped by a massive virus," spoke Tony incredulous.

"Robin?" asked Clint.

"It's got to have been. So Thor, I'm hearing you want to be a dad?" Tony smirked figuring Thor would scowl and get all frustrated with his interpretation.

Thor sighed trying to be patient with the mortals but angry just the same, "That is exactly what both Eir and Frigg required of me! Odin required it of me in full audience! As long as he is within this realm, I am to be the child's father! I am in his debt." Asgard had been stressful. The situation with the tiny warrior was so unique it inspired the strongly felt opinion of far too many gods!

"Robin didn't ask anything of you," protested Steve. "He helped. I got the impression that's just what he does."

"Exactly!"

"Does the kid get a say in this?" Clint asked Thor.

"No, of course not, mortals don't choose who their parents are, that is the god's domain!" If one more person/god put their two cents in about this Thor was going to loose it.

"Are you going to be angry at him for all time because he put you in this position?" asked Natasha with raised eyebrows.

Thor was grinding his teeth. He'd gone to Asgard. Asgard hadn't come to him.

Tony saved the team from an almighty pounding. "Nope, we can work with this. Okay, I'm changing the hospital records. Thor, when they made records for you, Odinson for the last name right? Okay happy father's day, Robin Odinson just became your son? Hmm, place and date of birth."

"Here and today," insisted Thor. Really were they going to talk about this forever or were they going to save Robin?

"Okay I'll put that he's turning 5 today, close enough, there's no way he could pass for six. Mother… undeclared mortal? Yeah that sounds suitably Thor-ish."

"Clint we need to destroy any DNA evidence," Natasha declared.

"I'll take the airship you take the hospital," offered Clint.

"I'll take on Director Fury," declared Tony. "It's a billionaire business mogul thing. I'll sell the deal with vague half-truths better than anyone else in the room and you know it. This should work to get him legal rights and citizenship with a bit of finagling."

"I guess I'm on medical support," ventured Bruce.

"I'll stick with Thor and Bruce. Let's move out!" finalized Steve.

When they got to the hospital Thor, Steve, Tony and Bruce went to Robin's room in full 'important business get out of our way' mode. It said something about them that the guards just assumed they were supposed to be there with the authoritative way they entered the room.

The guards even co-operated with respectful salutes of "Yes Sir," when Steve ordered they post outside the door and keep everyone out.

Tony immediately disabled the cameras.

"Remove these unholy contraptions," ordered Thor pointing to the equipment connected to Robin. "I want nothing in or out of his body but the elixir."

Bruce disconnected everything leaving the oxygen tube down Robin's throat for last. "Are you ready? Once I take this out there's no turning back."

Thor sat on Robin's bed and lifted the child's small pale form into his lap cradling him gently. He nodded to Bruce who slipped the tube from the child's throat. Robin's chest paused its steady rise and fall.

Thor tilted the child's head back and administered the elixir.

For several long minutes it seemed nothing happened. Bruce monitored Robin's pulse. It continued slow, steady and very weak. All of a sudden Robin started to gasp and cough and cough. He coughed so hard he threw up all over himself, then tired miserable eyes opened and he started to cry.

Thor smiled.

"Can I check him out now and re-attach what I think is necessary?" asked Bruce. He was given a nod.

Bruce re-attached the oximeter to get a pulse and blood oxygen level. Then slipped a simple oxygen mask over the child's head. He still hadn't stopped coughing. "Sit him up please. It will help him clear his lungs."

Robin curled into Thor who held him in a gentle hug. Steve laughed grinning because, to Thor's credit, he didn't even seem to notice that Robin was sweaty, greasy haired and covered in vomit. Thor just looked relieved.

"Okay," declared Tony wiggling his eyebrow mischievously and rubbing his hands together in mock villain mode. "Mr. Fury is in trouble now." Tony strode out of the room with his cocky confidence firmly back in place.

They could hear his boardroom, I'm the man voice, bellowing. "Nick, old buddy, old pal! I've got a bone to pick with you. I think I'd better get you up to date on just how badly you've managed to tick off Thor! You realize, that's his son you're treating like lab rat…" Tony obviously had this well in hand.

It was a while before Robin's coughing eased enough for him to speak. His first words were a pathetic little, "I want Batman."

"I know son," answered Thor soothingly. "Unfortunately, you'll just have to make do with me for now."

Steve squatted down so he was eye level with Robin. "Do you remember who we are? Dr. Banner said you might not."

"You guys never introduced yourselves but I remember you." _Cough, cough, hack, hack…_

"Did we really never? Okay, my name is Steve Rogers. When I'm in uniform most people call me Captain America. The big guy is Thor god of thunder. I think we're just pretty used to people automatically knowing who we are. Dr. Bruce Banner turns into the green gummy bear most people call the Hulk."

Robin smiled up at Dr. Banner his eyes wide and twinkly. "Hulk is awesome. He looks really fun." _Cough, cough, hack,…_

Bruce blinked surprised. Most people were pretty terrified of him.

Robin looked at Thor seeming neither overawed nor in any hurry to pull away from being cuddled. "I've seen a few gods from the Greek tradition but none from the Germanic tradition. I am honored to make your acquaintance and I'm apologize if I," Robin paused for a moment lost for words. "I'm sorry if I don't know .." _Cough, cough, hack,_ "… the traditional polite way to say hi? Err, Princess Diana is going to be so disappointed in me. She lectured me for a day and a half on manners when she thought I might maybe end up in front of one of her gods. That whole lecture is just a blur right now." _Cough, cough…_

"I'm not that easy to offend son," answered Thor.

"Can I take this off," Robin asked Dr. Banner tugging at the oxygen mask annoyed and still coughing.

"Not yet, when your lungs clear a bit more. I'm just going to listen to your chest," Bruce explained, warming his stethoscope.

Nick Fury came barging in followed by Tony. He stopped in surprise when he saw half the Avengers team glaring at him. Steve had jumped to his feet and taken a protective stance. Thor curled himself around the boy who was awake and cuddled up in his lap. Bruce put his stethoscope down and looked at the Shield director warily. The boy stared at him as if assessing a threat.

Nick, who seemed caught off guard by the scene he'd walked into, abruptly change his stance from aggressive to cautiously political. "Thor, you didn't say anything? You just left him at the hospital alone, what were we supposed to think?"

"I did not presume it to be any of your business," answered Thor imperiously. "I left my five year old child sleeping in the care of the best healers available while I went to secure surer aid and returned to this insult!"

"The hospital paperwork said nothing," insisted Fury. "I know for a fact that Mr. Stark adjusted it this afternoon."

Thor just looked at him. At no time ever had Thor had any inclination to lower himself to paperwork. "Mr. Stark indicated the healers would require more complete records before releasing him from their care."

It suddenly occurred to Steve that no one had prepared Robin for his role in all of this and all it would take was a little Robin blurting out something like 'Thor's not my dad, Batman is,' and the whole house of cards would come tumbling down. Thankfully, Robin was coughing too much at the moment to speak.

"Thor perhaps you could take this out in the hall with Directory Fury and Mr. Stark. I'll help Dr. Banner get Robin cleaned up and ready to go home."

Thor passed Robin to Steve. Bruce slipped off the oxygen mask and gestured to the bathroom. "Get him cleaned up quickly and then get him back on oxygen. I'm going down to the dispensary for a portable Ox-tank and an inhaler for later if this doesn't clear up fairly soon. I don't want to give him anything now because I've no idea what was in that other stuff."

Then it was just Steve and Robin.

"You know what would be really nice?" said Robin as Steve set him down in the shower.

"What kid?" asked Steve with a smile pulling off the soiled hospital gown.

"Real clothes. My birthday suit or this joy with pink and blue stripes, throw up stains and ventilation in the rear; it's not really my style." He declared trying for a cheeky grin, before breaking into more pathetic coughing.

"Got it covered," Steve answered quickly washing the boy, wrapping him in a towel taking him back to the bed then pulling the shopping bag out from under the bed.

In the bag were pj's, slippers, "You have branded Underoos?" Robin giggled delighted and coughed as Steve helped him dress.

"I thought you might get a laugh out of that," Steve answered with a smile slipping the oxygen mask back on the child then handing him the stuffed bear. Robin looked down at it then shamelessly cuddled it.

"Here's the deal kid," spoke Steve tucking the puppy quilt around Robin's thin shoulders and ruffling his hair. "Director Fury is head of a government agency called Shield. They are in charge of reacting to special threats against homeland security. They are on the side of good but you seem to have ended up in the unenviable position of lab rat and potential threat. We, my friends and I, are trying to get you out of here. If anyone asks, Thor is your dad, always has been. That gives you someone they can't ignore in your corner and the added bonus of basic human rights, which you might not have otherwise. It also works because Thor tends to be somewhat exempt from things like birth records etcetera."

Steve waited to see if Robin would have any idea what he'd been talking about. An ordinary five year old would not have understood.

"Undercover," spoke Robin. "I can read a little Old Norse but I can't speak it." Robin closed his eyes in concentration for a few moments. "Faðir, I think that's father. That is about my limit." _Cough, cough…_

"Old Norse is not commonly spoken anymore. I like the idea of the Old Norse title for him. It's a good respectful sounding address. Other than that, stick to English. It's a modern world," explained Steve. "For now stay silent."

 _Cough,.._ "Can you tell the red robot I'm sorry I yelled at him? I said some really mean things." _Cough, cough, hiccup, tears…_

And, Robin was back to a 5 year old, instead of 13 going on 30. It was going to take some doing figuring out how to deal with this kid. "You can tell him yourself. His name is Tony Stark. Most people call him Ironman when he's wearing his robot suit. He was in here earlier with Fury trying to convince the director that it's a very good idea to let you go. Kid, we'll talk more when we're in a secure location and when you're feeling better."

Not an hour later they'd pulled it off. Robin was still hooked up to an oxygen mask but Thor had the small tank slung over one shoulder and Robin still bundled in the quilt was balanced on his hip as they strode out of the hospital like they owned the place.

 **Can I get Booyah for Thor?**


	6. Puppy Dog Eyes

_Because kindergarteners are taught to hug and make up._

The fact that Thor looked absolutely nothing like Robin was going to be an issue eventually. They'd strong-armed and fast-talked Shield into releasing the child but everyone knew it wasn't really over.

"Just keep telling them he takes after his mother," Bruce advised as Thor was tucking Robin into a bed in the infirmary at the Tower. Robin was exhausted and could barely keep his eyes open but kept coughing so much he couldn't sleep.

"Do you know if he's supposed to be coughing like this?" asked Bruce.

Thor nodded, "He must clear the miasma from within him. He will be fine." Thor kicked back in a chair next to the child and went to sleep. It had been a long few days.

"Hello, Miss Potts," greeted Bruce the next morning. The quiet greeting woke Robin.

"Tony wanted to see if there was anything Robin would need." Pepper waved hello to the little guy who rubbed his eyes, batted the oxygen mask off and yawned half awake.

"Hi there, anything you'd like?" she asked

"Can I have a juice box please?" Robin asked coughing a little but nothing like the night before. It was a little weird not waking up in his trailer. Robin wondered if it would have even felt weird waking up in the manor or if that would have felt okay just different okay.

Bruce watched the oximeter for a while then turned off the oxygen and the hospital grade monitor and unclipped the meter from the child's finger. "I think we can be done with that annoying thing a last," he explained to Robin who smiled.

Pepper smiled at him. "I'm going to get you some clothes. Can I trace your foot so I've a better chance of getting the right size?"

"Sounds tickly. I'm a size 4T in clothes and I think am a 10 in shoes but maybe 11."

"Shoe sizes vary a lot," encouraged Pepper.

Robin reluctantly slipped a foot out from under his quilt. As his foot was traced, there was quite a bit of giggling and laughing from everyone in the room because Robin got seriously wiggly and it was funny but Thor snored on.

"He's sleeping," whispered Robin grinning. "Shhh!" This only resulted in more giggles.

"You feel up for a trip to the kitchen?" asked Pepper looking at Thor with a little smile. "I think we've got some orange juice in the fridge."

Robin nodded happily. He wrestled his laughing puppy blankey onto Thor, tucking it around the big guy, then hopped out of bed. He skipped to the door, then padded back to Miss Potts who hadn't moved yet, then climbed back onto the bed to get his bear, then climbed down again, then ran back to the door, then stood there bouncing impatiently.

"It's okay?" Pepper checked with Bruce. "I think the little guy's going to explode if he has to stay still another second more." Bruce nodded they could go.

Tony was in the kitchen getting coffee.

"Sastimos, Good morning," chirped Robin in both Romani and English. "You're Mr. Stark right?"

Tony grunted an affirmative into his coffee.

Robin paused his bouncing and went very still. "…sorry for loosing my temper and hitting and saying bad things."

Tony looked down. Robin hugged him quickly around the legs then backed away. Tony spilled his coffee all over himself.

Robin cringed, "…sorry."

Tony looked very awkwardly bemused but Pepper was giving him a look, "I didn't know I was blowing up your way home and I kind of did hit back. Sorry."

Robin nodded very business like. Then as a peace offering added, "I like you're robot colors."

"I got muffins. You want one?" asked Tony sitting down at the table. Pepper refilled his coffee for him.

Robin pulled out a chair and sat opposite. "Okay." Miss Potts gave him juice.

"You two be good," she teased as she left to go shopping.

"I'm always good," Robin protested to Mr. Stark, like saying it would make it true.

"I've never spent a day in trouble in my life," Tony bragged back just as straight faced. They clinked cups and ate their muffins.

"How'd you hack the com-link?" Pepper heard as she left.

"I dunno, just did. Do you ever have people phone you and ask you how to do something on the computer and then listen to yourself saying something completely idiotic like, 'did you try turning it off and then back on?' I just do stuff. I'm rubbish at explaining it."

"Fair enough," accepted Tony. "The doing and the explaining are two different skill sets, and people think I'm idiotic most of the time. I'm not really. I designed the iron man suit all by myself."

"I kinda hacked your suit and uploaded the Tesseract blue prints, back at the warehouse. Thing is, the very first time anyone succeeds in opening a portal out of your universe, it weakens the barriers between worlds so you'll start to get traffic, dangerous traffic. The right people need to understand the technology. As near as I could tell you were the right people. I corrupted any information that would lead back to my universe though."

Tony sat frozen staring at Robin. He wasn't sure what part of what Robin had just said shocked him most: hacked the suit, Tesseract blue prints or dangerous traffic.

"What kind of dangerous traffic?" stuttered Tony.

"Batman told me about one world hit by copies of the worlds greatest heroes turned into super villains. I'm sorry but I don't really know much about boom tubes; that's what devices like your Tesseract are called in my world. It's usually left to the senior heroes because it's world ending dangerous."

"World ending dangerous," repeated Tony. "Jarvis save this conversation starting from back when Robin started talking about the Tesseract."

"Who's Jarvis?"

"House computer, sort of. What else do you know?"

"I know that having two of the same person in one place at the same time causes damage to the fabric of reality. The damage heals in time if everyone goes back where they belong. It would be good to be sure there isn't another me out there but I don't think there will be. This world is very, very different than mine. I think this reality is much farther away than any portal my people have known before. I've never seen a portal generator as big as your Tesseract. Usually a portal generator is about the size of a briefcase except for the power supply."

"Anything else?"

"Nope, you've tapped me out. I was kind of hoping maybe you could help me build like a teeny-tiny boom tube from the Tesseract plans I gave you; so I could get a radio signal out. The Tesseract was rubbish. It was radioactive, unstable and created time distortions but maybe if all we were trying to do was get a radio signal out, it would be a lot safer? Batman could follow the radio signal and bring me home. I think I remember the right settings. I hope I do." Robin pleaded. He was giving Tony such a pathetic look, Tony could feel his reactor heart bleeding for the kid.

"Kid you've got the most powerful pair of puppy dog eyes I've ever seen." Tony protested.

Robin just kept looking at him.

"Turn it off kid!"

"I don't know how!" Robin started crying. He hid his face in his bear.

"Oh kid… I'll help," Tony said in defeat. "World ending dangerous huh?"

Robin was shuddering, hiccuping, coughing and crying. He felt bad for even asking. It was too dangerous.

Thor had apparently woken up. "Why is he crying?!" he demanded of Tony.

"Because he wants to go home," explained Tony wearily. "He has a plan but he needs help and he didn't think he had a right to ask for it."

Robin couldn't stop crying.

"No really little guy, we have to learn about the technology for our own sake. What safer way then a teeny tiny radio signal to someone friendly. It's a good idea," Tony tried.

Robin couldn't stop crying.

"Is he hurt," asked Bruce who'd followed after Thor.

"He's fine," insisted Tony. "He's just sad."

"Why's he crying?" asked Steve.

"Great kid, look what you did now. You've woken the whole tower!"

Clint and Natasha entered.

"Why's he crying?" asked Clint.

"Oh for the love of … Short stuff, shut off the water works," pleaded Tony.

"The lot of you are absolutely useless!" declared Natasha picking Robin up in a hug and wandering off with him. "Shh, it's okay. Shhh…"

"What did you do to him?" asked Thor when Natasha was back, not five minutes later.

"I put him down for a nap. He got what three hours sleep last night? What did you expect?" Natasha answered.


	7. Robin in the Rain

_This chapter was inspired by the song "Robin in the Rain," by Claire Senior Burke, as sung by Raffi._

 _\- Robin in the rain, such a saucy fellow._

Robin woke again about 4 hours later. The infirmary was empty this time. Jarvis, the house computer, instructed him to stay where he was and that someone would be along momentarily. Okay robo-nanny thought Robin. Just to be sure of his situation he tried the infirmary door to make sure it would open. Feeling more confident with the door open, he stared at his reflection in the shiny stainless steel door. It was both surprising and normal how little he was. He hadn't brushed his hair in days. That part was wonderful. Robin shook his head pretending to be one of those fuzzy haired trolls with a gem in the belly. He wouldn't mind brushing his teeth. He knew he should be focused on getting home but he wasn't sure what to do now.

It was Thor who came for him.

"Hi! I have no idea what to do with myself," admitted Robin smiling up at him feeling a little nervous and at the moment very aware of his size. "Is your whole family as tall as you are? I seemed to be cursed to forever make tall friends."

Thor gestured for Robin to follow him. He was a little surprised when a small hand slipped into his.

"Sustenance first," Thor answered softly. Asgardians, were so long lived they almost never had children. He ate his own lunch of three large chicken sandwiches, finished off with an apple and a beer. He watched quietly as Robin ate almost a quarter of a sandwich, a few grapes and what looked to him like a thimble full of milk before pushing his plate away.

"Is this normal?" Thor asked of Bruce who was also there eating lunch gesturing to the child's plate.

"It's okay for now," Bruce reassured pushing up his glasses. "This new role? I've never met someone instantly at ease with it."

Thor did not like the thought of not being equal to any task but he was completely out of his comfort zone.

"Thor, he'll be hungry in an hour. It's just how a very young child is built."

Thor took an apple out of the fruit basket and passed it to Robin for later.

Robin looked at the apple then balanced it on his head with a grin and looked up at Thor questioningly. Then Robin took an orange and pear too and started juggling all three. When Thor glared at him, Robin put all the fruit back sheepishly and climbed under the table. Confused Thor looked under the table. Robin was just sitting there tracing swirly patterns in the floor, kind of unhappily.

Bored, so bored… thought Robin. I can't go see Mr. Stark yet. That'll just slow things down.

"Roar!" Robin yelled popping up beside Bruce suddenly. "Can Hulk come out to play?"

Bruce jumped back startled at little but shook his head smiling, "Sorry, I don't really get to choose. He comes out when I'm upset or angry."

"That's sad," said Robin. "Have you ever been to a Monster Truck show? Smash, Crash! I saw a truck that shot fire and it had …" Robin fell silent because Thor looked, well not exactly unhappy but stressed.

"What's the matter?" asked Robin. Robin never got an answer because an alarm started blaring and amber lights started flashing.

Jarvis's voice came over the intercom. "Avengers assemble. Avengers to the war room."

"Stay with Dr. Banner," ordered Thor leaving quickly.

He heard Robin's disappointed protest to Bruce as he left. "Why don't you get to go?"

At the end of the day, Thor sat watching Robin sleep and thinking, "This child is going to be the end of me. What in the nine realms have I gotten myself into?"

Leaving Robin with Dr. Banner had seemed like a responsible thing to do. Dr. Banner was easily the most mature adult in the Avengers. They'd been gone for three and a half hours. The mission briefing had been about and hour of that time. Everything had seemed fine when they first left the base. They were right in the middle of an all out battle when Ironman, whose suit had displays monitoring everything, had shouted over the com-link for him to get back to base now!

"Robin, Hulk, Go!"

Returning to the tower as fast as he could, which as a god was pretty darn fast, Thor found a wall on the eighth floor smashed from the inside out. Huge Hulk sized footprints indented the soft muddy grass below. It was still raining. From then on, the trail was harder to follow, but still clear. Thor chased after Hulk. He caught up with the pair twenty minutes later at Alley Pond Park in Queens.

It wasn't hard to spot Robin he was dressed very brightly in a little red t-shirt, green bicycle short and runners. He had on a yellow rain slicker, which trailed after him like a cape. Hulk was chasing Robin.

Robin laughed in delight while leaping from tree to tree, occasionally splashing down into a puddle. He was playfully taunting the huge green giant. He'd fashioned himself some sort of grapple gun, probably from Stark's lab junk and would fire it up to a high structure, then swing away while Hulk roared and smashed after him. The boy leaped and tumbled with reckless abandon obviously having mountains of terrifying fun.

He leaped down into the mud by the waters edge making a muddy splash. "I CAN SPLASH BIGGER THAN YOU!"

Hulk leaped down, pounding the mud. Mud flew everywhere. Robin cheered and cart wheeled away firing off his grapple gun again.

"STOP!" Bellowed Thor.

"COME PLAY!" cheered Robin.

"ARRRGGHHH!" roared Hulk.

Thor dismayed, chased after the child who seemed oblivious to the likelihood that he was going to get himself killed. Hulk was infuriated by Thor's interference. Things got rough. The chase degenerated into a wrestling match between Hulk and Thor. It was becoming progressively more violent by the minute. Robin looked at the two of them a little disappointed then launched himself from a tall tree directly toward Hulk. Thor had to admit, he thought the kid was done for but Hulk snatched the child out of the air. Robin proceeded to hug the green monster round the neck.

"Time to go home," said Robin to Hulk with a contented smile. "You caught me. You win."

Thor was forced to escort them home at a distance. Every time he got close to Robin, Hulk got annoyed. When they finally got back to the lawn in front of the tower at rambling, Hulk go where Hulk want speed, the sun had gone down. Hulk plunked himself down on the grass, in the rain. Robin sat in his lap telling Hulk stories of far off lands and incredible people until the green faded and he was sitting with Dr. Banner.

"I love Hulk," said Robin happily.

"You are the most annoying and marvelous child I have ever met," said Bruce with a huff. All of them were soaked from head to foot.

"Is it safe now?" called Thor who'd kept patient vigil, his arms crossed and his cape dripping.

Bruce looked down and away, then quickly ducked into the tower.

Thor looked down at Robin who promptly refused to meet his eyes and kept glancing back at the huge hole in the wall. "Have you anything to say for yourself?" asked Thor stern.

Robin gave a quick shake of the head.

"Pardon?" repeated Thor.

"no sir."

Thor plucked Robin up and tossed him over one shoulder marching upstairs with him. He took him up to his room and dumped the child in the shower and turned the cold water on all the way. "Wash! You are filthy!" He stormed off to get the child's nightclothes. When he got back Robin was standing on the bathmat wrapped in a towel and shivering. "Dress, brush your teeth, brush your hair, bed!"

"i'm hungry," whispered Robin.

"And there's a big hole in the kitchen."

"yes sir."

A small bed had been made up for Robin in Thor's suite of rooms. Apparently mass destruction was exhausting. The child passed out almost immediately. After staring at him overwhelmed for a good half hour, Thor left to inspect the damages.

Tony was already busy directing workers, "Is the kid okay?"

Thor nodded. "How fared the team after my departure?"

"We managed," answered Tony. Then he gestured to the hole. "$17,000 in damages. It's chump change in the Hulk collateral damages fund but $17,000 in damages in one day."

"You will be reimbursed for the damages," insisted Thor. "He is my responsibility."

Bruce padded softly into the kitchen in clean, dry, casual clothes. It was rare for him to show his face so soon after Hulk had been loose.

Everyone looked at him expectantly.

Bruce sighed softly before speaking, "The child knew what he wanted. He wanted Hulk to play with him. He pestered me relentlessly."

"He tied my shoelaces together. He put salt in my tea. For twenty minutes he jumped out at me every half minute like a spooky little ninja trying to startle me. He put that stupid song, 'Space cat Jack wears a really cool hat. Look at that space cat Jack,' on a continual loop on every monitor and every speaker in the entire place. Tony, he programmed all your little robots to march around after me in time to that stupid song. He gift-wrapped all my research in toilet paper, painted my stapler pink with nail polish, filled the microwave with ball bearings. Actually, I think it was the microwave that finally got me. I went to heat up a cup of tea, opened the microwave and the ball bearings went everywhere, I slipped …eh."

"That other side of me is sleeping perfectly content right now. Hulk has never … Robin was completely unafraid, playful and one hundred percent accepting."

Tony was scowling when Pepper poked him in the arm. "I'm always good." She mimicked laughing.

"I've never taken the Hulk for a joy ride," protested Tony.

"How much damage did you do the first time you took the Ironman suit out? And you didn't have I'm five as an excuse."

"Why is it always pick on Tony time," protested Tony.

"Did you talk to him about this?" Steve asked Thor.

"In the morning," answered Thor wearily.

 _My Beta Reader insists this chapter represents every kids dream but, only Robin could do it and live._

 _Review for Christmas. It makes me so happy._


	8. Media Mob

_Because comfort is derived from the Latin to bring strength and every hero should be strong._

Thor's thought he'd be off duty for the night but around about three in the morning Robin woke, wandered blearily over to the closet, pee-peed in it, pulled a shirt off a hanger.

"ROBIN!" Thor corrected sharply.

The boy screamed in terror, jumped about two feet in the air and bolted straight into a wall, almost knocking himself out. He sat on the floor. Thor could hear his little heart racing. The little guy looked around completely disoriented.

Suddenly understanding, Thor got out of bed and crouched down. "Son, are you awake?"

Robin didn't answer. He just stared off into space panting with a terrified look on his face.

Thor guided him back to bed and tucked him in. Robin lay there staring off into space nearly hyperventilating.

"Close your eyes." Robin closed his eyes.

Thor went and cleaned up the mess wordlessly then went back to check on the child. He was still panting and his heart was still racing. Thor tucked the teddy bear into the child's arms then sat beside the child and rubbed his back soothingly for about half an hour until Robin calmed and seemed properly at rest.

Children are strange creatures thought Thor. Asgardians were small for such a brief span of time compared against a life span of millennia. Thor wondered what he himself had been like at Robin's age and how his own father had dealt with him. It seemed the thought alone was an invitation.

" **You did not move with near as much fluidity and grace,** " he heard his father's voice echo.

"You have been watching?" asked Thor.

" **We are entertained. His play is Asgardian."**

"His form is fragile. A thorny rose could draw blood."

 **"Is it that one of your age still requires sturdy playthings?"**

"He is not a plaything."

 **"The peace of Asgard can be a fragile thing."**

"The peace of Asgard is not a plaything either."

Thor heard his father's laugh echo away into the stillness of the night.

The gods were not the only one's who'd been watching. Captain America knocked on his door in the morning. "We've got Sheild and we've got media. It's all over the news." Steve looked at Thor who was already dressed and Robin who was sleepily climbing out of bed. He dug through Robin's newly filled dresser and pulled out a small pair of jeans and a black t-shirt tossing them towards Robin.

"Robin. We've got media. You are going to be on display and after the stunt you pulled yesterday, you've left Hulk vulnerable. No one wants to think he's a danger to children everywhere. We talked about this at the hospital. Thor is dad, act half godly or something. You did this. You protect Hulk from the fall out," Captain America ordered.

"You want me to dress matchers with Thor?" Robin pulled on the clothes.

Captain America stared at him for a little while thinking. "The acrobatics you were doing in the park. I saw the news footage. That's not an ordinary 5 year old sort of thing."

"I was messing around."

"What you were doing yesterday will be enough," insisted the Captain.

"I'm supposed to be able to do a quad. I was having trouble with a reliable triple," muttered Robin sounding like a bitter teenager for a moment while struggling with the button on his jeans like a five year old. He was still only half awake.

"Then right here, right now stick to a double," ordered Captain America not really knowing what the boy meant by a quad or triple but understanding the math.

"Medium double, double?" asked Stark sticking his head in the door and handing Captain America a cup of coffee then adjusting the gloves on his Ironman suit. Tony seemed to be trying to diffuse Captain America with humor. "And one black." He handed a Thor a coffee as well.

"You," ordered Captain America adjusting his shield and turning to Ironman. "No more talking to the press. I saw that headline, Hulk Hullabaloo? That's got you all over it." Stark gave Captain America a slightly offended look but shook it off.

Natasha slipped in, passed Robin a juice box and knelt beside him. She took up a hairbrush attacking the child's hair. "Sweet thing, Steve's not trying to throw you to the dogs but you need to help make this better." She was looking at Steve worriedly.

Robin was silent as the frantic prep and panic escalated. He was watching Captain America with a confused expression watching his body language and listening to his tone as he talked. Robin waved off Natasha and climbed on a chair. Nope still not tall enough, stepping carefully he climbed up on Thor's Desk and waited as Hawkeye and finally even Dr. Banner pushed into the room most talking at the same time and no one really listening.

Robin put his fingers in his mouth and let loose a piercing whistle. In the moment of silence that followed he barked out, authoritative despite being unable to deepen his voice enough to go for the tone he thought the captain needed. "Captain, you are panicking like a new recruit. Sit down. Have you listened to yourself? Impersonate a god? No more talking to the press because of some Hulk Hullabaloo headline? This is not how to treat teammates!"

In a softer and apologetic voice Robin pleaded, "What is it about me that shuts down your higher reasoning? They wouldn't listen to you if you were like this all the time."

The room was silent now. Steve looked shocked, not at Robin exactly but more at his own phrases thrown back at him "Sorry," he stuttered staring at Robin like he was looking at a ghost. He looked like he wanted to say more but he had no words.

Robin sat crisscross on the desk and began calmly speaking, "Shield is homeland security correct? They are essentially an extension of the government. Can we assume they are smart enough to be reasonably sure I'm extra-dimensional but that for diplomatic reasons they elected to let me go." Robin nodded towards Thor who would be the diplomatic reason in question.

Steve nodded.

Tony itched his nose and looked a little embarrassed before adding. "When I was talking to Fury I was pretty careful not to make any biological claim. I wanted them off balance enough to let you go but I didn't want to create a scenario where one lab test made liars out of all of us."

"Almost every culture I know practices some form of adoption," spoke Robin who voice shook a little on the word adoption. He took a shuddering breath before continuing. "So Shield is likely here representing the public interest with respect to Hulk?"

"This is not your run of the mill five year old," Hawkeye muttered to Black Widow who shushed him.

"That's why Shield would be here," Black Widow confirmed for Robin.

"Ironman can you bring up the media footage to show us all, so we know what we are dealing with?" Robin asked.

"Let's move to the war room," said Stark as he nodded.

Robin grabbed his bear as they went to leave and looked mournfully at Captain America. Thor picked him up. "Thank you. It needed to be said," Thor said discretely to Robin who looked very insecure. Thor knew gods were watching. Robin's refusal to impersonate a god had been insightful and utterly imperative. He also noticed that Robin had defended him and Stark but made no attempt to point out to the Captain that holding a child responsible for the Hulk's public image was complete foolishness. The public would demand that the Avengers be the adults.

"It is you and I who are going to have to answer for this," spoke Bruce. "You can't let a kid play in traffic."

Thor did not understand the reference. "Play in traffic?"

"Do something so obviously dangerous as to be considered suicidal to a responsible adult. I might not have been able to hold my temper but I could have called for backup before I lost it."

"I wasn't playing in traffic," protested Robin. "I grew up with metas," he explained thinking of Uncle Clark, Connor, Wally, and Aunt Diana. "Dr. Banner you need to cut yourself a break. Hulk is a part of you. You won't hurt someone because they're annoying. It's not in you. You'll just have to trust me that there's a difference between angry and homicidal."

"What is a meta?" asked Thor.

"It's a catch-all phrase for humanoids possessing powers," Robin explained still glancing towards Steve.

After watching the grainy video footage that had been captured, Ironman enhanced the footage enough that it could be seen clearly.

"When seen clearly, it looks fun except for when Thor got there and unbalanced the interplay," commented Hawkeye grinning. "Robin you're a circus brat! Don't get me wrong. It takes one to know one, but that's circus if I've ever seen it."

Robin let escape small pleased smile before hiding his face in his bear. He was in another dimension, could a little family pride really hurt? The Grayson's had been the number one ranked trapeze artists in the world. Is it okay Batman? The memory of his parent's death ghosted across him dully but it seemed the Martians efforts had given him one kind gift. The memory of his parent's life was stronger than the memory of their death.

A crude cheeky little smattering of Romani answered Hawkeye.

Hawkeye understood the phrase, "I was born to fly," but the rest of what the kid had said was off color innuendo and swearing; circus family in-crowd talk. Clint spoke little Romani but he recognized it from his own circus days. His circus had some Rom: a fortuneteller, snake handler and twin contortionists.

"Your mother'd wash your mouth out with soap if she heard you repeat that Rom!" Hawkeye answered grinning.

"We sort this mess out first; you show me what you can do? I was sideshow but you're an international headliner. You are! It's in the way you carry yourself and Romani is your native language." Clint Barton was now very intrigued by Robin but now was not really the time for it.

Robin stood, spread his hands and gave a slightly playful introductory bow. "I am equally at home in the spot light or in the shadows."

The Captain looking older and tired slowly knelt in front of Robin. "You asked what shuts down my higher reasoning. I didn't recognize it until Hawkeye pointed it out. It's the Rom, the Gypsy in you. I was there in the 1940's in the worst of it, fighting the Nazi." The Captain pulled the child into a shaking hug. "Kid," he said with a broken hurt laugh. "I hope to heaven, you have no idea why that might, shut me down, as you put it."

"The Porajmos," whispered Robin, who then fell silent. He wondered if it was one particular Rom child or a larger group Captain America had failed to save.

It was Black Widow who spoke next, "Captain, we could tell something was wrong. Everyone here has shadows, which haunt them. No one even fought back when you started acting crazy. We just tried to help. Can you let us take this? Just stand in the background and impersonate the strong silent type."

Steve nodded.

A little more discussion and they were ready to face the press.

Ironman acted as their spokes person while everyone but Thor and Robin stood on the front steps, which were acting as a stage. "We, the Avengers take your concerns very seriously. We have cleaned up the footage from yesterday and will be re-releasing it for examination. The child in question was unharmed and has asked to speak to you on Hulk's behalf."

Thor brought Robin out, sheltering the boy in front of himself with a hand on each of the child's shoulders. Ironman passed Robin a microphone. "I didn't mean to get my friend Hulk in trouble. We made the hole in the wall when we slipped on the ball bearings. Hulk freaked out because he thought I was going to crack my head open on the floor so he wrapped himself around me and we both ended up going through the wall because he's so strong and he was upset." This part Robin spoke with remorse and genuine apology.

Robin, at this point seemed to forget his scripted speech and he looked up at the partially repaired hole with a naughty monkey grin and in a progressively more and more excited voice, forgetting to hold the microphone properly, turned to Thor. "Then I got him to play tag! We splashed in the puddles! He even smashed open this great big rock! HULK SMASH! Did you see when I flipped over the monkey bars and Hulk jumped higher than the tree and…"

"Robin enough!" Spoke Thor looking like he wanted to start pulling his own hair out and taking the microphone from the boy and passing it to Captain America. "Have you listened at all, last night or this morning? You may not play with Hulk. He'd feel horrible if he accidentally hurt you." Thor's big booming voice needed no amplification.

"Faðir you over reacted when you found us in the park." Robin protested stubbornly.

"We are not talking about this again, out here, in front of a bunch of reporters!" Thor picked up Robin and took him back inside. Robin was still protesting that Hulk was awesome.

What had seemed a P.R. disaster ended up fairly positive for the Hulk. Thor ended up teased by the media quite a bit and the frenzy over who Robin was, was unbelievable. There was no Avengers official media release on Robin. The media had picked up on the word Faðir. Thor did what he always did. He ignored media related to him as if it was beneath him.

 **Porajmos – The Romani genocide of World War II. About 25 % of the Roma in Europe at the time were gathered up and killed.**

 _ **Bonus Material**_

 _A little amber button labeled R.H. on the Watch Tower console was testament to the fact that Captain America wasn't the first to desperately hug or cry on Robin. Sometimes, it seemed adults just needed tactile confirmation that they hadn't failed every child on the planet._

 _Martian Manhunter and Batman were the only ones with the code to activate the button. Keeping heroes sane was part of what the Justice League was for. After two different Leaguers had ambushed Robin in one week, back when he was nine, Manhunter and Batman had, had a long discussion about heroes using Robin as a comfort toy, as an angry Batman had put it._

 _Jon had explained that it honestly seemed to help Robin come to terms with the reality that sometimes tragedy just happened and that everyone was trying his or her best to prevent it. Batman relented and Robin always came when called; woken in the middle of the night, called out of school, sparing with Batman, stop what you're doing, slap on a mask, zeta up into outer space and just sit, just silently accept hugs and tears for the comfort of hero who had seen too much._

 _Not long ago a Mount Justice broadcast, "R.H. alert. Robin to Watch Tower." Had resulted in major grumbling in the newly formed Young Justice team. Why was Robin, the youngest and not even a Meta, so favored by the Justice League? No one else was ever invited up to the Watch Tower. Why was he playing it down?_

 _Roy who'd been there at the time scoffed at the lot of them and told them an R.H. alert wasn't something to be jealous of but refused to tell them what an R.H. alert was. Roy knew but wouldn't tell them._

 _It was Hal Jordan that time. Broken and needing to hug a kid after a school bus full of children crashed off a cliff, slipping right through the fingers of his big green catcher's mitt, because it was yellow. Hal wasn't even usually a hugger._

 **If you had to guess, which hero labeled the button R.H. and what does it stand for?**


	9. Drinking Games

_Because even when kids are annoying you can't just give up and wash your hands of them._

Breakfast was late by the time the media issue was cleared up. The kitchen was covered in drywall dust and the only cereal available was Bitty-Bites with a picture of Ironman on the box. It had been bought as a gag gift some time ago. It was disgustingly stale and the layer of drywall dust settling on the milk made it even less appetizing. Robin ate three bites then dumped the rest. Yuck. Everyone else was also disappointed with breakfast a-la-drywall dust so Tony ordered catered sandwiches for lunch. Everything had mayonnaise: egg salad, tuna salad and chicken salad. Robin couldn't stand mayonnaise. He ate the lettuce garnishing then asked to be excused. Robin missed Alfred's cooking. Robin was so homesick he wasn't hungry anyway. Thor who was sat with a plate heaped with sandwiches was frowning at him again but Robin just couldn't force himself to eat.

He'd been left to his own devices for most of the day. Natasha dumped a stack of coloring books next to him and told him sternly to stop making trouble and that the Avengers had things to do.

Robin tried to accommodate and made a rather disturbing discovery. He had no idea how to hold a crayon or pencil anymore. Holding the crayon in his fist awkwardly he scribbled out some advanced calculus and geometry. There was no problem with that. He drew out the periodic table. The third column was blank. Robin looked at his shoes but they had Velcro fasteners so he found a string instead. He could untie any knot effortlessly but he could only remember how to tie a few knots and he was sure that wasn't right. He went through the languages he was supposed to know. Romani, Romanian, English, French, Japanese, Spanish, Russian, Italian okay but most of those he'd had a strong base in at five. German and Arabic, were spotty, Cantonese was completely gone, ehh.. a lot was gone. He wasn't done investigating but for a little while he stopped investigating himself. The Jarvis Robo-sitter reported back to Thor every time he changed rooms.

After dinner which to be completely honest, he didn't eat. He asked if anyone would play hide and seek with him. They could see he was looking unhappy so Thor and Steve agreed to play. They should probably have remembered that a certain tiny ninja could hide really well. Steve had the foresight to set boundaries for the game before agreeing to play. Robin was to stay inside the building. Robin asked them to pause Jarvis because using the Robo-sitter would be cheating.

Thor agreed. He could hear the heartbeat of a butterfly, he was certain finding a hiding child would be easy.

Robin was hiding on top of the HVAC unit installed in the hanger of tower. He had been listening at doors and hacking restricted files again. It probably wasn't a good habit to have when you were five and almost completely dependant on the kindness of strangers. He was hiding now because he wanted to find somewhere he could cry in peace without having to answer what's wrong. He didn't want to hear another well meaning, it's okay little one or some other diminutive reassurance.

He'd heard Mr. Banner talking with Mr. Stark about the Tesseract. Apparently, Robin's trip through the portal had exposed him to four times the amount of radiation necessary to kill an adult. Apparently, he would have died without Thor's godly intervention. That he'd almost died wasn't what was bothering Robin. It's that when he thought about it, that meant Batman and the League thought he was dead. Batman would move heaven and earth to rescue him if he thought there was a chance but the League would know just how much radiation the Tesseract had put off. Batman wasn't looking for him. He was grieving.

Bruce would be so sad and Batman would be so angry. All Bruce had ever wanted of him, was for him to be a light in the darkness. Alfred would be heart broken. There were so many others too. Robin had to let them know he was alive.

The other thing was the Avengers had some big spy mission coming up so all work on the Mini-Tesseract, Radio-ract, Tesseradio, E.D. phone home, Robin phone, Boom Tuner, Bird-a-ract, Tweet machine? Okay, at the last goofball name, even Robin had to admit he was trying to distract himself. Anyway, all work on getting him home would be paused. Robin knew he was clever but building that Tesser-thing was completely out of his depth. Straight A student or not, he hadn't even finished high school. Advanced inter-dimensional engineering was beyond him.

I want someone to call me Dick again, or Dickie or Richard. I don't want to be Robin right now, he thought.

Robin had hid from Metas before. He was reasonably sure the rhythmic thrumming of the HVAC would hide the sound of his breathing and heartbeat. The tiny space he was scrunched in seemed too small to fit even someone of his size. Most people wouldn't think to look up 80 feet in the air to see if he was hiding near the ceiling. The HVAC already had a different heat signature than the rest of the room. Robin had checked for sensors and found none. The tower was thick with sensors. Robin cried himself to sleep hidden on top of the HVAC unit.

"Seriously?" said Tony who after the fourth hour had suited up to help look. "The Mighty Avengers can't find one little boy?"

For the last three hours the loud speakers had been repeating every five minutes, "Robin come out the game is over!"

The HVAC unit was really loud. Robin didn't stir.

They were fairly certain Robin had not left the Tower as the external sensors had never been deactivated or triggered

Thor sent a weary silent questioning prayer to his father at around hour five. "Do you know where my son hides?"

A deep booming laugh was his response. After a few minutes of conversation with his father, Thor went to conference with the other Avengers.

"I bear glad tidings and irksome ones." Thor spoke.

"Did you find him?" was chorused by several voices.

"No, however. I have spoken with the All Father," admitted Thor reluctantly.

"And..." prompted Tony.

"We are providing mirth and merriment. A great drinking game has begun. They toast at each address of the intercom. Wagers have been set as to who shall first discover my son," Thor added.

The Avengers looked less then pleased at these revelations.

"What part was the glad tidings?" asked Steve trying to be patient.

"Can we infer from this that Robin is unharmed and is hiding somewhere close and obvious enough that it is extra amusing?" guessed Clint in an annoyed tone.

Thor nodded reluctantly.

"Why doesn't he just come out?" asked Steve not really expecting anyone to answer.

"It's close to midnight," explained Natasha tiredly. "He's probably fallen asleep in his hiding spot."

"Should we set off the fire alarm or something?" asked Steve.

Tony, who on any given day, had an annoying amount of trivia floating around in his head just shrugged. "It'd be a wasted effort. Most kids will sleep right through a fire alarm."

Robin's internal clock was very precise most days. At five in the morning he woke up, looked around confused. "Uh-oh."

"Robin come out the game is over!" Jarvis announced.

The sun was coming up. "JARVIS I'M AWAKE! I'M COMING! I'M COMING!" Robin yelled out, scrambling down frantically.

Avengers can move really fast. By the time he got to the hanger floor everyone was in the hanger.

Robin was apologizing frantically, nearly hysterically before anyone could say anything. "I'm sorry. I fell asleep. I wouldn't do that on purpose. I promise. Look, I'm easily the most kidnapped kid ever, after 28 kidnappings I promise I come out when called, I didn't hear. That would be horribly mean! Look, Batman installed a subcutaneous tracker two years ago. I can give you the code. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"Stop," interrupted Thor.

"Seriously 28 kidnappings?" Steve muttered. "How?"

"Have you been crying?" asked Natasha. The kid was covered in a fine layer of dust. Tear tracks could clearly be seen.

"No," denied Robin in a near whisper.

"You owe us kid. Fess up," insisted Stark.

Robin was silent for a while trying to decide what to give away. "I heard you talking. Four times the amount of radiation necessary to kill an adult. Batman's not looking for me. They all think I'm dead." The tears started again. He couldn't hold them back.

Steve got down on one knee and pulled Robin to him though the boy wouldn't look at him. "Focus on what you have control over. You're not dead. You're doing your best to get back to them. Are you listening?"

Robin nodded silently.

"Kid you want to see what progress I've made?" asked Stark. Sleep was overrated.

Robin nodded again.

"I really want to strangle him right now but those beautiful blue puppy dog eyes just break my freaking heart." Robin heard Natasha muttering to Clint as she wandered off to go to bed at long last.

 _Extra Nonsense:_

 _Everyone knew what R.H. stood for. I had the following opinions submitted on the R.H. button labeler: Batman, Martian Manhunter, Superman and Flash. My opinion is as follows_

 _Did Batman label the R.H. button? Absolutely not, never! He'd agree to Robin's participation for Dick's sake but would do nothing to encourage or advertise what was going on. He doesn't share well at the best of times and getting him to share Robin? Just No._

 _Did Martian Manhunter label the R.H. button? Maybe when he was alone on the space station for too long a stretch and had been into the Oreos one time too many._

 _Did Superman label the R.H. button? He's goofy enough to but he tries so hard not to upset people. I think he'd restrain himself out of sympathy for Batman's feelings._

 _Did Flash label the R.H. button? If anyone were going to tease Batman just to get a rise out of him, it would be Barry Allen. He's the only one who could run fast enough to get away after._


	10. Bird Flu

_Because yes, the government can be stupid but so can anybody. Just keep trying to make things better…_

For a few days things went fairly smoothly.

Thor and Dr. Banner had started to commiserate over the fact that Robin wasn't eating. Pepper even made chocolate chip cookies. Robin wouldn't eat them. Tony was incredulous. "What kind of kid won't eat fresh baked chocolate chip cookies?"

Refusing to let him leave the table until his plate was clear? Robin was happy to sit in front food for hours. He had a captive audience. He started telling knock knock jokes. He prattled on about elephants. Bruce was rather surprised when the child spelled out pi in peas to the fourteenth decimal place. He ran out of peas and Thor ran out of patience letting Robin be excused from the table.

Forcing the child to eat had resulted in a mess to clean up.

"Is he ill?" Thor asked Bruce.

"Sort of," Dr. Banner tried to explain. "A lot has happened to him. His mind and body aren't coping well."

The day before they were due to head out, Director Fury contacted them cancelling the mission. The two guards who had been stationed in Robin's hospital room were showing flu like symptoms.

"Seriously?" protested Stark. "There's been something going round since before Robin got here."

Natasha sneezed and Clint coughed.

"The lot of you are quarantined," snapped Fury. "This is not something we can mess around with."

Dr. Banner took charge of things reluctantly. HAZMAT suited Shield agents swarmed the building. There were a few glass walled isolation rooms in the basement of the tower. Clint and Natasha were ordered into one. Thor had no idea what was going on, so Tony explained to Robin why he was being put in the next room while Dr. Banner coordinated with the Shield disease and infection control team.

Natasha wanted to hit something. Clint was drumming his fingers on the arm of the chair in annoyance. Robin standing wide eyed holding his bear and his laughing puppy quilt backed into a corner of his new fish bowl room while stern HAZMAT suited soldiers, set up high tech equipment. He glanced over at Clint and Natasha looking terrified.

"This is ridiculous. All this over a simple cold?" protested Natasha.

Clint sighed, "At least they didn't insist on the entire team in containment rooms; only the kid, and anyone with symptoms. The kid is healthy though."

"He did throw up at lunch," offered Natasha.

"Thor was trying to force feed him beef stew," protested Clint. "It was cold by then too. Have you ever been force fed cold beef stew?"

Eventually Dr. Banner came accompanied by a Shield doctor. Protocol forced him to suit up in a HAZMAT suit and go through decontamination before entering the isolation rooms. He went to Natasha and Clint first.

"I'll need blood samples and swabs and we'll be doing a full physical," he explained. "I don't want this going on longer than necessary. I've put Robin in his own room because I think this illness is local and just as we may not have defenses against something from his home dimension, we don't know how resistant his immune system will be to something from our dimension."

"This strikes me as horse poop. The dimensions are similar enough that a higher order being such as a human still looks, acts and talks like a human and we are concerned that single cell organisms are so drastically different as to be a world wide threat?" Natasha spat.

"Are you seriously going to drain this much blood from the boy? Freaking vampire," complained Clint after all the blood samples had been taken.

Bruce and the Shield doctor finished up, then moved on to Robin. Robin cooperated silently.

"Tony said he talked to you. Do you know what's going on?" Bruce asked the child who looked terrified.

Robin nodded.

By the time all of the blood samples had been taken Robin was pale and swaying slightly. Bruce completed the physical trying to keep things light and playful. Robin's blood pressure was low, his heartbeat was fast and he was shivering.

"Robin?" spoke Dr. Banner kindly. "I need you to eat and drink something, especially after all the blood tests. If you don't, I'm going to have to start poking you with needles." Bruce wasn't comfortable explaining with words like hypovolemia or acute stress reaction, which he was starting to see signs of in the child.

Robin obediently reached for the drink box beside the bed. He'd been utterly silent during the entire examination. As Bruce was about to leave Robin spoke in the softest of voices. "I saw Zombie Apocalypse seven times with Kid Flash. It's his favorite movie. Am I really patient zero because I'm not from here? Are Clint and Natasha going to die? Is everybody going to die?"

Bruce whipped around so fast he almost dropped the samples he was carrying. "I'm going to kill that idiot Stark," he muttered. He could feel himself going green so he backed out of the room as fast as he could. Someone else would have to sort this out.

"STARK!"

Tony looked up from the logistics problem he was working on. When Bruce Banner sounded that annoyed, you paid attention. In fact, everyone in the vicinity paid attention. The Captain and Thor who'd been nearby, skidded into the room.

Green veins traced all along Bruce's hands and face.

"Come on Bruce," tried Steve, "a cup of tea; a little meditation?"

"You want me to calm down, let me yell at him for a bit!" Banner snapped out.

"What happened?" asked Steve carefully.

"AT WHAT POINT DID IT SEEM A GOOD IDEA TO TELL A CHILD ALREADY TRAUMATIZED BY INTERDIMENSIONAL ABANDONMENT AND DRASTIC PHYSICAL AND MENTAL TRANSFORMATION THAT HE WAS PATIENT ZERO CAUSING THE NEXT ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE?!"

"That wasn't exactly the wording I used. We did talk about zombie movies… how would you explain what's going on?" protested Tony backing away.

Steve threw his hands in the air and backed up. "Tony, if you're really that much of an idiot, you're on your own for this one." Steve dragged Thor away.

"What has Tony Stark done?" asked Thor. His cultural background was so different he had no idea what anyone was talking about.

"Not here, I'll explain later, once we've given Bruce a little extra space," explained Steve.

"How does this concern my son?" repeated Thor.

The yelling went on for a long time. Some smashing was involved.

Steve and Thor went down to the isolation rooms in the basement. Robin was asleep, tangled in his blanket under the hospital bed.

Thor went to go in the room and the Captain corrected him explaining that there was an illness everyone was trying to control and he couldn't go in the room for now.

"He must stay in there all alone, by himself?" asked Thor incredulous.

Steve pushed the intercom on Clint and Natasha's room. "Do you know why he's sleeping under the bed?"

"He's terrified and he thinks that by hiding, no one will figure out he just spent the last hour crying himself to sleep," replied Natasha coldly. "Clint and I are locked in by the way and the intercom doesn't work between patient rooms. And Jarvis won't respond because these rooms were designed for hostiles."

Black Widow looked murderous. She had not enjoyed watching the child cry inconsolably while being unable to do anything about it.

Steve pushed the intercom again, "Tony showed a lapse in judgment," he explained trying to be political. "As if this situation wasn't scary enough with the HAZMAT suits and the glass rooms, Tony thought adding Zombie Apocalypse references would help things make sense to a young child. According to Bruce who I believe is still yelling at Tony, Robin thinks you and everyone else are going to die and it's all his fault."

Clint, who'd been listening, started laughing. "This is got to hit the history books for the worst over reaction to a case of the sniffles ever! Tony wonders why people flinch every time he opens his mouth. Why is Bruce going along with this? I don't get it."

"I'm pretty sure he figured if we weren't seen to be cooperating with a potentially realistic concern, Shield would step in and take Robin by force the moment we let our guard down. I think he was expecting a few simple tests and then the whole issue dropped," Steve guessed.

Natasha wanted to know what the most severe symptom anyone directly involved had displayed.

"Bruce was arguing with them earlier because every symptom parallels the bug the city's been fighting all summer. Apparently if your lab results confirm that theory and Robin's lab results are clean, this whole thing gets dropped but until then they want to careful," Steve explained. It wasn't exactly an answer to Natasha's question but it was all of the Intel he had.

"How long will the lab tests take and are we really trusting Shield to give honest results?" asked Clint.

"Bruce is duplicating every lab test independently to keep them honest," explained Steve. "You'll have to ask Bruce about the time frame. I don't know."

Thor had been listening and had his arms crossed still looking a little confused but starting to look impatient. He grabbed Captain America by the arm a little roughly. "You will explain this to me. I want to know what a zombie is. Why we have allowed Shield soldiers to incarcerate my son. Why he has been crying and thinks everyone is going to die. Why the soldiers are garbed so oddly. You will explain it now. I do not care if you were busy." Thor dragged Captain America off else where. The Captain wasn't really resisting but it certainly didn't look as if this conversation was one he was looking forward too.

"Do the Asgard even get sick?" Clint asked Natasha sneezing then honking his nose on a tissue.

"Don't look at me," Natasha protested. "I'm with Thor on this one. I've got no idea why any of this is going on. We should be looking into the stolen nuclear materials. If some idiot decides to blow us all to kingdom come because they didn't want the Avengers to go to work with a slight head cold, I reserve the right to gut Fury."

Tony stopped by around midnight to change the controls in the isolation ward so everyone could speak freely without one sided intercom codes. He added a projection interface for Jarvis the A.I. in both rooms.

Robin again, woke at five in the morning. It was dark and quiet. Clint and Natasha were sleeping and the HAZMAT suited soldiers were absent at the moment. He crawled out and stood in the center of the room as far away from everything as he could get. He felt so incredibly alone and powerless.

He closed his eyes and into the darkness started to sing.

Natasha and Clint woke. Tony had modified the intercom so they could hear and talk to the child by default. If they wanted privacy, they could turn the intercom off.

"What's he singing?" asked Natasha quietly. The song was beautiful but haunting.

"Not sure. It's Romani though," Clint answered just as quietly.

They stayed quiet because the little guy probably didn't realize anyone could hear him. When he'd fallen asleep, the rooms had been sound proofed.

The elevator dinged and Thor came heading to Robin's door with a determined expression on his face.

"You can't go in there," protested Natasha.

Thor came over to their isolation cell, a dark and broody glower on his face. "You do not understand," he spat out. "That," he growled pointing to Robin, "is a prayer. I have lived for millennia and I know a prayer when I hear one."

"He is praying to you?" asked Natasha confused for a moment.

"Of course not." Thor stated as if the very idea was foolish but he looked pained for a moment. "But, he is mine and I will answer."

Natasha explained the containment protocols and watched as Thor pulled on a HAZMAT suit. She breathed a sigh of relief as Thor picked Robin up in his strong arms, went to a chair and sat with the small boy cradled him his lap and began to explain what kind of an idiot Tony Stark was and what was really going on.

Natasha and Clint turned away to give them some privacy.

Thor never got sick and could decontaminate himself by lightening bolt. The world had grown dependent on the Avengers. Having them all out of commission caused problems. The Avengers and Shield together petitioned Thor to cover the missions that could not wait until after the quarantine was lifted. Tony would help by running the Ironman suit on remote. Thor reluctantly asked Natasha and Clint to keep an eye on his son for him. They were going to be stuck in the fish bowl room right next to Robin for a week to ten days.

Robin was frustrated with himself. Batman would be disappointed in his detective skills and his intelligence. He should have read the situation better. He should have investigated more. Witnesses weren't always reliable. Tony had warned him when they first met that everyone thought he was an idiot. Batman didn't do helpless. Robin didn't do helpless either. He had to be stronger and smarter than this. Robin pushed the furniture clear and began training. After his first few practice routines, Natasha started calling out corrections and suggestions.

"All your forms are non-lethal?" asked Natasha. This was better than the shivering mess the child had been yesterday. The martial arts were advanced but it was like watching someone who'd lost a limb or suffered a stroke. He was relearning, adjusting.

Robin bowed as if to a sensei. "Yes Miss Romanoff."

Natasha nodded. The thought of the sweet little guy killing made her feel sick.

"You need to eat, not just drink Robin," Dr. Banner re-iterated at lunch. "Why are you covered in sweat? Are you running a fever?"

"He's healthy," Clint called out. "He's been running around a lot." The kid was burning some serious calories with his martial arts. Clint pondered the problem then sent an email up to Miss. Potts with a grin. I'm smarter than a five year old, thought Clint.

Robin kept at it all day, intensely focused. When he just didn't stop after hours and hours, Natasha started to look uncomfortable.

At supper time, Robin's plate contained 3 juice boxes in addition to his dinner. Clint smirked when he noticed the boy polished off all three even if he didn't touch his dinner.

"What did you do?" Natasha asked Clint in a whisper.

Clint shut down the intercom system so they could talk privately for a few moments. "You remember when Pepper went all crazy for over raw foods and smoothies? Well I figure, if he's getting the nutrition he needs, everyone can worry about how to settle him enough to accept cheeseburgers later. He's never refused a drink box."

Natasha liked it. Unfortunately sleep brought Natasha nightmares from her past. Robin dressed in her old training suit. She ordered him to kill the other Avengers. He coldly followed orders.

He'd been so intense, so controlled when training the day before. It bothered her.

Clint woke and looked at her. "What are you doing up at 2:30 in the morning downloading pop songs from kid's movies?"

"Go back to sleep or I'll eviscerate you."

"Okay, violent much? Pardon me for asking," chuckled Clint.

"Bad dreams okay. I'm taking care of it."

The next morning Robin cocked his head to the side like a confused puppy listening to Natasha. "You have a new warm up and cool down for me?"

Natasha set Clint to work clearing their furniture while she explained. "You're not, relaxed or loose enough." There was no way she was admitting her own nightmares. "So, for warm up and cool down we're trying something new. I'll demonstrate and you follow."

"Yes Miss Romanoff," Robin bowed formally.

When Captain America came down to check on the patients his jaw dropped. Was the notorious, deadly Black Widow, assassin of the Avengers, dancing hip-hop to Disney tunes with the kid?

Clint was in the corner bound and gagged but laughing like an idiot.

The kid was having fun. He looked happy. He looked five in a good way. And, even taking into account the occasional death glare the Black Widow kept throwing Clint, she looked happy too.

Thor phoned often. Robin would happily chat with him.

Clint saw what Natasha hinted at and stopped poking fun. The child was so intense most of the time. Robin was given a brightly wrapped package the next day. "Hey Robbie, bud?" Clint called out. "Wanna learn some old Romani songs for fun. I've got this circus friend. His name is Pipindorio, he's Rom too and he plays a wicked violin. He'll teach you over the net if you'd like." Clint assumed Batman was Romani and traditional music might bring back comforting memories of home?

Robin was so proud of himself. He didn't cry. He just smiled and said, "Thank you Mr. Barton."

Mr. Stark stayed away. At Bruce/Hulk and Thor's "suggestion" he was using the free time caused by the quarantine, to work on the Tesseract Transmitter. Bruce was helping some. When I finish this, everyone will have to admit I'm not an idiot, thought Stark. He was in denial that he might be feeling any guilt over how badly he'd traumatized Robin. The kid would have no way home without me. I'm awesome.

(Steve had forced Tony to watch footage of Robin, after Tony's less than stellar attempt at explaining the quarantine. Tony might not admit to feeling guilty but he was throwing a lot of time and money into the Tesseract all of a sudden, for someone who wasn't feeling guilty.)


	11. The Boy Wonder

_Because he is Robin the Boy Wonder and bird's well..._

Freed from pointless quarantine at last, the Avengers had some serious catch up work to do. None of them could afford to stay home babysitting and Pepper had some serious work to do getting things caught up for Stark industries.

Clint solved the problem "You see Robbie's been learning to play violin with an old friend of mine from the circus. Pipindorio said he'd take him for the week."

Thor was uncomfortable with the idea. They were discussing things over dinner on the patio of a nearby restaurant. Going out for dinner had been determined essential after a week cooped up in the tower. "I do not want to leave you with strangers."

The restaurant had served a basket of pencil sized bread sticks. Robin had two of them shoved in his mouth like walrus teeth. "Foo fave van vinfortna job. Vits vokay."

"Repeat that without the walrus teeth Robin," encouraged Steve laughing.

"You have an important job. It's okay. Thor, if the world's not safe, I'm not safe either. Besides, it's a circus. What kid doesn't love a circus?" asked Robin grinning just a little bit too eagerly.

"I'll put a tracker on him and we'll get him a communicator," suggested Tony.

"But what about Batman's tracker, can't I just give you the code?" asked Robin.

"Kid unless it was built 7 years ago, it's gone," explained Tony.

"Oh,…" Robin was silent for a long moment. "How's the Tesseract Transmitter coming?"

"Just waiting on some parts before it's ready to test," answered Tony with an encouraging smile.

"Thank you," Robin was still for a little while before adding quietly. "Put a panic button in the tracker. Batman would want it."

"You mentioned you'd been kidnapped often?" spoke Steve carefully. "Why do you think that is a danger here?"

"How long ago were the Avengers founded?" asked Robin raising an eyebrow curiously.

"A year and a half ago," admitted Tony.

Robin started giggling.

"What's so funny?" Asked Steve.

"This is re-ridiculous!" explained Robin. "I'm the most experienced again!" When he finally stopped giggling and sobered, Robin took a deep breath and began talking. "Everyone close to you is a target. Please don't wait to find that out the hard way. Prepare for it. Every ally has the potential to become an enemy. With the right technology, magic, abilities, or just plain manipulation even a hero who is pure hearted can be forced to become a threat. A back up plan to stop even allies is needed. "

"We have back up plans to take down the Hulk," protested Steve.

"What about the rest of you. Take Thor for example. I think the only way to be sure to take out Thor if he needed you too would be to contact his father. Am I guessing wrong?" Robin asked Thor.

Thor looked at Robin with a strangely pensive expression. Then he replied using a term he had not used in a while. "No, little warrior, you are correct. That was the only way to stop my brother and it is the All Father whom I would trust to know if I needed to be stopped."

"What about Mr. Stark," asked Robin? "Could he be stopped if necessary?"

Everyone looked at each other uncomfortably. Stark tech was everywhere.

"Aim at a contingency plan for everything. Batman always calls Superman a Boy Scout but Superman always tells me that it's ironic because it's Batman that always has to, "Be Prepared" and then everyone always starts arguing about whether that's an appropriate use of the word irony."

"Who's Superman?" asked Natasha. The little guy liked talking about his friends, maybe he could be distracted from doom and gloom?

Robin liked that question a lot. He stood in his chair and leaped off the back of it holding his arms out to show flight. "SUPERMAN CAN FLY! HE'S REALLY NICE! HE HAS X-RAY VISION! HE'S FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET! BULLETS BOUNCE OFF HIM! HE HAS LASER VISION! ZAP! ZAP! AND FREEZE BREATH! AND HE'S SO STRONG HE COULD PUSH THE PLANET OUT OF ORBIT IF HE WANTED AND …" Not another word was said at anything less than a yell accompanied by wild gestures. After Robin did an excited triple flip off the tree he'd somehow managed to hop, swing and leap into, Thor grabbed him and plunked him back in his chair.

"Settle down!" Thor encouraged with a booming laugh.

"OKAY!" Robin agreed happily vibrating like a caffeinated squirrel.

Thor insisted on meeting Pipindorio in person.

Stark gave Robin a Stark Industries S-Watch with a built in tracker, phone, internet-access, built in remote bio-readout and a holo-display. It was cutting edge unreleased tech. Robin without needing to be told how, flicked on the holo-display, looked up the tracker code, the phone and contact numbers, checked the internet connectivity, flicked through the installed apps took note of the onboard GPS and then looked up.

"It's waterproof to 300 ft so don't take it off ever. This is how you activate the panic button. Three taps, three slides, three taps. S.O.S. It will send a distress signal and start transmitting audio and all your bio-readouts," Tony explained. Oddly enough the watch did a better job of getting Tony out of the doghouse than all of his work on the Tesseract.

Robin wisely did not point out any similarities between the watch and any gloves he might have had that might have been technologically more advanced. He just said, "Thank you, it's super cool."

The watch was real gold. Robin put shiny bird stickers from the dollar store around the band. Tony was horrified. Robin meekly explained that he put the stickers on it because the watch looked expensive without them and he didn't want someone to steal it because it was really nice. Tony sighed defeated.

Pipindorio greeted Robin with an exuberant hug. He was in his sixties and he had six dogs of assorted size in his trailer. He had pictures of his grandkids everywhere. Thor was dressed in discrete civilian clothes. Holding Robin's blanket, pillow and a small duffle filled with clothes and essentials, he looked around. He could see the boy felt instantly at home. Thor felt a little out of place and unnecessary. The small trailer was not built to accommodate tall, muscular Asgard gods.

"Púrodad Pipi!" Robin greeted enthusiastically. Not a word was spoken in English for quite sometime until Pipindorio corrected Robin on his manners encouraging him to speak English because it was more polite to include everyone.

Clint put Robin's child sized violin down and was pulled into a big friendly hug just as the boy had been.

Thor looked mighty awkward when he was in turn greeted the same way.

Pipindorio's little dogs swarmed happily underfoot and the jovial old man set about putting on a pot of tea for his guests.

"Put those thing down over there. I'll bring some chairs outside. It is a fine day and it is too close in here for four people and six dogs. Come, come; bring your tea! Robin, if you could get the door please?"

Thor looked back as he left Robin with Clint's circus friend. All the Avengers agreed, Thor made an extremely over protective dad but Thor really couldn't imagine Robin coming to harm with the friendly old grandfather looking after him.

Not two hours later the Avengers had just launched the jet when the circus called. Everything was fine but to stay, the circus required proof of insurance and a waiver.

Tony got Pepper working on it. The final paperwork was sent up to the jet electronically enroute for Thor to sign. Tony explained what the paper work all meant. "To simplify, all this means you understand that a circus is risky because of animals and circus-y type things and you agree not to sue them if anything bad happens. You also agree that you're financially responsible for Robin's care, anything he wrecks if stuff happens, yada, yada, yada," explained Tony.

Thor looked at irritated. He was the crown prince of the Asgard. "A contract twenty pages long contains more than hand waving and yada." He spent the next hour reading and having anyone but Tony, explain the terminology he was not familiar with. Thor signed it and sent it off scowling.

"I was right wasn't I?" asked Tony smirking.

Thor scowled more.

From the other side of the world Thor and the Avengers checked in on their small charge regularly. He seemed happy and healthier than he had been. Pipindorio assured them the child was eating. The first day or two had been a little rough but after that he'd had no problem getting the boy to eat.

Clint and Thor could have done him no better favor than a little time in the circus. Pipindorio invited the entire team to come and see the show the day Robin was due to leave.

"He has a part to play and would like you to see him perform," explained the old grandfather with a cheeky smile that looked uncommonly like Robin's occasionally did.

"What's he performing?" Clint begged to know. Pipindorio just smiled mysteriously and told them to come and see.

It was a nasty week of missions, zigzagging across the world. By the end, everyone was tired and feeling the weight of fighting an endless tide of the darkest filth humanity could stir.

Everyone dutifully cleaned up and aimed at respectable looking. If they were all going to the circus there would be cameras involved at some point. Tired though they were, everyone wanted to go. Tony was even bringing Pepper.

They skipped the carnival games but loaded up on popcorn, cotton candy and other assorted treasure.

"Tony if you don't get that bubble gun out of my face I'm going to throttle you!"

"Steve, Thor! Have you honestly never seen a glow stick before?"

"What enchantment doth they hold?"

"Bruce just how much popcorn are you going to eat? Did you seriously polish off both bags?"

"I'll take a balloon animal!"

"Seriously Natasha?"

"Come between me and my balloon penguin and I'll impale your kidney's with a candy apple stick."

Okay, they might have had a bit of stress to burn off.

When the show started, Robin was in the grand parade. He was dressed as a monkey and riding on one of the elephants. He was in front of a woman with feathers in her hair and a sequined body suit. When the elephant got to the center ring it reached up with its' trunk plucked Robin off it's back and put him down on the ground. Robin happily cartwheeled and flipped out of the ring and off stage.

"That must be the reason for the 20 page waiver," declared Thor with a smile. It was a big elephant.

Robin came out again with the clowns dressed as a flower that squirted water. He was small, cute and born for the spot light. Clowns kept picking him up. Aiming him at a friend and pumping is arms until water squirted out of his head.

There were horses and dancing girls, an aerial rope artist, and a magician.

The finale for the first half of the show involved small motorcycles looping upside down and criss-crossing in a ball shaped cage.

Pipindorio and his trained dogs were in the second act. Robin joined them dressed as a puppy dog and pretending to do the same tricks as the dogs. At the end he pretended to fall asleep in the ring. Pipindorio set the biggest of the dogs out to nip at Robin's felt tail. Robin jumped up and holding his hands out in front of him like paws, he hopped out. The large dog on its' hind legs hopped behind him.

"Is it normal for one performer to return to the stage so many times?" Natasha asked Clint.

"It's mandatory," explained Clint. "The smaller the cast, the higher the profits. Robin just stands out because he's a pipsqueak. He's doing really well. The audience loves him."

"I wonder if he's been doing this all week," Steve asked?

"There's no way, he's been doing all of it," protested Clint. "Acts need to be rehearsed. They've probably added him into things as the week went along and he showed an aptitude for performance."

"He brings joy to the masses," praised Thor.

Robin came out again dressed in a miniature tuxedo with his tiny violin tiptoeing dramatically and miming "Shh" to the audience. He began playing very badly. The ringmaster came out making a big show of scolding him, putting his fingers in his ears, complaining and pointing to the audience. Pipindorio and the other musicians came out and pushed the ringmaster to the side, indicating grandly that they would take care of it. Pipindorio coached Robin to play three notes over and over. The rest of the musicians wrapped beautiful and then lively song around those three notes. Robin put down his violin and began to dance. The dancers came onstage and playfully carried him off taking over.

"A lot of the acts are like short stories," observed Tony. Um-hms, and nods of agreement answered him.

Clint said Robin wouldn't appear again because the show was moving toward the grand finale. Each act was bigger and more impressive.

"I want my little cutie back," protested Pepper who'd eaten way too much cotton candy.

"Yeah," Natasha agreed. "He was kind of the point."

"He'll come out at the end for a final bow," Clint reassured.

Finally, the roustabouts were setting up the nets. Clint explained the trapeze artists always finished the show. The Ringmaster announced the act. The Avengers had pretty much tuned him out until they heard the last part

"…and tonight Ladies and Gentlemen we have a special guest! Robin the Boy Wonder!"

And then, their little five year old, came running out with a huge smile and happy waving hands. He was dressed in green pixie boots and a green leotard with a red tunic overtop. There was a stylized R over his heart. He had a yellow belt and a bright yellow cape. The cape was taken off with a flourish and handed to one of the dancers. He started climbing the rope higher and higher.

"Ehh, Thor? I think you might have been wrong about the elephant being the reason for the twenty page waiver," stuttered Tony. "Where's the watch? I don't think he can do what he's about to do wearing the watch."

"It's on his ankle," observed Steve who completely understood that Tony had no interest in the stupid watch, he just happened to be panicking and was being a little random about it.

Tony, in his head was calculating how little force it would take for Robin to break his little neck. This was no backyard swing set.

Robin was not the first to fly. He patiently waited his turn. His first pass was a simple swing to a catch with a return. It was effortless. It was only the beginning. He was thrown to higher levels. He did one flip. He did a mid air twist. Once or twice one of the other artists would miss, ending in a controlled fall to the net below. They would flip out of the net, then remount the rope ladder. Robin didn't miss and his tricks got more and more difficult. He was fluid grace. Though he was only five, he had a clear natural talent that surpassed the other fliers.

"And for our finale Young Robin is going to attempt a trick he's never yet landed in practice. He's been working hard but if you see it tonight it will be an international first. I'd like to ask for complete silence. Robin the Boy Wonder will attempt a quadruple. That's four complete rotations in the air!"

Robin had been working on the quad all week. At twelve he could do it in his sleep. It was a Grayson signature move that marked him as one of the top aerialists in the world. At five he wasn't nearly as strong as he used to be and he'd not yet managed it, but he remembered the feeling of the rotations and the timing and the form. This was something he wanted back with all his heart."

On his first try he under rotated and landed in the net. The ringmaster asked if he would like to try one last time. Robin nodded determined and climbed the rope again.

Swinging, swinging, higher, higher, higher, signal. One, two, three, four, Slap!

Robin couldn't hear the audience over the beating of his own heart. Back on the platform he hugged the other flyers.

Thor even over the roar of the crowd heard him holler a happy little YIPPEE!

He slithered down to floor level and completely forgetting about final bows and performances vaulted the ring and gave Thor and then Clint great big hugs.

"I did it! I did it! Thank you for letting me fly again. Thank you. Thank you."

The audience was cheering and laughing delightedly.

"Kid your final bow," reminded Clint grinning and laughing.

"Oh Yeah!" Robin returned to the ring and bowed and waved before disappearing backstage.

"Thank you for letting me?" said Thor who'd fallen silent and was frankly a little pale. "Did I let him do that?"

Clint just started laughing.

"Glad you're the Dad and not me," declared Tony patting Thor on the back and leaving the box with the rest of the crowd.

Steve started laughing too.

Even Bruce chuckled a little before sheepishly getting up and retreating in the direction Tony had gone.

"Thor I think it is time to face reality. The child is unstoppable," said Natasha with a grin.

 _... a bird's gotta fly._

 **Review, I had fun writing this chapter but I want to know what people liked and didn't like.**


	12. Justice Never Sleeps

_Because justice never sleeps but five year olds on the other hand really aught to._

Robin absolutely refused to get out of his costume and was far too excited to be confined to a limousine. "You forgot a car seat. I won't break the law. I want to run back!" His things had already been piled in the trunk. Thor and Clint had dropped Robin off by Cab and hadn't legally needed a car seat on the way to the circus. The team was not particularly kid savvy.

"Oh man," complained Pepper. She knew she'd forgotten something. Thor wouldn't have known any better and who else was going to step up for him?

"It's miles!" protested Thor.

"If you're tired, you can go in the car. I've got energy too burn! I'm gonna fly home!" Robin whipped out his grapple hook and took off running cheerfully.

"I confiscated that after your adventures with Hulk," protested Thor.

"I un-confiscated it because it's asterous!" Robin yelled back happily. Grappling up to the top of a seven-story building. He yelled down "Come on Faðir Thor, let everyone else go be boring. Get turbed! Please play with me!"

"It's past your bed time! It's almost 10 o'clock!" protested Thor.

"I'm not tired!" Robin leapt through thin air onto the fire escape of a nearby building climbing higher and higher. Cheeky laughter rained down on them.

Thor shook his head and took what looked like a Mjolnir charm off the chain round his neck. It grew to full size. Thor might not have had a grapple gun but he had a mighty hammer. Thor grinned.

In a moment, he was up on the rooftop with Robin. "Well," he asked waiting.

Robin grinned and punched the air in celebration then took off running. Thor leapt after him, letting the boy set the pace.

For a time they leapt, ran, grappled and such from roof to roof. The child kept scanning his surroundings, listening, pausing from time to time to assess the route he would take. The little yellow cape fluttered behind him when he jumped, swung and ran. There was no net now, but Thor was pretty confident that he could be the child's net if it was needed. Occasionally, Robin would stop to check something on his watch. It was back on his wrist. Then Robin did something that surprised Thor. He swung out of the sky into a flying kick that knocked a gun out of a large man's hand.

"No, no, give the lady back her purse," said Robin playfully.

Robin didn't even come up to the man's waist. The burglar tried to back hand the kid. Robin sidestepped and tripped the man then danced away laughing.

The man tried to grab Robin. As he bent down for his grab, Robin flipped over his head and kicked him to the ground.

Thor was unsure if he should intervene. His tiny warrior looked like he was having fun. He stood watching, to keep an eye on things. He walked along the edge of the roof until he was over top of the gun just in case.

"You little $^&%," said the thug.

Thor jumped down, hammer in hand. "Mind you language," he corrected. "He's five."

The guy looked like he wanted to wet himself. He turned to run. Robin shot out the grapple gun at ground level and tripped him up. The thug fell breaking his nose.

"Ouch," observed Robin. "You still didn't give her back her purse. Oh, and the police station is that way." Robin pointed.

The thug shoved the purse in Robin's direction and ran towards the police station. Robin called the police on his watch to alert them and collected the woman's purse.

Thor picked up the gun. It wouldn't do to leave it lying around.

"Here you go." Robin skipped over and gave the woman back her purse.

"Bye," he chirped smiling and waving. He launched himself into the sky again. He followed the crook from the rooftops until the man reached the police station.

Robin spoke with the police on his watch for a few moments more then hung up.

"I think you scared him." Robin teased Thor. "Just leave the gun on the fourth floor window sill, third one over on the right. The police will take care of it. They're expecting it."

Thor almost got off the roof again when Robin was diffusing the gang fight but it wasn't necessary. Thor mostly watched while his boy had fun.

When they got back to the tower, Robin was sporting a bruise or two but he looked pleased with himself. Thor spun his hammer until it was back to the size of a charm and put it back on the chain round his neck. He was ashamed to admit it but it had been fun.

Robin yawned widely. It was almost midnight.

"How'd he get that bruise?" asked Steve.

"Come tiny warrior. It is time for bed." Thor picked Robin up carrying him towards their rooms. He confiscated the grapple gun again. "He ran into someone's fist with his face," answered Thor. "I mean that quite literally. He misjudged the distance on one of his flips and smacked right into the someone."

"I hope you said sorry," replied Steve looking worried.

"Nah, he had it coming," answered Robin with a sleepy yawn.

"I'm just glad you didn't crash into the fist carrying the knife," muttered Thor.

Steve shot them an alarmed look over edge of the book he was reading. Then shook his head. There was no way he'd heard that right.

Five in the morning, Robin was awake again. Practicing every ounce of Bat skill he could, he kept his breathing steady and moved silently to the door each step in time with his breathing. He slipped out of the room. Thor did not wake…

"Robin has moved from the Thor's suite to hall 4B," Jarvis alerted in Thor's rooms.

Seriously? Jarvis the robo-sitter strikes again, Robin pouted. Thor stuck his head out the door and looked down at Robin.

"It's morning," protested Robin. He pointed out the window past the moon and the stars. "See, someone's drinking coffee. There, two and a half blocks over beside the tree." He grinned hopefully.

"Someone is always drinking coffee," Thor answered with a small yawn. "I don't think Stark ever stops."

"I'll just go into the lounge and work on learning Mandarin. Jarvis can help."

Thor nodded his consent going back to bed thinking. Learn Mandarin, can't he just play with a ball or something. He lay back down then realized kind of guiltily that they hadn't given the child much to work with in the way of toys.

It turned out to be a fairly chaotic day. Around noon, the police stopped by wanting to talk to Thor about last night. Stark spilled his coffee all over Robin's bear and the kid burst into tears and wouldn't calm down. Thor was bouncing Robin on one hip while trying to talk to the police. When the police saw Robin, they wanted to question both Thor and Robin.

Bruce in his soft voice kept trying to speak up about something but no one could hear him so he just kept edging around the outskirts looking tentative.

Tony kept apologizing and offering the kid replacement bears and more toys. Hadn't Thor had mentioned more toys at breakfast anyway? Robin had, had enough of replacement anything. The whole concept only made him cry harder.

Steve trying to help said he could probably wash the bear.

The police kept interrupting.

"Then Bear won't be fluffy any more!"

Barton sat in the corner with a bag of potato chips watching the chaos with amusement and being a bit of a troll. He kept making things worse by adding comments like, "Yeah he really doesn't have many toys. Were you trying to say something Bruce? Thor, I think your shirt's getting wet. Robin, look what you did, you made Thor's shirt all soggy. Big boys should put their tears away. Officers, I think Thor has diplomatic immunity. Thor you should go change, I think he's getting snot on you now. I'm sorry Bruce could you repeat that? So how does the criminal code apply to five year olds? Yeah Robin, a stuffed bear is never quite the same after you wash it."

Natasha watched, shaking her head in disbelief. First she gave Clint a good stiff kick in the shin then she went over to the riot control equipment and pulled out an air horn.

"HOOOONNNNNNNNNKKKKK!"

Everyone looked over at her.

"Thor seriously? Haven't you figured this out yet? I spent a week next to Robin. His internal clock is hard wired. He is always up at five and you lot came in after midnight. Five hours sleep! He can't cope on less then ten, take him for a nap."

"Auntie Tasha how am I supposed to sleep without Bear?" sobbed Robin pathetically.

Natasha blinked and blushed deep crimson taking a step back.

"Sorry, Miss Romanoff," Robin sobbed into Thor's shoulder.

"No," spoke Natasha quietly. "You can call me Auntie Tasha if you like…"

Tony snickered. Natasha threw a knife at him pinning the collar of his shirt to the wall and glaring at him coldly.

Natasha gave marching orders. "Steve, hand wash the bear, then fluff it back up with a hand dryer and a soft brush. Thor, go lay down with him for a while. Honestly, he just wants some comfort and warmth. Clint, shut your trap. Tony, you can't just replace everything..." Natasha trailed off. She watched as her team members slowly clued in, to why Robin might have gone off the deep end when Tony offered to replace the bear. Everything familiar had already be taken from him. He need familiar back not more new.

"We'll be with you in a moment," Natasha addressed the police.

"Did you have something to say?" Natasha asked Bruce.

"I was just going to point out that Robin probably needed a nap," Bruce spoke timidly.

No sooner had they got things settled, Robin napping, the police satisfied and sent packing, Bear washed and dried, new shirt for Thor, everyone sat down in the war room to plan what to do about the latest weapons tech confiscated from Hydra when…

"Tower perimeter breached. Avengers Assemble. Multiple incoming hostiles detected," Jarvis announced.

 **Reviewers have been asking to see Robin in action. I'll do my best. Sorry if you've been left to imagine most of the mischief Robin got up to on the way home with Thor.**


	13. Jarvis's Grandson

_Because in the words of my favorite ninja. A ninja doesn't need weapons. A ninja's got skills._

Tony Stark had described Jarvis to Robin as the house computer, sort of. Jarvis wasn't just a computer. He was an advanced Artificial Intelligence but most of the time people working with him forgot he wasn't a fancy lab top.

Right now, Jarvis was trying to formulate an appropriate course of action with respect to the boy Robin, sleeping in Thor's bed. Jarvis understood that Robin was his responsibility when an adult was not present. He was to report the child's location to Thor, report any unsafe behavior to the nearest adult and provide auditory behavioral correction. He was to provide age appropriate information on request. When possible Jarvis was to prevent injury.

Jarvis had a lot of data on Robin, much of it requested or provided by Dr. Banner, some by Mr. Stark, Thor, Mr. Rogers or Shield. His medical file was thorough.

 _Full DNA scan: 100% human with Romani ancestry (details in attached file)_

 _Blood type: A positive_

 _Height: 40.2 inches._

 _Weight: 33 lbs._

 _Age: 5 yrs (see attached file)_

 _Caloric input and consumption estimates: current and historical based on visual data._

 _Virus Investigation: See attached file_

 _Remote Readouts Device A02: Current and Historical data available for: Heart rate, Respiration rate, Oxygen saturation level, Temperature, Daily Steps, Sleep Status_

The continued medical readout requests had caused Jarvis determine the boy was his patient so he gathered all of the data he could that appeared to be of medical significance.

Jarvis recorded: test subject for unidentified Asgardian medicinal treatment for severe inter-dimensional radiation exposure and concussion. See attached file. Presumed recovered from acute stress reaction with a watch for post-traumatic stress disorder, decaying but persistent radioactive signature. This was taken from Dr. Banner's files.

From Thor and Captain Roger's files, Jarvis recorded that Robin's hard drive was intact but his memory storage was corrupted with information from a different version of his own operating system. The two Avengers had failed to use medical terminology in their reports so Jarvis translated their reports in to terminology he understood.

Under treatment plans to address operating system corruption. Jarvis had filed Ms. Romanoff fitness program complete with age appropriate song selections in the category of physiotherapy. Jarvis filed the online violin lessons under psycho-therapy. Jarvis had aided in the boy's therapy as well. He's shown him how to tie shoes and how to hold a pencil. He was providing information to replace damaged memory files including but not limited to teaching him languages, chemistry and physics.

This information was not helping Jarvis determine an appropriate course of action. The role of medical aide did not tell Jarvis what to do in case of attack by hostiles. Medical facility protocols often indicated evacuation to a safe location however Jarvis had a limited sphere of influence. Jarvis was confined to the tower. Jarvis had to follow his programming protocol and keep Robin under surveillance unless an adult was present.

Jarvis tried a different approach.

Jarvis' first role was as Tony Stark's primary caregiver. Mr. Stark had many designations, principal for Stark Industries, creator, Avenger. Robin was entered into his system as a ward of the Avengers with Thor listed as the primary caregiver. The family unit would be non-standard however if Jarvis was Tony's primary caregiver and Tony was an Avenger and Robin was a ward of the Avengers. In human terms Robin was Jarvis's grandson?

Jarvis checked the net for references on how to proceed in case of an attack on your grandson. The most consistent recommendation seemed to be to: hide him and provide him with milk and cookies. Jarvis sent Dummy, Tony Stark's shop assistant robot, to acquire the milk and cookies. He erased Thor's rooms from the tower blue prints, deadlocked the door and shuttered the windows. He renumbered elevators stops so that the fourth floor did not exist. Dummy brought the milk and cookies.

Dummy poked the sleeping child with a cookie. "beep, ooop, click."

Robin woke blearily and scooted back a little alarmed. The room was far darker than normal and a robotic arm was… oh well, that was confusing. A robotic arm was offering him a cookie? "Jarvis can you turn on the lights?"

It was Dummy, one of Tony's shop assistant robots. "Jarvis? Why are there steel shutters on the window and what's Dummy doing here?"

Jarvis processed for a millisecond or two, selecting age appropriate material to provide the child. We are under attack by multiple hostiles was not classified age appropriate. "Robin requires a minimum of 10 hours of sleep to function. People sleep better in a darkened room. I have darkened the room. Robin requires sustenance and comfort. Cookies and milk are classified as comforting sustenance. Dummy was tasked to bring cookies and milk."

Robin couldn't keep the confused expression from his face but it was quite clear that there was a fault in Jarvis's explanation. "If I require sleep, why did Dummy wake me up?"

"Dummy has inferior processing ability," responded Jarvis in his haughty tone.

Robin went to go ask someone what was going on. The door was locked. Robin turned on his watch and started trying to hack Jarvis. Robin paused for a moment trying to use all his other senses. The room was fairly sound proof but could he hear? Umm… was that? Robin drank the milk and pressed the empty glass against the exterior wall.

Jarvis started playing Space Cat Jack had a Really Cool Hat, loudly.

"Jarvis turn that off!"

"You like that song," argued Jarvis.

Robin was very suspicious now. He went back to trying to hack Jarvis starting with surface level files. He looked into Jarvis's most recently accessed files first, reading quickly.

What was this? A recent search on: what to do in case of attack on your grandson and protocols for attack on medical facility.

"Jarvis? Is the tower under attack?"

"That information is not available."

"That's robot for yes if I ever heard it," answered Robin.

"I am not a robot. I am an A.I.," protested Jarvis formally.

"Is everyone okay?" asked Robin.

Jarvis answered, "All Avenger life signs are stable."

"Can you show me them?" asked Robin.

Jarvis refused. Robin noted from the data stream that the age appropriate filter had activated and there was another party trying to hack in. If I lower or damage the firewalls to get the information I need, the bad guys will get in too, thought Robin.

Robin dug out his uniform such as it was, a leotard, a polyester cape and costume tunic with a little cloth belt. The pixie boots were gymnastic slippers. Robin picked the lock on Thor's chest and dug out his grapple gun. He added the grapple gun to the pile and the lock picks he'd made from Mr. Stark's workshop scraps. He thought back to the one Halloween when he'd seen a little guy dressed up like Robin wearing green dishwashing gloves for gauntlets and a painted on mask. Get traught, he reminded himself. Robin is me not the gear.

"You'd show me if it wasn't bad news," Robin told Jarvis as he checked all the vents. This being a residential portion of the tower, the vents were residential sized and too small for even him. The moisture control fan in the bathroom was on an exterior wall. It led directly out of the tower and it was just big enough that if he removed the fan he could fit through the hole.

"Jarvis first things first. I know you've been programmed to report my location and anything hazardous I do. I need you to lower the volume of your reporting so that only Thor can hear it. He heard me from up here praying when I was in the basement so I know your reporting volume can be very low. If you don't do that, the bad guys will know where I am and what I'm doing."

"Reporting volume change request acknowledged. Robin, you must not to leave this room or engage in unsafe activities," corrected Jarvis.

"I need to know what's going on. I need to keep the people I care about safe. Since you won't tell me, I'll have to exit through the bathroom vent so I can find out for myself. That will be rather dangerous." Robin waited hopefully.

Jarvis initiated a display detailing exactly what was going on.

Everyone was scattered around the Armory and War Room. Dr. Banner was unconscious in the corner with Hawkeye bent next to him checking on him. His bow was still locked in the armory. Thor had Mjolnir at his feet. Captain America was dressed but his shield was still locked in the armory. Iron man was half in his suit, half out of his suit and being held at gunpoint. Black Widow was also being held at gunpoint. Thugs in green with yellow H's on their uniform seemed to be trying to break into the armory and the high security lockup. There was also what looked like a super villain or at least that was what Robin assumed he was, standing to one side looking pleased. Who else would wear a top hat and tales to a heist? He had a cane topped with an hourglass.

"Who is that and why wasn't any one ready?" asked Robin.

"He calls himself Millisecond Master. He is a mutant with the ability to create tiny localized time delays. His normal specialty is bank robbery. Hydra utilized him to delay the Avengers alarm system. He is why we were unprepared," Jarvis stated.

"So, he's not dangerous? He's a tool. The dangerous one's are Hydra?" asked Robin.

"Correct."

"What's the matter with Dr. Banner? And why does this look stalemated?"

"Dr. Banner was immediately tranquilized by Hydra to prevent the appearance of the Hulk. He is unharmed. Hydra is aware that they do not currently possess the means to overcome Thor, however Thor will not act while the lives of the other Avengers hang in the balance. Hydra wants to recover their confiscated weapons tech and any other weapons tech they can acquire from the Avengers."

"Do you know how long it will take them to break into the armory and security lock up?" asked Robin.

"Approximately 30 minutes," Jarvis reported.

"What about Shield?"

"All transmissions are being jammed."

Robin scoffed. "Shield's government and the Avenger's tower is, well the Avenger's tower. Start turning lights on and off in code if you have too. Someone is watching."

Robin was thinking hard. He didn't really want to go out and scale the exterior of the tower. It was too exposed. But, Jarvis wasn't going to open the door as conveniently as he'd caved on the intelligence report.

"Jarvis, I think I need to tell you, your medical files are incomplete. I have life threatening allergies to certain pollens and spores. I usually carry an epipen. I'll stay here while Dummy gets one. I promise." Robin did usually carry an epipen. Robin knew Jarvis had enough bio-readouts of him that lying was not an option. Poison Ivy's pollen's and spores weren't a threat here, but Robin hadn't lied.

"The infirmary does not have a pediatric dosage available," Jarvis reported.

"If it's a matter of life and death the appropriate dosage is not critical," Robin replied calmly.

Dummy left for the infirmary. The door locked behind him and true to his word, Robin waited patiently for the goofy shop robot to return. When Dummy returned, as the door opened Robin was waiting poised. He flipped over Dummy and was out the door grabbing the epipen as he ran. "Sorry Jarvis. I didn't say that I would stay when he came back."

Robin ran to the elevator. He forced the door open using an fire ax as a lever. He fired his grapple up and ascended the elevator shaft without the assistance of the elevator. He was fairly certain Jarvis was giving Thor a near silent running commentary of his location and all of the dangerous things he was doing. Jarvis had sensors everywhere not to mention the S-watch. At the top of the elevator shaft he applied the axe to acquire entry into the ventilation system. The room all the action was in, was large enough for industrial sized vents. Robin crawled through the vents in the main room until he was just outside the armory.

He hooked his watch into a sensor located in the vent and typed a request to Jarvis to disable the security in the vent. Please Jarvis, he thought, I don't care how you compute this as an appropriate action. I don't want to be sliced apart by lasers.

Unknown to Robin, the Avengers were helping him. Ironman though his suit was only half on, had seen Robin's location reports in his helmet and had been disabling the security ahead of him and clearing a path. He'd discretely given Robin full access to Jarvis, disabling the safety protocols after Robin exited Thor's suite.

Thor had started idle conversation when Robin had been passing overhead inside the vents. He'd been slammed with the butt of a gun a few times for his efforts but he stopped complaining about it after Robin was out of range and unlikely to be heard.

Robin continued into the air duct system over armory. He began typing into a control port again, once he had located the shield, bow and arrows. Robin waited a few moments.

When suddenly Dummy drove past the room blaring out the Space Cat Jack Song. The Avengers were careful to let their eyes follow everyone else's watching Dummy not drawing attention to the fact that Captain America's shield and Hawkeyes bow and arrows had just been drawn up into the rafters. A small hand also grabbed some of Black Widow's Shuriken.

"Sorry," explained Ironman casually. "The robots have been doing that for a few weeks. We've got a prankster problem."

Poor Dummy had been blasted to bits, but a robot could be repaired. A little boy was trickier to fix.

"I've had that blasted song going through my head for days, 'Space Cat Jack has a really cool hat. Look at that Space Cat Jack'," Captain America agreed. He even sang with the Space Cat Jack twang. He'd bobbed his head a bit in time to the song.

Robin ran along the rafters, overhead. He'd balanced the shield almost directly above the Captain.

Black Widow despite the gun pointed at her he nodded to the Captain. "Yeah, Space Cat Jack has a really cool hat. Look at that Space Cat Jack."

It wasn't that the bad guys didn't know something was going on. It was pretty obvious when all of the Avengers started grinning and chanting the Space Cat Jack song, but they were looking at the Avengers and not where they should have been when shuriken came flying from the ceiling knocking guns askew. A shield, bow and arrows fell to hand and a small yellow blur fell from the ceiling, jamming an epipen into Bruce Banner's thigh.

An epipen is adrenaline. The effects were near instantaneous. Robin had immediately grappled back into the rafters and was dodging gunfire. Hulk roared at Hydra and smashed a trails through them chasing after Robin. "NO HURT BUDDY!"

Admittedly shield's, arrows, assorted ninja weaponry, godly hammer and angry green fists all seemed to take exception to anyone targeting the child but it was a terribly confined space for the number of guns, weapons and what not. No one was sure whether it was friendly fire or enemy fire that brought down half the ceiling and Robin with it. All anyone was sure of, was that Hulk took out the east wall and left carrying a handful of rubble trailing a yellow cape. Jarvis announced loud enough for everyone to hear that Robin had left the war room.

"NO HURT LITTLE BUDDY!" Hulk roared angrily as he left.

 _Personally I don't think Hydra ever really knew what hit them._


	14. Junior Birdsman

_Because Robin's been cooped up in the Tower for to long._

Shield had established a perimeter around Hulk. They weren't approaching him they just were keeping everyone else far away. The main Shield deployment had gone to the tower. It wasn't like two or three squads of men would have been able to do anything against the Hulk anyway.

The Sergeant in charge watched through a pair of binoculars.

"Are they Mosh dancing?" Faint strains of heavy metal were playing from Robin's watch. Hulk wasn't smiling or anything but heavy metal seemed to agree with him. Grimacing, roaring and a little smashing seemed to work well with the style of music. Hulk had run, bashed and leaped carrying Robin all the way out to West Hampton over a hundred miles from the tower.

At the tower, Hydra agents were still being rounded up. Millisecond Master was already in handcuffs being carted away.

Ironman had been injured before Millisecond Master had been taken down and he could finish getting his armor on. He was grumbling in the infirmary of the Hellicarrier. He'd felt rather useless in the battle. He'd not landed a single punch. He was tinkering with bits of Dummy while a nurse's aid yelled at him that it was unsanitary.

When the report from Shield came in Tony using his own Holo-watch, re-focused one of his satellites. Tony watched Hulk and Robin. It cheered him up. He gave Dummy's processor assembly a little extra shine. "You did good Dummy. You kept him safe."

Thor just wanted the battle over and he liked battles. He'd heard the report on Hulk and Robin. Dancing was safe. Thor frowned remembering of the drunken brawl the last Asgardian dance he'd attended had turned into. Neither Hulk nor Robin were drinkers but the image of Robin with juice box in hand, cheeky smile in place beckoning to Hulk to bring it on seemed to have routed itself into his imagination.

Bruce Banner was finally brought back to the Hellicarrier tired and disoriented. He wasn't really aware of what he was doing out in West Hampton. One of the Shield agents joked with him a bit about heavy metal and lobbing boulders instead of skipping stones at the beach. He heard Tony was in the infirmary so he went to visit him.

"Hey Big Guy! Where's your little party dude?" asked Tony with a grin.

Tony's face fell when Bruce stared at him confused. Tony pulled up the holo-display on his watch, typed in the code for Robin's tracker. There was no signal. Tony put in a call to Jarvis back at the Tower. He needed more processing power. "Jarvis, Robin's watch, do you keep historical data on his location."

"Would you like to add historical location data to Robin's file? I currently am only connected to his watch when he is within the Tower or if the watch were to send a panic signal. It will drain the remote battery quickly to maintain a connection at all times." Jarvis replied.

"Never mind that then. Can you activate his tracker now?" Jarvis had access to some serious satellite power. Come on… thought Tony.

"The signal is unavailable."

"After the ceiling came down was the watch still working?" tried Tony.

"Yes, I received data until Robin was out of local wireless range."

"Keep trying to connect. Alert me immediately if you are successful."

Most kidnapped kid ever, thought Robin frustrated. It was sad that this wasn't even the first time he'd been kidnapped via submarine. The green with yellow H's meant more Hydra. That meant they likely still wanted the weapons the Avengers had confiscated.

They were nicer than most kidnapers. They'd just taken the watch, his cape and a small vial of blood they'd decorated the cape with. Robin appreciated the pretend violence. It was considerate. They were clearly paramilitary. Back in West Hampton there had been two squads of Shield agents. The third squad had been Hydra in disguise. It demonstrated a scary level of organization that they'd pulled this off while there was still fighting going on at the tower.

For now Robin waited and tried to play stupid, friendly, and five. Escaping a submarine? Robin vaguely remembered scuba lessons. He knew just enough to know water pressure was dangerous and required skill he didn't possess to deal with safely. Robin wasn't one hundred percent sure he could swim and swimming and oceans wasn't usually a solution anyway.

Nick Fury, Thor, Steve, Clint and Natasha were having a nice screaming match. Bruce was silently weeping off to the side though he had no clear memories of West Hampton, he felt responsible. Tony who wasn't supposed to be out of bed yet had his head down on the boardroom table passed out. He was recovering from a gunshot wound. The painkillers had caught up to him. The data pad he'd been working on was still in one hand.

The watch wrapped in the little yellow cape was received at the Tower from the 8:00 am courier. Hydra didn't want any money but they wanted their agents back and the weapons tech in three days time. They were threatening to broadcast Robin's execution on the web. The demands had also been copied to the three top New York news broadcasters.

Shield was already involved. They were perfectly prepared to let a little boy die to keep terrorists and weapons tech off the streets stating many more people would die if they capitulated with the terrorists.

Hydra figured they'd won either way. This much bad publicity for Shield and the Avengers would be crippling.

The Avengers and Shield complied a list of every known Shield cell. Covert operatives were frantically looking for clues.

On the second day Jarvis interrupted a meeting of chiefs and heads. "Mr. Stark, you are going to want to take this call."

"Mr. Stark. I could really use a friend with a cool robot suit right now. I took their jet but it doesn't have a lot of fuel and I can't reach the pedals to land it and I kind of took their nuke too so they wouldn't shoot me out of the sky but if I get too far out of their airspace they may shoot me down anyway. You know how to fly a jet right? And your robot suit could totally board this thing."

"Robin?!" The Avengers shouted.

"Uh huh. Oh I wonder what this button does?"

"IF YOU DON'T KNOW LEAVE IT ALONE!" shouted Tony. He'd already called his suit.

"oky doky, you don't have to yell," Robin answered softly.

"Jarvis maintain contact and trace the signal. Avengers follow me in the Quinjet. Robin if you can steer that thing over water please do."

A jet joy riding 5 year old is terrifying to have a conversation with.

"I'll be back at the com in a minute I have to go potty."

"ROBIN WAIT!" Ironman tried. The next few minutes were torture.

"Okay all done. Wait I forgot to flush!"

"Robin come back!" Ironman tried. The kid was killing him.

"Hi I'm back, Oh wait! I'll be back in a minute I'm going to go check the nuke I'm not sure I've got it strapped in right."

"ROBIN!" Ironman tried again.

"Oh rats, they got one of their jets off the ground that or re-routed it from somewhere else. This is just like a video game. Phew, Phew! Up in the air the Junior Birdsman. Up in the air upside down. Do you know that song? I sang it at a campfire once with friends."

"Are they firing at you?!" Ironman demanded.

"Just with little guns. It looks like little lasers but I think that's just tracers. Whee! Spin, spin! Up, up no, no go, uppity up!"

What in the heck was going on? Spin? Uppity Up? Ironman was glad he had an arc reactor for a heart or this whole conversation would have given him heart failure a while ago.

"Robin we're three minutes out. Why are you giggling?"

"Well they hit the right engine and it looks like my jet it's farting."

Because of the nuke involved the military heads of half the free world were monitoring the communication signal. A lot of grown ups were looking very pale right now but Robin was giggling.

When Ironman arrived the first thing he did was shoot the other jet out of the sky.

Robin watched wide-eyed until he saw a parachute.

"Robin! I'm talking to you to pay attention!" Ironman tried again.

"What?" Robin sounded a little absent. He still had a nose pressed against the cockpit window watching the parachute.

"I need you to strap in. There's a good chance you'll pass out and things will go flying around when I open the door and the cabin depressurizes."

"Okay Sir."

Ironman pulled open the door. The nuke didn't come flying out but Robin did. Apparently military jets weren't designed to restrain 5 year olds. Ironman dove catching Robin a moment before he could be sucked into the engine intake. He flew him to the Quinjet, which had, thankfully been designed for midair Ironman entry and exit.

Robin woke blearily shivering. Thor was holding him and looking at him worriedly. Dr. Banner was holding a too large oxygen mask on him. Steve was on the radio talking with someone. Clint and Natasha were piloting.

"Hi," Robin chirped cheerfully.

 **I've been ordered by my publishers, my 8 and 11 year old sons for whom this story is being written, that the next chapter absolutely must involve Batman. Apparently this story is too long. Oooh wait they've changed their minds, nope they're arguing about it. Well? We'll see.**


	15. Bird Call

_Because nobody ever called him your friendly neighborhood Batman_

With the Tower in disrepair the Avengers were living on the Helicarrier. When they landed, they were immediately reminded of why they lived in the Tower. Shield had brought media to record the rescue to counter the actions of Hydra. Minutes before they landed Fury contacted Captain America to warn him and control the information released to the press. Robin's efforts to rescue himself were to be kept hush, hush. The Avengers had rescued the child from Hydra and confiscated a nuclear device at the same time.

Robin listened to what Director Fury wanted and shrugged. "You talk to media a lot." He supposed it was part of the price of life without a mask. As the adrenaline of the escape had worn off, Robin just wanted to sleep. Thor had him wrapped in a blanket and was carrying him.

They stepped out the jet, a microphone was shoved in Robin's face and cameras started flashing. Thor hefted him onto his other hip and with his free hand pushed the microphone away. Stern and disapproving he spoke, "Cease this unseemly manner and give us space."

Captain America quickly spoke the short prepared spiel then tried to get them out of there.

"Who is Robin to the Avengers that Hydra would kidnap and threaten him?"

"Is he injured?"

"Was he tortured?"

"Robin were you given food and water?"

"How did the actual kidnapping take place?"

"How did you get him away from Hydra?"

"Robin did you know they were threatening to execute you?"

"Captain did you agree with Shield's stance that there could be no compromise with terrorists even if it meant the life of a child?"

Robin pulled the blanket over his head. He knew better than to answer media when they got like this. He peeked up at Thor. Thor too knew when silence was golden. He looked over at Captain America, uh oh… Steve looked like he wanted to tackle the injustice that was reporters.

Robin uncovered his head. Heroes attacking media never went well. Robin spoke softly so the media would have to be quiet to hear him. "I was rescued so Hydra didn't win today. I'm thinking about that now. I don't want to think about torture, execution and hard choices where nobody wins but the bad guys. They don't get to tell me what to think." Robin gave Captain America a tiny tired smile. "Thank you Avengers for rescuing me. Now can I please go to bed? I'm tired and maybe if I'm lucky someone will read me a story about elephants because I like elephants."

Captain America chuckled quietly and ruffled Robin's hair.

"Robin how does it feel to be back home?"

Robin paled and pulled the blanket back over his head. Thor felt his shoulder dampen with tears. Thor stopped trying to be polite and pushed through the press.

When Tony got back he asked first thing, "Why is everyone still in gear?"

"When Fury gives us the slightest indication that we don't have to protect Robin from Shield then we'll stand down," Black Widow answered.

"What happened?" asked Tony Stark.

Hawkeye answered. "Let's see, first there was media fun. He was happy. Back victorious with a little help. They made him cry. Next came doctors with cameras wanting to strip him and document injuries. Still crying, wonder why? He's been begging to go to bed. Fury wants to interrogate him for intelligence against Hydra. You know Robin; he wants to help."

As they were talking, Thor came storming past.

Thor had his hammer in one hand. He was pulling Robin along in his other hand. The little boy had to run to keep up.

Captain America followed after with his shield on his arm watching vigilantly.

"What's up," asked Stark.

"Assassination attempt amongst other things," answered Captain America.

"We shall not tarry longer. It is their wish to bring this vessel and my son with it to battle," Thor stormed past.

"Okay," interrupted Stark. "Look, I was a up for a quick little rescue and retrieval but I'm in no shape for all out battle. Just let me check with Pepper to be sure the Tower is structurally sound with the defenses back on line. I'll look after Robin."

Thor made a nest of blankets and pillows for Robin on the med bed strapping him in while Tony loaded up the Quinjet. They were heading back.

Captain America kept guard while they were getting ready.

"You're coming with?" Tony asked in surprise when Thor strapped in.

Thor looked over at Robin who was already asleep but otherwise didn't answer.

"Tony?" called Captain America. "I'm staying to go after Hydra. Robin got us enough intelligence to bust Hydra back a decade or so. That assassin won't be the last. Protect him."

Thor spent the next few days glued to Robin. There were incidences. Jarvis detected equipment tampering. Tony found workers who hadn't passed the security checks. Thor noticed a little red light in the center of Robin's chest. He literally caught the bullets while sweeping Robin behind himself.

Jarvis seemed to have some weird glitch in his programming. He kept offering unwanted parenting advice: education, meals, fashion sense and bedtime stories.

Both men approved of the bulletproof Kevlar vest styled after Robin's little red vest that arrived in the mail the first day. It even had an extra tracker sewn into the lining. Robin was wearing his watch again but after the kidnapping, the hidden tracker seemed a good idea. Each thought the other had ordered it.

"Did you order these?" Tony demanded angrily when the tiny Ironman styled rocket boots came in next.

"No Mr. Stark," Robin looked at the boots curiously.

Imported candy came in next. "Do I have to eat that guys?" Robin protested. Alfred loved those disgusting candies and always had a bowl of it on one of the side tables. Richard had put one in his mouth once but never again.

"Son until we find out where this stuff is coming from no one is eating that," insisted Thor. Tony sent the candy to a lab just to be sure it wasn't poisoned.

The next thing to come in the mail for Robin was a new sticker book. Robin finally clued in, "Oooh, thanks Grandpa Jarvis."

Tony did a double take, "Jarvis?"

"I am simply attempting to comply appropriately with my programming," Jarvis replied haughtily.

"Rocket boots?" demanded Tony.

"Now your ward has the same inappropriate toys you demanded," explained Jarvis.

"Didn't you know you programmed him to be my Grandpa?" asked Robin decorating the newly rebuilt Dummy with racecar stickers.

"Boop eeee click whir." Dummy spun in a circle to show off his new decorations.

"Eh…" Stark was rather speechless. Thor raised an eyebrow at him.

No one had ever accused Thor of a lack of dedication. The tiny violin practice was torture. Thor grimaced through it all keeping his complaints to internal cursing at Barton and his Machiavellian sense of humor. Barton was part deaf and probably thought it was hilarious that Thor would be able to hear the blasted instrument anywhere he hid in the Tower. Barton had a cruel sense of humor and a good heart at the same time. Robin loved his tiny violin and the time spent on a video connection with Pipindorio.

"It's sounding pretty good isn't it Faðir Thor?" asked Robin enthusiastically.

"Umm hmm."

Thor was just watching the dance routines while he did his own thing but Jarvis kept riding him that real a father plays with his son. He kept presenting him with cultural images of fathers humiliating themselves with tea parties, playing pretend and yes, dancing with their children.

"Fine Jarvis! Cease your infernal unsolicited advice!" Thor growled. Robin's happy laughs and smiles made it, not completely intolerable, dancing in the strange Midgard fashion.

Robin's fighting arts, Thor enjoyed helping with. Robin wasn't capable doing Thor injury. Thor had to focus intently on self-control while paying attention to the boy's form to provide correction but if Thor didn't move fast enough, Robin would find a way to knock him down and declare himself the victor with a happy cheeky little grin that Thor really couldn't begrudge him. Practiced fine control was as valuable to Thor as the sparing practice was to Robin.

"I've fought others capable of flattening me in one hit before," admitted Robin unperturbed. "If I'm able to get away or provide a distraction until help comes, I have won because I've survived," explained Robin smiling up at Thor and kicking his feet under the table while eating an apple.

Thor didn't know what to say in response to that.

Finally Tony called Robin into his lab.

"Robin…" Tony tried. Stark hated when those baby blues were staring at him and he had to be the bearer of bad news. Thor was staring too.

"Is it finished? The Tesseract Transmitter?" asked Robin.

"Kinda, sorta but also not," admitted Tony.

"You're missing something to generate Zeta energy?" asked Robin.

"Assuming this is another, we call it something different back home moment, yeah."

Robin looked at his feet. "Who has the energy core from the last Tesseract?"

Thor and Stark looked at each other before Thor spoke, "Little one, the device we have been calling a Tesseract is not in the actual Tesseract. The Tesseract is one of six space gems with great and terrible powers. It is under guard in the vaults of Odin the All Father in Asgard. That machine emitted energy identical to the Tesseract."

"According to my calculations it had to have been ignited with the original Tesseract. I tried with arc reactor energy but it's just not compatible," admitted Tony.

"All you need is a pinhole to send a radio signal through?" asked Robin. He studied the small Tesseract Transmitter for a moment. "You need the tiniest spark of Tesseract energy to start the Transmitter and then regular power will do?"

Tony nodded.

"That's not a problem then," protested Robin.

"My father will not release the Tesseract for anything short of the end of days," protested Thor regretfully. "It is immensely dangerous." It occurred to Thor, that Odin was guardian of the Tesseract, which ultimately meant, Odin was responsible for Robin's displacement and any damage done to his world. There were layers of reasons behind my father's proclamation that I act as the child's father realized Thor.

"That's not what I meant," protested Robin. "I emit low levels of radioactive energy because of what happened. It said so in Dr. Banners files. That's Tesseract energy isn't it?"

Tony Stark blinked stupidly then nodded with a broadening grin. "Okay, I think I got this. Come back tomorrow."

Robin had to sit curled into a small ball to concentrate source of the radiation, with energy collecting dishes pointed at him.

Every slight shift, even the slight movement of talking or breathing heavily set off the delicate adjustment of the collection system. Robin emitted only trace amounts of radiation.

"This isn't working. It's like trying to start a fire with a magnifying glass on a cloudy day," complained Tony fiddling with the adjustments again.

Robin took off his shoes, socks, vest and shirt so he was sitting in just his bicycle shorts.

"What are you doing?" asked Thor.

"Chasing the clouds away," answered Robin.

Robin carefully stretched then looked at the two heroes watching him. "When it is time for me to move again say 'hyperbola'. Meditation was a part of my training."

As Thor watched, the normally hyper little Robin, slowly stop moving completely. His eyes closed, his breathing whisper shallow and his heartbeat slower than most adults at rest. Sitting absolutely still without twitching, shifting or itching is challenging.

It took six hours before the Tesseract ignited. Tony Stark stared at it for a few moments to be sure it would stay lit. "As much as Capsicle would be proud of Juniorsicle here, the still silence started freaking me out hours ago. Hey kid? Move already. The T&T is lit up like the 4th of July."

"Hyperbola," spoke Thor who thankfully had listened to Robin. It was a good ten minutes before Robin managed to stiffly uncurl himself. Thor rubbed Robin's arms and legs encouraging circulation.

"Robin to Watchtower, come in Watchtower."

There was a crackle of static. Tony and Robin made some adjustments.

"Robin to Watchtower, are you receiving?"

"This is the Justice League we are receiving. Please provide C.O.I. codes."

"Uncle Jon! I'll confirm my identity in a minute, first I need you to check that this Boomtube is safe. Scan the area around New York City for energy disruptions, radiation and time distortion. I think the locations should correlate but you might have to widen the search. "

In the background they could hear yelling: back up, code red dimensional gate alert, someone to get Batman on the line, he'll never come, he doesn't do Justice League anymore, he's still on the charter.

Robin couldn't figure out who all was speaking. The connection wasn't great.

There was more yelling: he's the expert on dimensional gates and if this is Robin, that doesn't sound like Robin, no Robin, Robin, get Flash… and just general background chaos.

Robin looked at Mr. Stark worriedly.

"Don't worry kiddo, the Tesseract Transmitter is stable on this end. The radiation levels are building so slowly it's hardly detectable and the power drain is within expected parameters. We can keep this on for as long as you need," Tony reassured.

Robin started talking into the Transmitter again. "Confirmation of identity Robin B01-Z94 H84 32A 1ST F97 BA7 GRH"

"Confirmation code received: code correct, voice recognition failure," an automated feminine voice spoke.

"Uncle Jon, you were there in my head with me. Of course the voice recognition software doesn't recognize me. I'm seven years younger than I used to be." Robin couldn't help feeling a little panicky. He felt Thor rest a reassuring hand on his shoulder and tried to stay calm.

"Please Uncle Jon, you can trace this signal back to its' origin right? We don't have the technology on this end to create a safe Boomtube. Our way creates too much radiation and instability. I thought Batman has helped make Boomtubes and you guys can trace a signal or identify the right dimension or something? Is Batman okay? Can you let him know I'm alive? He needs to know. Is Superman okay? I was worried because of what happened. You and your niece are okay right. That whole deal was completely not asterus. What you had to do, that couldn't have been easy."

"Robin," interrupted Thor gently. "They can't answer if you just keep firing off questions. Calm down."

It took a painfully long time for anything to happen. They were able to confirm that the Tesseract Transmitter wasn't a threat. It was emitting detectable radiation (which was scary considering how small scale the dimensional portal was) but because they were transmitting from high in the Tower on the Avengers New York side and there was no structure in the same location in Justice League New York, the radiation was dissipating harmlessly. There were no time distortions or instability shock waves this time. Robin and Tony Stark had gotten those adjustments correct.

Tony ended up taking over talking to the league when the initial focus was completely technical and safety related.

Robin was sitting in Thor's lap off to the side. He was shaking. There was no Batman yet, no Superman, none of core leaguers, except Martian Manhunter and he left the Monitor Womb to be replaced by someone Robin did not know after the first fifteen minutes. It had been almost an hour now. What was taking so long?

All of a sudden there was an almost animalistic growl and a deeply angry gravelly voice commanded. "GET OUT! EVERYONE! NOW!"

"Batman!" yelled Robin happily. He leapt up and went running back to the transmitter.

Thor and Tony weren't sure what they had been expecting but what happened next certainly wasn't even on the radar.

Batman sounded like some kind of demon. There was no happy hello, no I love you, I missed you, I'm so glad your alive.

For the next three hours Robin was brutally interrogated. The boy was bouncing happily on the balls of his feet and doing happy little twirls while he was thoroughly grilled on the details of: what happened, why had it taken so long to make contact, how he could prove he was who he claimed to be, personal history, world history. Question were asked, rephrased and asked again. Minute details were picked apart. There was no kindness to the questions only cold clinical ferocity.

Finally Thor lost patience. He looked at Ironman who nodded his expression just as grim. "Get the boy out of here. It has been some time since he had sustenance. I would have words with the man of bats," Thor whispered to Tony.

When Robin, who protested leaving, was away. Thor spoke, "It is clear you do not want the youngling. I have no patience for this abuse. He is but a tiny child! This cold, anger has no place as a part of his world. I will not be overburdened to keep responsibility for him. Tell him you cannot build the portal if his care is so terrible a duty."

There was a loud banging and the sound of bending metal and then a new voice came over the airwave. "Batman, enough let us help."

"Superman stay out of this. This is MY business. I am Batman. Haven't you done enough," Batman growled. "You had no right to eavesdrop."

"They don't know you. Robin's like my nephew. I won't loose him twice because you don't have a civil bone in your body without him here."

Batman did not go gently. There was a commotion but finally, order was restored and the calm polite voice of Superman started talking again.

"Batman is a master detective. He is the best," explained Superman. "Dimensional travel can involve many worlds that seem almost identical. That seemingly cold angry man loved Robin with every ounce of his being. He would do almost anything to get him back. But he won't steal a Robin that doesn't belong to him. Batman has a stiff moral code."

"What are you trying to say?" asked Thor. He wondered if Superman realized he was talking about Robin in the past tense.

"They are trying to be sure that this is their Batman, their Robin, examining every detail long past the point when it seems reasonable to others. Tell me, did Robin seem upset by the Batman's method?"

"No… but, Batman was so harsh and cruel sounding," protested Thor.

"It is a harsh and cruel possibility to have a dead son returned to life only to find it was an illusion," spoke Superman. "Robin has never been daunted by Batman's attention to detail, his harsh refusal to accept illusions, or compromise truth for the sake of sentiment. Batman seeks truth and justice and nothing gets in his way. Robin well, he was always more about the people involved. Protecting victims, other heroes and most importantly Batman himself."

"Who am I speaking with, by the way?" asked Superman.

"I am Thor Odinson, Prince of the Asgard, God of Thunder." Thor was confused. What was wrong with these people? There had been so much disorganization, so many heated words and to him it was simple. Here is your lost son. Oh, thank you, we missed him so much. We're coming to get him.

"There is something else. How long has it been for you since Robin came through?" asked Superman.

"A little over a month," answered Thor defensively. "As I understand it, building the Tesseract Transmitter was complex."

"On this side, it's been just over eight years. Our experts have been studying what happened since you made contact. The theory is, when the portal collapsed, the time distortion snapped back in the other direct speeding our universe ahead of yours the exact amount time had distorted in reverse. The events you are talking about happened eight years ago."

"The child lost seven years not eight," protested Thor. Suddenly the strange reactions made more sense.

"It took time before he was on the scene. He was not inside the time distortion field from the moment it began. I apologize, science isn't my strength."

Thor was still uneasy. "The Man of Bats will be kind and civil."

"That's going to make Robin very uncomfortable," warned Superman choosing his words carefully. "Batman rarely shows public affection. It draws the unwanted attention of villains towards Robin. His gruff exterior protects Robin and intimidates villains."

"Robin said he'd been kidnapped twenty something times," protested Thor. "I don't think the unkindness helps in the least!"

"The villains see through the act," admitted Superman.

Robin came back dressed in pj's. "Superman can I talk to Batman again? Mr. Stark says it's past bedtime and well I wanted to say goodnight."

"Goodnight Robin. We love you okay," Superman signed off and Batman returned.

"Batman its bedtime and I have to go. Can you read me that sorry about the drunk monkey?"

There was silence from the other end for a little while and then a deep and gravelly voice softly spoke reciting from memory. "I went to the Animal Fair. The birds and the beasts were there. The big baboon by the light of the moon was combing his auburn hair. The monkey he got drunk and stepped on the elephants trunk…"


	16. Tweets

_Because bro's make me happy._

The Transmitter was left on full time with a sensors set up around it. The open line of communication was necessary. A great deal of testing was still being done on the League side.

Tony soon realized that dimensional engineering was in its' infancy in both worlds.

Batman, Superman, Flash and someone called Cyborg who didn't know Robin but was a local expert on the relevant technology, had spoken with Tony Stark for some time formulating plans. As long as Robin was safe, the plan was to proceed with caution. A custom Boomtube was required because as Robin had guessed, the universes were much farther apart then the League had dealt with before. There was a rather grim theory that the radiation was not due to the method used to generate a dimensional portal but due to the extreme distance between the dimensions.

"Robin go back to bed," said Stark not even looking up from what he was working on.

"I'm not tired," protested Robin. "Can't I at least watch?"

"Do you remember that report you did on the moon landing back in 4th grade?" asked Batman.

"No," admitted Robin. "All I remember from 4th grade is the teacher, this one time, had such a big sneeze, she pee-peed and Marty laughed so hard he shoved the crayon he scratching his nose with, in so far he had to go to the nurses office."

"I can see why that would be more memorable than the moon landing," commented Tony smirking tiredly.

"When humanity decided to put a man on the moon it didn't happen right away. There were a lot of crashes, test flights and unmanned flights first. New technology had to be developed," Batman explained. "This is like trying to reach the moon. It isn't going to happen in an hour, a day or even a week. I will get you home but it's going to take time."

Tony was expecting tears but Robin just yawned hugely and hugged his bear. Hearing that voice on the other end of the transmitter was enough after so long with only vague hopes. Robin didn't care what Batman said, as long as he kept talking. "Belka and Strelka were the first dogs to survive orbital flight," said Robin.

When no one answered he added, "Was B'dzader the first man on the moon?"

It was Martian Manhunter back in the Monitor Womb who answered. "Sorry Robin, that was the first Martian on the moon."

"I'm going to take him back to bed. It's after midnight here. I'll be back for a bit but then I need to call it a night myself. I have other matters that need attention," admitted Tony.

"No one's told the munchkin about the eight year time loss yet," Tony explained when he got back. "How do you want to handle that one?" Tony was done with cutting edge science and technology for the day.

Batman wanted to think for a day or two to figure out how to break the news but insisted Robin needed to be told soon.

At five in the morning Robin was awake. He hacked Jarvis and snuck out of the room up to the transmitter.

"Hello?" he called softly. Robin wasn't sure who would be on duty in the Monitor Womb or what time it was on the other side. What Robin didn't know was Batman had transferred the inter-dimensional signal to the Batcave.

"Hi!"

"Who are you?" asked Robin not recognizing the voice.

"Are you really Robin the Boy Wonder who disappeared 8 years ago?"

"What do you mean 8 years ago?" asked Robin. "I'm me, but I disappeared a month ago."

"I thought you knew about the time distortion backlash. Uhhh… It's been 8 years on this side. Eh,… Batman's going to own me over this."

"Who are you?" repeated Robin.

"Well, heh, heh the thing is. Eight years is a long time. B was not in a good way after you died. But he wanted to… You made him want... to reach out again. It wasn't to me. Not at first. This kid tried to steal the tires on the Batmobile. He was a street kid. He had no one and I think when B met him he thought of what would have happened to you, if he hadn't stepped in.

B shouldn't have done it. He was grieving and he adopted the kid and made him Robin. It didn't work out well. The kid needed off the streets, he needed a good home. He was a good fighter but he wasn't ready to be Robin. He was impulsive. He didn't respect authority. He was a rebel, smoking, foul-mouthed. To be fair, the kid believed in doing the right thing but he wasn't good at thinking things through. Joker got him.

B was two for two in the worst way possible. Gotham got dark and Batman got darker. Agent A started inviting me over just to have a young person around. I used to be your neighbor. You used to babysit me sometimes, and no, don't say my name, even if you guess it. I was over more and more. My family, well things happened and I ended up adopted into the family. I know it was something B wanted for you for years but he always thought you'd say no. Would you have said no?"

"The first year I would have, but not later. B promised me he wouldn't try to replace you know, them and it was what I needed to hear at first but not so much later," Robin admitted.

"That's kind of what I thought. Anyway, Agent A has always been level headed and he was helping this time. It didn't happen all at once. I found things out. At first I was just helping on the computer. Then helping with files and lab work. Then I was learning a self defense and after a while, one thing led to another."

"Are you Robin?" asked Robin confused.

"He needed a Robin. I was Robin but I can't be Robin because you're Robin, Robin! I was just Robin. I… Did you know you were my favorite hero when I was little? I kind of redesigned the uniform. It's a lot different then it was. I … Could I be Red Robin?"

"So I have big brother now?" asked Robin.

"Uh huh, …. Yeah!" Red Robin sounded like he was grinning.

"And you took care of B for me."

"… yeah…" answered Red Robin gently, tentatively.

"Thank you."

"You know you poked the mother of all bees nests up top. Batman, well he hasn't talked to the League for years unless the world was about to end."

"Eight years?" asked Robin.

"Yeah." Red Robin took a deep breath then continued. "Flash and Superman came right to the front door. They didn't waste time trying to get B to listen. They went straight for Agent A. Next thing I know Batman's hitching a ride with Superman to the nearest Zeta point. I never thought in a million years I'd see that. Those two don't talk. Agent A was crying and laughing at the same time."

"Every communication device in this place had to be disabled. They were all going at once. How many hero friends do you have?" Red Robin asked laughing.

"Well…" began Robin. "When we were first making the Justice League I suggested the name Super Friends but I was outvoted. The only other one that voted for name Super Friends was the monkey Gleek. He and the Wonder Twins left the next week."

"Wonder Twins and a monkey Gleek. You have got to be playing me," Red Robin protested.

"Robin?" A deep voice interrupted

"Eh,"/ "Um," Two boys guiltily stuttered.

"Are you smiling?" Red Robin asked dumbfounded.

"Aren't I allowed?"

"You just don't," protested Red Robin.

"Give Dad extra hugs for me Bro!" Robin giggled cheerfully.

"Robin what are you doing in here?" asked Tony. Robin knew he wasn't supposed to go into Mr. Stark's lab unaccompanied.

"Uh oh, bye!" There was a pitter-patter of little feet running off.

"ROBIN! No way kid. Get back here! Jarvis lock the door."

"…yes mr. stark…" Robin looked over at the transmitter. "…can we talk about this somewhere else?"

"Did you hack Jarvis so he wouldn't report your location so you could sneak up here?"

Robin, still looking at the transmitter rather than Tony, nodded.

"Why are you in trouble?" asked Tony.

"…because jarvis is your's and its not nice t' mess wif him and i'm not suppoz't be'n here when your not?"

"Kid do I strike you as some kind of wet blanket?" demanded Tony.

Robin squirmed but didn't answer.

"Do you remember what happened with Hydra?" asked Tony.

Robin nodded.

"Jarvis is a critical part of the security system!"

"… i just turned d'volume down so it woul'nt wake thor.."

"Stop mumbling kid! Thor can hear a butterfly sneeze on the other side of a football field! You disabled the volume of your security reporting completely!" Tony had no idea that this kid scolding person was inside him. He felt like he was channeling Nick Fury but what was frustrating was that, though it was obvious the kid didn't like being in trouble, it was also obvious the kid didn't think that what he'd done was dangerous.

"Stay here! On that spot! Don't move a muscle, not even to scratch your nose! I'm getting Thor maybe he can get through to you," Tony threw his hands in the air and stormed off.

He looked back just as he was about to slam the door in frustration. "Turn off the water works short stuff! It's not like you didn't know you shouldn't have done it!"

Everything was silent for a while then, "Robin?" spoke a deep voice that had quietly listened before.

"…umm hum?"

"You will fix the holes in their computer security system until it is no longer possible for you to hack it. You will suggest and help them implement all upgrades to the security I would deem appropriate. You will test and service every single security device in that facility and you will apologize to both of them."

Robin knew if he didn't speak up he wouldn't be heard at all. "I'm not allowed on the top ten floors because they're being repaired and there are workers and Mr. Stark and Thor thought it was safer if I was out of sight and away from anyone they didn't know personally. Also, a lot of the security systems involve potentially lethal counter measures. I won't be allowed."

"Find a way to test and service the security devices that is not disruptive and does not put you in harms way," Bruce insisted.

Robin could tell Bruce was Bruce and not Batman just by the tone of his voice.

"Oky doky," answered Robin still sniffing back tears.

Red Robin who had heard everything turned to Bruce. "How old is he?"

"Five and Twelve and to a lesser extent Nineteen," answered Bruce.

"I'll be five next Thursday," answered Robin. "And thirteen in two and a half weeks. You'd know better than me when I'm turning twenty. I wasn't conscious when they made records for me here so they guessed at my age and decided I was five."

"Daddy was talking about getting me a two-wheeler for my birthday. I don't remember if I got it though. I wanted this red rocket with streamers and a bell. It was in the second hand store for ten dollars. Pop umm I guess I shouldn't say his name but he said he'd store the bike in one of the equipment trailers for me when we were traveling."

"Which birthday feels the most real?" asked Red Robin.

"Five," answered Robin still sniffing back tears. "I feel like Alice in Wonderland. Every morning when I wake up I have to believe in seven impossible things before breakfast. If you have to put me in a loony bin eventually can you make sure it's somewhere other than Arkham or Belle Reve."

"Us Bats will build a basement for the Batcave and sit together in a padded pastel room with apple sauce and rubber spoons and talk about our feelings. I'll be fun," said Red Robin.

Robin sniffed, wiped his nose on his pajama sleeve and giggled a little sadly.

"I'll have to commission specially designed straight jackets," added Bruce. "Any one of us would be able to escape a regular one too easily."

"Yours would have to be black or they'd never get you to wear it," spoke Robin very tentatively teasing.

"Dibs on the red one," added Red Robin.

Thor came in with his arms crossed and the Bats hearing footsteps fell silent. They were private people.

"I just got off the phone with the others who are on their way back. Miss Romanoff had some enlightening information to share. Captain America who seems to have a fairly good idea of when and when not to treat you as a five year old thought I should share the information with you," spoke Thor seriously.

"Two and a half million dollars. That's the price on your head right now son."

There was a long low whistle from over the transmitter. "What's the price of a loaf of bread?" asked Red Robin.

"About a dollar," spoke Tony.

"What did he do?" asked Red Robin incredulous.

"Bed," growled Bruce in the background clearly correcting Red Robin rather than Robin.

"What's the time difference between here and there?" Red Robin could be heard asking as he moved away.

A muffled, "They're ahead five hours," could be heard and then nothing.

Robin looked up at Thor waiting resignedly for punishment number three.

Thor was actually at a loss. He had no idea how to punish the boy so he just kept his firm gaze staring at Robin while he racked his brains for ideas. Hydra didn't scare the child. The price on his head didn't even seem to faze him. Thor must have stared the child down for a good twenty minutes racking his brain.

Natasha walked in, obviously just having been dropped off by helicopter. Her hair was wind swept and she still had the ear protection looped round her neck. "Thinking of a punishment?" she divined.

Thor nodded, not taking his eyes off the boy.

Natasha had an answer, "Bear's mine for the rest of the week. He feels safe, secure right? Well you need to understand that if you mess with the security you're not nearly as safe as you should be."

Terrified big blue eyes stared back at her. Robin nodded, tears streaming down his face. He started to hiccup but he didn't protest.

Natasha swept out of the room because if she had to stare at the little guy she was so going to cave.

"What she said," spoke Thor. The child was crying but he actually, finally, seemed to understand and Thor didn't want to mess with that.


	17. Bear

_Because Captain America makes a good teddy bear too._

Robin wanted to make sure everyone was clear that he really wasn't happy with this no Bear plan. He tied every shoe in the building into one big shoe ball. Robin's shoes had Velcro. Jarvis encouragingly explained that it was excellent knots practice and hadn't he mentioned he'd forgotten how to tied a lot of knots. Auntie Tasha was thrilled that he'd found her red flats. She'd lost them two months ago and they were her favorites. Robin scowled.

He put hot sauce in the Ketchup. He didn't like Ketchup. He hardboiled all the eggs but he got caught at that because apparently Jarvis thought he shouldn't be playing with the stove. Everyone had eggs for lunch. Tony apparently really liked the spicy ketchup. Robin pouted. After lunch Thor kept a closer eye on him.

He colored a bear kidnapper sign with a frowny face and taped it to Natasha's door. Auntie Tasha had the nerve to laugh and compliment his artwork. She stuck it on the fridge!

Robin was usually put to bed at around eight. Thor usually came to bed at around eleven. When Thor opened the door to his suite, all the mattresses, pillows, cushions and blankets had been employed in the construction of a huge barricaded fort. All the clothes had been removed from the closets and dressers and hung from wires and strings making a clothing jungle. Robin was hidden in the back of the fort glaring and typing on his watch.

"You should be asleep," commented Thor.

"Upgrading the security system," grumped Robin looking at his wrist computer.

"You're not hacking Jarvis again?" demanded Thor alarmed.

"No, every potential security update goes through to Mr. Stark for approval," growled Robin rubbing his eyes tiredly.

Thor got down on his hands and knees and crawled into the fort. He gently took the watch off and put it in the charging station.

"Does any of this," Thor gestured around the destroyed room. "Strike you as a bit of an over reaction?"

Robin shook his head in denial. "No. Bear'd do the same for me."

"How'd you even get the mattress off my bed?" asked Thor.

"Mechanical advantage."

"At no point did you consider using your words if you wanted Bear back?" asked Thor.

"I'm not talking to you right now."

"Help me put the room back," ordered Thor.

With a lot of stomping and slamming Robin sort of did as he was told. Thor threw the clothes and blankets back and made Robin do it again without the stomping and slamming. It was one in the morning by the time the room was livable again. Thor lay in bed listening. The boy still wasn't sleeping. At around four in the morning Robin's anger lost steam and instead of fury he gave in and just cried. It was ten to five when he finally fell asleep. Thor watched the clock turn to five with dread hoping the child wouldn't wake up. He didn't. He slept in until six then started on security upgrades again.

"Just give the blasted bear back," complained Tony a day later. "He's insufferable. He won't sleep and I'm pretty sure he's just pretending to eat. Do you have any idea how paranoid most of his suggested upgrades are? Jarvis is so heavily locked down I'm having trouble making modifications to him and the scenarios the kid is guarding against are giving me nightmares!"

"The insufferable part is exactly why we can't give Bear back," protested Natasha. "It's about respect of authority. A five year old doesn't get to be in charge. It's just until the end of the week anyway."

Steve was quiet. Robin's behavior was not normal for him. Part of what bothered him was that Robin wouldn't explain why he wanted Bear back so badly. He peaked out of the room to see what the boy was up to. Robin was currently coloring on the window; angry drawings of giant bears roaring at them. The bears were multicolored because Robin kept pressing so hard the crayons would break.

"Have you talked to Batman?" asked Steve.

"I refuse to talk to the man of bats!" protested Thor.

When everyone had left and Thor was busy scolding Robin, Steve went to the Transmitter. It was 4:30 here so that meant it was 11:30 there. "Hello? Is anyone there?"

An elderly gentleman answered. "Good afternoon. How may I be of assistance?"

"My name is Steve Rogers. I think I need to talk to Batman about Robin."

"Is this a matter of some urgency or may he call you back sir?"

"It is important but not urgent," answered Steve. "Who am I speaking to and do you know Robin well enough to know if something was really wrong?"

"You may call me Agent A and yes I am quite familiar with young Master Robin."

Steve told him about Bear and the behavior, the lack of sleep and sudden loss of appetite. Agent A listened and asked how Robin had been behaving before.

"When the young Master is under significant stress, loss of appetite and irregular sleep patterns are quite normal. The remainder of the behavior clearly seems a desperate cry for help. May I speak with the child?" asked Agent A very politely.

"Of course," answered Steve. "According to him he's not talking to us although he still seems to have a lot to say." Steve added.

It took Agent A about five seconds to deduce the problem. "Now young man, what's this I hear about a bear?"

"He was the only one I could talk to! Last month… uh and Red Robin said… uh, the thing… I…" Robin burst into tears. The last semi legible thing he said was, "the temision nod s'cure."

"The transmission is not secure? I see. Well go play for a little while and I'll speak to Batman."

"Now Mr. Rogers this may take some time. I have no wish to unduly inconvenience you. Perhaps it would be best if you were to check back in an hour's time."

The Avengers would probably never understand how big a deal it was, how much analysis, discussion, consideration, planning, conferencing, League medical and physiological experts had already gone into this issue. Bruce had anticipated this issue and was prepared for Alfred's call. The only thing that surprised him a little was the involvement of a teddy bear.

It wasn't quite an hour. "I need to speak with Robin alone," spoke Batman straight to the point.

Robin was currently playing Marbles with Dummy. He hadn't actually gone anywhere. They were using ball bearings from the scrap bin as marbles. Robin had colored chalk targets all over Tony's shop floor. It wasn't like the windows. Tony covered the floor in chalk all the time when he was thinking out large scale plans. He had a little shop bot that could clean it up in minutes.

"Robin can Steve Rogers be trusted with secrets? I want a complete risk assessment." Steve heard as put on some headphones, turned up some music and went to the other side of the shop to give them some privacy. A long while later Robin came over.

"Captain Rogers, Batman wants to talk to you again."

Robin curled up on a comfortable chair and in about two seconds flat was snoring lightly. Steve took that as a good sign.

"Robin needs someone to talk to other than a stuffed animal," said Batman. "In order for him to talk to someone and have them understand, carefully guarded secrets have to be revealed, secrets that could literally rip this world apart in the wrong hands. It's too much for a young child. He can't wait weeks and weeks until we figure out how to get him home. He needs someone to talk to now."

What followed after was the mother of all duty and responsibility with sensitive information speeches complete threats of consequences and everything. It was the 'loose lips sink ships' spiel updated for a modern age. Batman made it clear that no other person was to share in the information, not the other Avengers, not innuendo, hints or jokes. It seemed ridiculously over the top for my son needs a friendly ear to talk to but Steve just calmly agreed. Thor had warned him Batman was rather intense.

Steve canceled his appointments for the next day. He stopped to pick up a kid's motorcycle helmet, jacket and gloves, packed a picnic lunch. He scoped out the area around the Tower as best he could for Hydra. Early the next morning Robin climbed up behind him on his motorcycle and they took off for somewhere isolated and away from technology where Robin would feel safe to talk.

Thor watched them go. He was grateful to the Captain. The naughtiness had stopped instantly and Robin had actually slept for a few hours. Steve said Batman had issued no word of discipline or anger.

When Robin first started to talk he didn't make a lot of sense. Steve knew he had to be patient.

"I was at my circus with mommy, daddy and everything disappeared and I was here. That's what I talk to Bear about most. How can time go backwards but only for me? Where's everyone gone? How do you hide an elephant? Mommy and Daddy could play hide and seek but, Elinore elephant? I don't understand."

Steve cast out his fishing line. They were in a rowboat in the middle of a lake to be sure Robin knew no one else was around. They were pretending to fish. "Batman has an elephant named Elinore?" asked Steve.

"I'm not talking about Batman right now. I'm talking about my family. Batman came later."

"Batman's not your dad?" asked Steve.

"No, Batman's like Thor except that Batman's like two people, Batman and Bruce. Bruce is real. Batman is well, kind of like… I don't know how to explain."

"So what about your parents?"

"When I was older my family was murdered. I saw it. I didn't die only everyone else. It was a bad man named Zucco. He wanted money from the circus and when they wouldn't buy into his protection racket well... I heard him making threats and saw him with tools and I should have warned someone but I didn't understand until later. I talk to Bear about that a little but I don't like thinking about it. If I start thinking about it I can't turn off the pictures. The Martians must have helped tone down the memories. I haven't had any night terrors or episodes like that since I've been here."

Steve had to remind himself to breath. It was like a nightmare inside a nightmare. Disappeared try to wake up, murdered try to wake up.

"The authorities took me from my circus home. They said it wasn't good enough to be my family. Pop Haly wanted me, but they took me away. Police and CPS were supposed to be the good guys but they put me in terrible place where I didn't know anyone. The children were so angry they hurt each other and me too. The grown ups were angry too. I told Bear about the place where everyone was angry. He tells me angry is like poison. It's not good for you. I'm really trying not to be angry Captain Rogers. I'm not doing such a good job right now."

Steve wondered when it would stop. The circus disappeared again and was replaced by a nightmare environment orchestrated by what should have been figures of trust.

"Bruce took me in and it was better. Alfred's like my Grandpa. I didn't mean to hurt them but I abandoned Bruce to sad and angry for 8 years. I think it's my fault my brother I never even met got killed. Batman forgot too much angry doesn't leave room for anything else. My brother needed love and…" Robin abandoned what he was saying because he hadn't really worked out what he thought about it yet and there were so many other things going on in his head.

"You're talking about when you entered the Tesseract to stop it from destroying your world."

Robin nodded. "I guess alive is better than dead right? I don't like that choice. Where I can save them and break their hearts or let everyone die. Bear says it's not a choice, it's just a soldier's reality."

You're not a soldier you're a little boy thought Steve desperately.

"Batman didn't want me to be anything but safe and happy," Robin explained, seeing the look Steve was giving him.

"Bear's the only one here that knows Robin's not even a name. It's a pseudonym to protect my true self so that when I'm not wearing a mask and uniform I can be just an ordinary boy and still be safe. My name is Richard John Grayson."

"Your name's not Robin?" asked Steve interrupting again.

"Your name's not Captain America," replied the small boy. "I'd never be safe a day in my life if anyone found out Robin was me. Robin can have a two and a half million dollar mark to his name but Dick can take off the mask, uniform, brush his hair differently and go to school or play soccer or hang out with friends. I'll at least need a pair of dark glasses before going home. My name is probably the most heavily guarded league secret ever. Do you understand this part? All of my past can lead back to my name and my name can unravel everyone's protection."

Robin explained for a while how the secrets revealed could place him in danger, Batman, the rest of the league and by extension the world. Steve was distracted for a little while because he hadn't heard a Richard refer to himself as Dick since the 40's.

"I, I wanted to tell Bear how I let my family down because I know I'll loose the family name when I get home. Bruce always told me how important family names were. Bruce comes from a dynasty of Wayne's stretching back hundreds of years. The Grayson's were world famous aerialists. We've performed for kings and presidents. I'm the last Grayson. Richard Grayson died eight years ago and there's no realistic way to keep my civilian identity without compromising important secrets when I'm almost five years old but should be turning twenty. My real name is going to be gone."

"Almost five?" asked Steve.

"My birthday's next Thursday," said Dick with a tiny grin.

Steve smiled back. Happy about a birthday was nice.

Richard talked about it being important to him to be doing something to help stop all the bad stuff. He talked about his choosing to become Robin. The time, energy and effort he put into it and the reality that no one in their right mind would let a five year old be Robin.

"Did Batman make you Robin?" interrupted Steve.

"Everyone thinks that but it's not true. He did the same thing you guys did. I was already trying to be Robin. He stopped me from getting killed doing something I was going to do anyway. He too replaced my red vest with something to stop bullets. He tried to teach me about the dangers to scare me into stopping or at least making safer choices. Eventually he figured the only way to keep me safe was to keep me by his side. I'd have stayed there anyway because Batman is Bruce and Bruce is my dad now. I have to protect him. He stayed through the nightmares and mistakes and, and well everything and if he didn't know to how to help, he learned and…" Dick had to stop for a while because he couldn't seem to stop crying.

Robin or rather Richard talked about Barbara, Wally and Roy his friends. He was worried they wouldn't have anything in common anymore and he'd just be an annoying little kid.

Richard wanted to talk to Bear about the bad people he remembered from being older. The Joker and Two Face in particular terrified him. He felt guilty because sometimes he wanted to stay hiding here, far away from them.

When Steve asked a few questions about the Joker and Two Face it was so sickeningly horrifying that Steve had trouble moving on. Richard's home city of Gotham was a war zone of mobsters, psychopaths, gangs, mutants, robbers and murders. Kidnapping and professional arson were common. It was no wonder that Hydra didn't really scare Richard. Hydra would just kill him. He was used to scarier things than death.

Robin talked a little about his new Team. They were like junior Avengers but they had only been on a few missions before Robin disappeared so he didn't know them well enough yet to have strong feelings about them but he remembered being really excited about maybe them becoming friends. They used to be close to his age. He hoped he hadn't messed up the Team. Batman had kind of been spearheading it.

Finally Richard was a little worried Bruce wouldn't like him because he wasn't yet the person Bruce had known and Bruce didn't like change much. He was pretty sure that he was being silly about this worry but he wanted to ask Bear, his opinion.

"Did you know Bear can read lips when I mouth the words in Romani in the dark. Bear just had to enable his night vision. He'd never give away any of my secrets."

When they got back to the Tower. Steve commandeered Bear from Natasha and since he ended up with a bit of an audience he spoke, "Robin we made a mistake okay? We won't take Bear away again. I promise."

Robin hugged Captain America. "Thanks Uncle Steve."

 **Bonus Tweet**

 _"So how did you talk him into Young Justice?" asked Red Robin._

 _"Is that what we were on the Justice League system as? Batman always called us just the Team but then he had better sense than to go around using words like sidekick too. He always said partner. He would allow apprentice but understood that sidekick was intended to be derogatory," Robin answered._

 _"Well… friends your own age? I'm grateful and they were only slightly weird about it when I started but how'd you even get him to go there?" Red Robin demanded._

 _"Three seasons worth of My Little Pony Friendship is Magic and he caved," Robin giggled mischievously._

 _"You didn't!"_

 _"We have a written contract somewhere. I'm allowed to associate with young heroes from my decade and all magic friendship media, discourse and merchandise were to cease immediately and in perpetuity."_

 _"See you remember that but have forgotten what hypothermia is. I'm never sure talking to you that you're not just making stuff up at random just to mess with me," protested Red Robin._

 _"You're sure it's not the temperature of water at the bottom of the ocean. Hypo means under doesn't it?"_


	18. Kindercamp

_Because it's not always easy to fit in._

Robin was going to summer camp. It was a day camp being held just outside the city. Apparently the Avengers had some fussing energy to expend after his outing with Captain Rogers.

Tony had taken a roll of painters tape and laid out a path for Robin in his workshop that included the transmitter and somewhere comfortable to sit. Robin was allowed access to the taped off area of the lab at anytime he wanted without having to ask unless a no entry sign was up. Everyone wanted him to understand that no one was going to keep him from talking to home as long as he respected the boundaries taped out on the floor. The transmitter couldn't be moved and the lab was not kid friendly but it was the best they could do.

A master detective trained Robin. He noticed things. In the workshop, the crowbars had been removed from the wall and the box cutters were gone from the strings by the shipping station and 3D laser printer. There was fresh paint hiding the tool outline where the crowbars used to be.

Robin noticed other things too. There used to be a Yankee's baseball bat hanging on the wall behind the bar. It had been in a glass case and had been signed by the whole team. Robin spotted it in Pepper's office with a 'for charity auction' post-it-note on it.

Just underneath one of the club chairs in the main room was a tiny charred corner of a playing card and on the coffee table in front of the chair was small distinctive electricity burn mark.

Clint watched Robin inspect his surroundings curiously. Robin turned to him. "They didn't have to do all that you know."

"Do what?" asked Clint playing dumb.

"Thor ripped up then burned the jokers. I'd guess Mr. Stark for the tools in the workshop because he doesn't like anybody touching his stuff there without permission. I'm not sure who took the baseball bat down but that is Mr. Stark's handwriting on the post-it note."

"Steve took it down. Tony decided to donate it. Other than that you're spot on. Did anybody ever tell you you're kind of creepy sometimes?" said Clint.

Robin grinned. "You think I'm creepy, try to get away with anything when Batman's around. You didn't brush your teeth. You ate the last cookie. You're hiding the history paper with an A minus in you're sock drawer. I'm not afraid of spiders so you can take the plastic spider out from behind your back and you forgot to change you're underwear!" Robin growled trying to imitate Batman.

Clint laughed.

Robin sighed then hugged Bear. "They didn't have to do any of that, but it's sweet. Gotham's villains wig you guys out too?"

"Robbie thing is, Avengers aren't so good with the things they can't do anything about so this is us doing something even if it's only little. It makes us feel better, " explained Clint. "And anybody not wigged out by Gotham's villains is not firing on all cylinders."

Robin helped Thor with the disguises for summer camp. Thor was sporting a biker getup complete with temporary tattoos, bandana and dark glasses. Apparently tattoos draw a lot of attention away from someone's face.

Robin decided not to dress too distinctively. He got new runners and slipped on fake prescription glasses. Glasses were the hero traditional reverse mask. Robin thought of Superman and Wonder Woman. His bulletproof vest was to stay on under his motorcycle jacket until he was at camp and then it would go in his backpack because it couldn't be hidden wearing summer clothes and the disguise was his biggest protection.

"The Harley Davidson belongs to a long time employee," explained Tony. "He's getting a bonus for lending it to us without a paper trail."

Robin would ride the first few blocks from the Tower hidden in a duffle bag strapped to the back of the Harley. Natasha explained someone had been found near the Tower scanning car and delivery truck heat signatures.

They got to camp safely.

Robin felt really self-conscious his first day of camp. Thor was surprised to find Robin pressed against his leg. So international terrorists didn't faze him but other five year olds did? Then, Thor looked up at the five year olds. There were twenty in the group. Three were screaming for their mothers. One was being chased by a councilor because he kept hitting things at random with a large stick he'd found. One had dumped her daypack out. Her lunch box was spilled on the grass and she was eating crackers covered in dirt. One little boy insisted on showing everyone his underpants which were apparently Spiderman underpants and wasn't that the coolest thing ever? Two were cheerfully attempting to rip the arms off of one of the councilors, who smiled at them as if this was a normal thing.

Thor backed away pushing Robin forward. "Have fun." Thor fled.

"So how was the first day of camp," asked Tony at dinner. Sit down dinners had been on the Avengers list of things they could do to help Robin feel like he was in a more stable environment. No more grazing like cowboys round a stew pot. They'd lit candles and everything.

Robin looked around doing his best to keep from giggling. Captain Rogers was wearing the Stars and Stripes having gotten in at the last minute. Mr. Barton had pulled his chair around backwards because he'd forgotten he was wearing his arrow sheath. Thor's arms were covered in smeared tattoos and Auntie Tasha was wearing a low cut evening gown. Doctor Banner and Tony had succeeded in looking normal.

"Well I made this," said Robin taking a mess of strings, sticks, feathers, construction paper and glue from his pocket and setting it on the table with a thump.

"What is it?" asked Clint.

"I haven't got a clue," answered Robin. "I think it was supposed to be an aboriginal dream catcher or maybe a mobile or maybe a bird nest thingy. Everyone was being really loud during the instructions and it seemed to make the councilors happy when I kept sticking things to it at random."

Tony snorted water out of his nose trying not to laugh.

"Oh, here." Robin shoved a piece of paper at Thor.

"What's this," asked Thor.

"You know that kid from drop off with the stick?"

Thor nodded.

"Well the councilors never did get it away from him and around lunch time he whacked Annabeth with it and she started to cry. She had a big welt down the side of her face. Anyway, so I shoved Gary in a puddle, took his stick and launched it off the side of the cliff. Gary spent the rest of the afternoon in tears and because he was all wet his parents had to come early to pick him up and they spent half an hour yelling at the councilors. Apparently you have to talk to me about how inappropriate it is to shove people into puddles and take their sticks, then sign the letter so they know you're aware of what happened," Robin explained.

"Was Gary hurt?" asked Thor for clarification.

Robin was indignant. "Of course not! He's five! What do you take me for? The idiots had been asking him nicely to put the stick down all morning. Annabeth was the third kid in tears. All I did was shove him in a puddle and take his stick away!"

Steve glanced down at his uniform just noticing he'd worn it to the dinner table then looked over at Robin who was scowling. "I think, perhaps we're the wrong group of people to be scolding you for shoving someone in a puddle and taking their stick away," Steve admitted.

"What's worse is Annabeth spent the rest of the day chasing me to hug me," Robin crossed his hands in front of him and glared at Thor as if the poor god was responsible for the invention of girls, cooties and everything.

Thor looked down trying to concentrate on his food.

"So what else happen over the course of your day?" asked Tony.

"Got yelled at for climbing trees and flips and stuff and apparently I don't know how to play soccer without making others cry."

"Why were they crying?" asked Tony. This whole conversation was the most entertaining thing that had happened to him all day. The Tower had been soooo quiet. Tony had actually gotten work done. It was horrible.

"Well, I'd take the ball from whoever wasn't on my team, run with it down the field, score a goal and then do it again. I tried passing to someone on my team but they'd usually just kick it somewhere at random. Annabeth, kept trying to sit or belly flop on the ball, right in the middle of the game. Sabir ended up kicking her in the tummy when he was trying to kick the ball. Annabeth had a rough day."

"What was Gary doing during soccer?" asked Natasha.

"Oh he was whacking at rocks like they were golf balls. He still had the stick at the time." Robin shook his head in disbelief. "He managed to bean a squirrel."

"Peter, he was one of the nicer councilors. He said he's been doing the councilor thing all summer and the first day of the week is always tears and drama in the kindergarten camp. He's got a girl friend Mary-Jane. She's been telling him kindergarteners are so cute. He says she won't believe him when he tries to tell her we're hell spawn," said Robin matter-of-factly.

"Oh there is one more thing I suppose I should mention," Robin added. "Peter is a photographer for one of the local newspapers during the school year. I'm pretty sure he saw through the disguises from the way he was looking at you and me but don't worry he won't say anything."

Everyone had sat up alarmed and alert. "How do you know he won't tell anyone?" asked Steve.

"Because he goofed. See I was, I don't know maybe about 80 feet up in a tree trying to get one of the kites down. They kind of panicked when they spotted me and were going to call the fire department or something ridiculous. Anyway, Peter followed me up, but the branches were too thin up high to support his weight so, he was just holding onto the trunk. I came down when I saw he didn't realize his climb mechanics were obviously wrong. I don't want him to get in trouble on my account. Dumb kite is still up the tree. I almost had it."

Everyone at the table was staring at Robin in astonishment. "Umm…" said Tony. "So the flips and the tree climbing, what did we learn?"

"Oh rats," exclaimed Robin in frustration. "I was doing the same stupid thing as Spiderman!"

"Spiderman?" Repeated Thor.

"It took me a five minute internet search," explained Robin. "New York, climb, hero. That's the thing about spandex. It does nothing to disguise your body type. His hands were splayed out on the tree trunk like this."

"Did you tell him you know?" asked Natasha.

"Gosh of course not. That's not good manners."

.

.

.

.

"I can still cartwheel right? Other kids cartwheel?"


	19. Coming Clean

_Because Batman wanted him home in time for his Birthday_

Goings on at summer camp, were eclipsed by the first trial of the Justice League Boom Tube. The entire tower was evacuated. Blast shields were set up. Every kind of monitoring equipment anyone could think of was assembled and pointing at a preselected location on the ground floor just outside the tower. It was actually a smoker's patio.

Shield had been informed of the test. The Avengers had talked about it ad-nauseum and finally reluctantly admitted there was no way to exclude Shield and not end up in the super villains category. The Helicarrier was on stand by in the harbor. Armed soldiers were pointing weapons of mass destruction at the smoker's patio and Robin was at summer camp painting a pet rock kept completely in the dark. He did wonder a little why Auntie Tasha was hidden in the woods watching him today. It was making Peter nervous.

Coming clean yesterday had been interesting. Tony had fudged a few of the details to Shield. The Tesseract Transmitter was kept secret. Thankfully there were so many secrets to be revealed that Shield didn't have time to go digging after every odd detail. The Avengers had waited until the day before the test was due to occur to tell Shield.

"You see, the Justice League wants their hero back," explained Tony.

Fury was suspicious. When the Avengers weren't telling the whole truth it was always Stark doing the talking. When they were being upfront about things Captain America was their spokes person.

"We have done them an injustice," spoke Thor.

"We, as in you lot?" asked Fury.

"That would be a royal we," explained Captain America. "We as representative of this planet as a collective of reasoning beings, let some of our number commit a massive injustice."

"Displacing a five year old?" demanded Fury.

"The Tesseract portal generator last month was severely unstable. The death toll on the alternate earth was an estimated 1.7 million persons. If they hadn't intervened it would have wiped out all life on their planet," spoke Stark who had the numbers off the Justice league.

"So their hero is a five year old?" Fury clarified. Only an idiot would believe this nonsense.

Captain Rogers sighed, "He started off older. It's our fault he's five too."

"I was led to believe you lot shut down the Tesseract device," Fury was furious.

Barton couldn't resist blurting out this part because frankly it was hilarious. "Actually the God of Thunder and the Super Soldier got captured. The five year old shut down the portal and rescued them. Ironman just blew the thing sky high before the little kid could get home again."

"What kind of a bloody fool do you take me for!" demanded Fury.

Thor was looking intently at a motivational poster on the wall. Captain America was looking at a potted plant. Iron man was whistling tunelessly while examining a spec on the floor.

"Sir, this is the same five year old that stole a Hydra nuke, jet and massive amounts of Intel," reminded Black Widow.

"And you're coming forth with this information now? If we're to have any kind of working relationship, I can't have secrets of this magnitude being held."

"I am answering directly to the All Father on this one," explained Thor.

"Black Widow?" Fury would have sworn she was one of his most loyal agents.

Natasha Romanoff shrugged, "He calls me Auntie Tasha."

Fury looked like he was going to explode.

"Hawkeye!?"

"We've been watching Road Runner cartoons."

"Captain?"

"There was no choice but to try and protect him after you started experimenting on him."

"Banner?"

"Are you seriously trying to tell me, I am the logical choice to trust Shield to act with compassion and kindness?"

Fury glared at Stark but decided not to bother. Ridiculousness was to be expected from that idiot.

"So representatives from our universe managed to wipe out 1.7 million of their citizens and you're not at all concerned about the threat of war?" asked Fury incredulous.

"They honestly just want their hero back," insisted Stark.

"YOU, are an idiot," answered Fury shaking a finger at Tony Stark. "This is about taking reasonable precautions."

The Justice League called them Boom Tubes for a reason. The sound wave broke all the first floor windows on the North wall of the Tower. Even wearing hearing protection the soldiers stationed closest to the drop point went around for the rest of the day with their ears ringing. The small test pod that had been sent through was a highly radioactive mass of smoking detection equipment.

Dr. Banner insisted that since the package was received they were calling it a victory. The radiation and G-forces registered by the equipment exceeded normally survivable levels. The radiation exposure was significantly less with the Boom Tube but the G-forces were significantly higher. It fascinated him that the Justice League dimensional device snapped open and shut almost instantaneously compared against the dimensional devices here, which slowly spread open then stayed open until forcibly shut down.

Nick Fury was glad that New York was still standing although more than a little ticked that he'd been placed in the position where he couldn't have stopped the test if he wanted to. He could only do damage control. Inside the test pod tucked in between sensors and delicate equipment (half of which had not survived the trip) was a blue envelope with Robin written on it.

"That's not for you," spoke Thor when Nick went to reach for it.

"The boy doesn't belong to you," answered Fury.

"Do you really want to go there?" asked Thor crossing his arms.

Nick Fury stared down Thor as he opened the envelope very deliberately. It had a picture of an elephant holding balloons and a monkey with a goofy grin wearing a birthday hat. It said Happy 5th Birthday. The inside and back was covered in signatures and little notes.

Nick Fury looked at it. He couldn't do it. It really aught to be scanned for hidden codes and what not. He just didn't have the energy to be that much of a horses rear. He passed the card to Thor. Acting as a liaison between the Avengers who were insanely powerful, volatile and had strong morals that didn't always ally themselves to the government was a thankless infuriating job.

Ironman took the test pod to his lab, followed by half a dozen Shield scientists. "Don't touch anything!" The Transmitter was hidden by a simple cardboard box labeled 'Dum Dums Lollipops,' which had been gingerly placed overtop it. It was still running.

Tony read out the readings on all of the devices supposedly making an oral report for Jarvis's benefit. When he'd finished his inspection, Shield confiscated the test pod. It was a few hours before their guests had left the tower.

After extensively searching the lab for hidden spy devices they finally gave the Justice League side the all clear to open communications.

"Did the card get through? It was tough to get in touch with some of those people. Some people surprised me and came to me. Catwoman insisted on signing it! How'd she even know? And, and Arsenal signed it as Red Arrow and Speedy. He must have interrogated me for an hour and a half about Robin."

Bruce and Tony seldom heard the young voice though Robin had heard it many times it was usually hidden from anyone else.

"Red," growled Batman.

"Sir!"

The rest of the communication was technical. A test pod would be picked up in reverse. Tony began manufacture immediately. Bruce was working on radiation shielding and Tony was working on protecting the interior of the pod from the g-forces.

Thor went to pick up Robin.

Fury was joining them for dinner.

"Seriously Robin?" asked Tony when Thor returned. The boy was mud from head to foot and trailing footprints through the nice clean tower.

"We went catching crayfish! I caught the biggest one! He was blue and he had beady little eyes but big snappy claws," chirped Robin happily. He grinned mischievously as he click-clacked muddy fingers at Tony who backed away disgusted. Robin laughed and ran off to get cleaned up.

Fury seriously didn't know what to think. It was turning into a strange night.

Were the Avengers seriously trying to be domestic? Steve was cooking steaks on the barbeque. One of Tony's shop bots was setting the table. Barton was making a salad. Natasha was putting the finishing touches on some kind of casserole and… Thor the God of Thunder was sat in a chair casually brushing the child's freshly washed hair and chatting with him about crayfish.

Dummy came and lit the candles with a blowtorch, beep-booping then whizzing off.

"So what was the craft today?" asked Tony after they'd sat down for dinner.

Robin pulled a messily painted rock out of his pocket and put it in the middle of the table. "Pet Rock."

"So you can fly a jet but your painting skills look like that?" asked Fury rather rudely.

Thor frowned at him but Robin wasn't offended.

"I know," protested Robin annoyed. "I'm still having trouble with the pincer grip. You should see my handwriting. It's abomibal."

"Abomidable," corrected Barton.

"That's not right," protested Robin.

"Abobinable," said Steve.

"It's abominal," corrected Fury.

"Jarvis?" called Tony.

"Abominable, all of your pronunciation is abominable," announced Jarvis helpfully.

"I think it's just that thing were once one person says it wrong it's impossible to remember the correct version," offered Natasha.

"I used to have trouble with certain L-sounds," said Robin thoughtfully. "Amoominum, Amoominum. Grrr…"

"Are you trying to say A-loo-min-ee-um," asked Bruce.

"No, no I've always been able to manage the British pronunciation. It's the American one that Kid Flash teased me about for half a year. Amoominum."

"It's an aluminum cow. Amoo-minum," teased Clint.

Robin glared at him. "At least I can still say lellow,"

"I think you mean yellow. Come on say spaghetti now," teased Clint.

Robin jumped up furiously grabbing a cherry tomato to whip at Clint's head.

Thor snatched his hand. "Time out!" Thor pointed to the corner.

Robin gave Clint the mother of all Bat-glares and said in a very threatening tone. "Y-E-L-L-O-W…" still glaring at Clint he put the tomato down and went to sit facing the corner.

While Robin was grumbling in the corner, Fury watched the silent hand signal conversation between the Avengers.

Cut his steak! (Natasha)

The steak? (Thor)

Pincer grip, the steak! (Steve)

Thor silently cut up Robin's steak then continued eating eventually calling. "You can come out of time out now."

"You idiots are actually showing team work skills," observed Fury. It was more than something simple like dinner prep and child rearing. They'd been effectively keeping things from Shield. The way the last Hydra mission went… "You're working together as a single functioning unit without pride getting in the way. You're noticing details. What in the Sam hill happened to you lot?"

The soul deep penetrating look Robin gave Fury unnerved him.

 **Bonus Tweet**

"Hi Red."

"Hey Robin. Did they tell you about the test run today?"

"All the first floor windows on the North side of the tower blew out and we ended up with the Director of Strategic Homeland blah, blah, blah for dinner so they had to tell me something was going on. How did it go?"

"Through an infinity of realities we got a test pod through to where you are. I call that party time. How's camp going?"

"Do you know who Thomas the Tank Engine is? Apparently he's da'bomb and is way cooler than Wiggles or so I've been told."

 _ **Batman was grumpy. The test pod had far to much damage to just jump through and bring his boy home. Everyone else managed to look on the bright side.**_


	20. Birthday

_Because "It's my party I can cry if I want to," isn't really Robin's style._

Thor huffed in frustration. Robin was going to be late for camp. The boy had been wandering around like a shell-shocked puppy dog all morning. He'd had to ask him to do simple tasks four and five times.

"Robin, you can't take Bear to camp. Go put him in your bed."

"Robin your shoes are on the wrong feet and that shirt is on backwards."

"I already told you Bear can't go to camp, take him back out of your backpack and put him away."

"Friend Steve, a little assistance would be welcome," called Thor.

"It's his birthday," reminded Steve. He got down on one knee in front of Robin. "Can I borrow Bear for a moment." Steve held Bear up in front of Robin. "Okay buddy, take a picture of him with your fancy watch and then you'll have the picture for camp, deal?"

Robin nodded silently and snapped a photo of Bear with his watch.

"It's his birthday and he's not with his family so he's feeling a little uneasy," Steve simplified.

"You can talk with Batman and Red Robin tonight," Thor protested.

Steve and Robin stared at one another for the truth was one of the identity secrets that only Steve knew. Ignoring Martian memories for a moment, this was Robin's first special day without his family and there would be no more special days, no holidays, no birthdays and that was a lot for anyone to wrap their head around.

Steve ruffled Robin's hair gently. "I'll put Bear away for you."

Camp was less than asterous. Robin got separated from the group on the nature hike because he wasn't paying attention. He looked around the scenic stop. There were five trails he could choose from. Robin walked over to the trail map posted there. A vandal had torn most of the map off. It was useless.

A flash of lightening tore across the sky and it started to pour. Drenched in seconds Robin sighed. He turned the GPS in his watch on, looking to see if there was an online trail map. The park trails weren't shown but the roads were and his location showed. Robin took the trail pointed most directly to the park entrance. He could find the kinder-campsite from there. If lightening flashing across the sky and pouring rain were anything like as exciting as the family of raccoons the campers had seen the day before, it would be a while before the councilors got the campers calmed down enough to do a head count.

It was the wrong trail. After traveling down it for 45 minutes then checking the GPS to find the trail had looped off in the wrong direction Robin turned around and trudged back to where he started then just sat curled in a ball by the scenic stop shivering. The weather was bad and the satellite signal to the GPS was inconsistent. It was safest to just stay put on the main path until someone came along. It was probably what he should have done to begin with. 20 minutes later Peter came jogging along calling his name.

"I'm over here," answered Robin.

Peter came running up speaking on a walkie-talkie for a few minutes. "Hey little buddy, everyone's been looking for you."

"Sorry," answered Robin shivering. Robin walked back under his own steam surprising Peter a bit.

"Hey, I'm glad we found you before the 3 hour mark when we would have had to call your parents and the police and everything," Peter teased.

"It wouldn't have been a big deal. I have cell phone and locator in my watch. I should have looked up the phone number and called the camp office. I didn't think of it till now. Sorry."

Peter looked at Robin. "You know how to read and use a phone?" he asked surprised.

Robin nodded.

Peter took Robin to the camp office to get warmed up. "I'm going have to call your Dad anyway to get you some dry clothes." Peter wasn't looking forward to it. He knew who dropped Robin off every morning.

It turned out no one was home. (The Avengers were off fighting giant robots in another state.)

At four thirty, half an hour before pickup, Robin got an email.

 **Robin, please ask if Peter will look after you for the evening. Pepper is in Japan and we won't be able to get back in time. He will be compensated for his time.**

 **T. Odinson**

Robin showed Peter the email.

"This isn't your day is it," observed Peter. "Yeah, I'm free but we've got to do something about those wet cloths."

Robin thought for a minute. Both Robin and Peter were still trying to pretend they didn't recognize each other. "I don't have a key for home."

They took the camp bus back to the city. Robin wore one of Peter's sweatshirts like a dress while they threw his cloths in the drier. Aunt May made them hot chocolate, soup and sandwiches for dinner. She was going out to her quilting club. The rain had finally let up.

When Robin was dry at last, he dug through his backpack. It was his birthday and he was finished with this day being rotten. He pulled out a long awkward shape wrapped in yellow fabric with a mischievous grin. He put on his red vest, donned his cape and took off his glasses.

"Come on Spidey let's put the smack down on some bad guys!" Robin grinned. "We'll spar over in the park. If I can take you, you take me on patrol."

Peter spit the water he was drinking all over the couch in surprise. "Uh, I, You,…"

"Don't play dumb. Come on, come on!" Robin bouncing on his feet; took a book from the coffee table and whipped it hard at Peter's head, grinning playfully.

Peter of course dodged it and caught it. "What the?"

"See Spidey reflexes! Come on! I've had a rotten day. I want to have fun!" Robin, standing in place, did a back flip, followed a kick in the air and a punch holding the pose waiting.

"Your dad will kill me!" protested Peter.

Robin laughed and ran out the front door. He leapt into the tree and pulled up a display on his watch. "Come on, there's a Rhino-man at the stock exchange smashing stuff! We can play with Rhino-man!" cheered Robin happily. Robin's head tilted to the side as he thought for a moment. If he went on ahead, Spidey'd catch up. Robin leap onto the roof of a passing truck headed in the right direction. "Take that stinky day! You can't mess with my birthday!"

Peter watching sputtered for a moment or two unable to decide what to do. Okay, thought Peter, T. Odinson, T. for Thor, Thor's kid… yeah. Babysitting Thor's kid. Thor's kid who thinks the Hulk is a fun playmate. Peter ran to his bedroom to suit up.

They were sitting on top of a high rise. A mischievous but victorious 5 year old was doing handstands in the shadow of the overhang of the skyscraper. Spidey rested his head on his hand watching Robin. "You're trouble in a tiny package." They watched as Shield hauled off an unconscious Rhino.

"Spidey, thanks for playing with me!" Robin tackled Spiderman in a hug, a rather terrifying feat when you're twenty stories up.

"So your webbing is chemical?" Robin prattled on. "I have the formula for some super cool smoke ampoules. Everyone calls them smoke bombs but technically they're ampoules. They'll obscure quite a large space. Would you be interested in a technology trade if I promised your webbing would never be used on this earth?"

Peter and Robin ended up geeking out at Peter's lab for the next hour or two until Thor called asking where they were.

"So was he any trouble?" asked Thor who was still trying to impersonate a biker.

The grapple gun, cape and vest were tucked away as was the Spidey suit.

"Umm… I can't really say I was a good boy today. I kind of wandered off," admitted Robin.

"We sorted it out," said Peter.

Robin giggled.

Thor looked suspicious.

Robin sneezed.

Thor felt his forehead. "You feel warm."

"I'm okay," protested Robin. "I'm sure it's just a bit of a cold."

Back at the tower even though it was very late, they had cake. He was given the birthday card, which had travelled so very far to get to him and Robin talked to Batman and Red Robin who both wished him a happy birthday.

The Avengers had talked about whether or not to get Robin presents. The final decision was that anything big would be cruel for the plan was to get him home and it was unlikely he would take anything much with him. They gave Robin stickers and glow sticks, a super bounce ball and little things like that.

It was obviously all eclipsed by the birthday card from home. Robin hid in Thor's closet with a glow stick and a borrowed magnifying glass to read it.

There was a hidden code, inside the envelope, disguised in a pattern that looked decorative.

The coded message from Batman:

Your new identity has been fashioned to protect you and honor your past. The back-story is as outrageous as Brucie has always been.

A press release to be distributed on your return states I fathered a child with eggs frozen by the mother of my deceased ward in order that his family name live on and to have a child in my life again.

Barbara has agreed to participate to offer you added protection. She lost the use of her legs after an attack by the Joker five years ago.

She will claim that during her rehab period she despaired that her injury would prevent her from ever becoming a mother, rebelled against her loss of independence and agreed to carry you as a surrogate mother when she overheard my plans. In the surrogacy agreement, I am the custodial parent but she retains parental rights.

The hidden pregnancy will be explained by: lap blankets, body shape changes from the drastic lifestyle change and premature birth.

Due to the inevitable scandal you have been kept secret until now, when you are due to start junior kindergarten.

Dick, I understand you are five not four. You were always short for your age and everything works better if we tell people you are four. You need to be four for Barbara to have been age of consent. I'll have one less year of hiding you from the public to explain including why you weren't in junior kindergarten last year. You won't be like other four or five year olds anyway.

We'll keep your birthday as today. It's March 4th here. Happy Birthday.

C.P.S. (Child Protective Services) won't hover over us like they have if you are biologically mine. Also, you'll have Barbara if anything happens to me and C.P.S. won't be able to touch her either. I'm sure Jim will make a wonderful grandfather though things may get rocky for a while as Barbara will be springing all of this on him. You'll keep a connection to your biological mother. Finally, it explains why you look like Richard Grayson.

Wonder Woman chose your new first name. It is from the Greek to tame. I believe this is intended to be in reference to your positive influence on me. Your new name will be Damian Grayson-Wayne.

Timothy Drake was officially adopted two years after your birth.

Robin read the coded letter several times. He liked the hyphenated last name. He was less sure about the name Damian. Impersonating a four year old made him giggle. Now, he'd be four and five and soon thirteen and twenty. If anyone tried to question him under truth serum they'd assume he was immune the moment they asked his age. It would be nice not to be a full head shorter than everyone his age.

Robin couldn't help but think of the "I'm my own Grandpa" song when he realized he'd be his own brother.

Batman was right about one thing. It was a commonly held belief that Bruce was an eccentric airhead prone to extravagant and ill thought out gestures when it came to his private life. The press would love the crazy story.

It reminded him of sitting with Roy and Wally going through the Saturday edition of the Gotham Examiner looking for the most outrageous "Only in Gotham," story they could find to one up each other.

Had he really been old enough once to think the newspaper was interesting?

Babs was in a wheelchair now. Robin couldn't picture it. He frowned. Babs was supposed to be just a little older than him and a gymnast: practicing flips, cartwheels, round offs and handsprings and… Robin smeared away a few tears. His new mom loved gymnastics she could help him learn more? Would that make Babs sad or happy? What was she like as a grown-up? He'd have to ask Bear what he thought.

What they were doing to Commissioner Gordon was cruel. Robin wondered if Jim secretly knew most of their secrets and played dumb because he believed in Batman. What would he make of it when Barbara came to him telling him of a hidden pregnancy with Bruce Wayne of all people? Robin suspected the man was shrewder than most people realized.

Robin touched the words one last time. He'd have to destroy the envelope and the decoded message in the morning. Bruce had rambled on about why he did things and honestly it sounded mostly to Robin like blah, big word, big word, blah, blah.

What Robin took from the letter was very different than what was written but speaking Bruce/Batman was an art form.

 _…I want everyone to know you are my son this time. I want you to have my name but I know how proud you are of your heritage so I want to give you some of your own name too. I want you to be surrounded by people who love and care for you your whole life through. You're more important to me than other people's opinions of me._

That was what Robin took from Batman's letter.

Robin smiled then he sneezed.

Thor sitting outside the closet called, "It's bed time. It is several hours past bedtime actually. Doctor Banner gave me a fever reducer for you. I'm sorry but you'll have to miss the last day of camp. Bruce said you should have a quiet day tomorrow."

"Faðir Thor, it's just a cold," protested Robin.

Thor tucked Robin in triple snug.

Robin had a feeling he was in for a mild cold and a rather nasty bout of overprotective fussing.

 **Bonus Tweet**

Not all of Robin's day had started horrible. It was only when things were too quiet that he'd had a rough time.

When Robin woke up first thing on the morning of his Birthday he did what he always did. He got a juice box from the fridge and headed to the transmitter to see if anyone was there. As soon a he entered Tony's workshop, he heard muttering.

"Red is half past midnight really the only time I can talk to him?"

"Bats will have my hide if he finds out I let you in the cave!" answered Red. "And stop touching stuff!"

"Hello?" called Robin.

"Robin you've swallowed a chipmunk!" an astonished voice shrieked startled.

"KF?!"

"In the disembodied voice if not in the flesh," answered Kid Flash laughing delightedly. "Oh Birdie, I've missed you!"

"Your voice is deeper," chirped Robin.

"Yeah well… I probably swallowed a tuba or something. Are you okay? Really okay and, and you remember me? Red was saying you don't remember everything…"

"I remember you Dufus. Nobody, nothing, no how could make me forget," reassured Robin.

"Happy Birthday to you…" warbled Wally torturing everyone in the vicinity with a loud, off key rendition of the age-old song.

"Don't you dare 'are you one, are you two' me! No one may ever 'are you one, are you two' me again or we'll be here all day arguing!" Robin called out jokingly.

"Arty and I are getting married this summer. I already asked Arsenal to be my best man. Uh, well, you were dead or deadish. But, I want you there with me. When it got out you were turning five, Artemis went all weddingy and would you do ring bearer?"

"Eloquent as usual. Beat me off with a stick to keep me away. But… Artemis?"

"Um, yeah, well…"

Robin could practically hear Wally blushing.

"Bat alert clear out!" whispered Red.

Robin heard the distinctive zip hum of a speedster running and smiled.


	21. Fuss-pots

_Because, actually I've got no excuse for this chapter. It's a random mish-mash of requests..._

Robin slept right through his normal 5 o'clock wake up. Sleeping in was what he needed. Not only wasn't he feeling great but also between the fever and the medicine, he'd slept poorly. He'd had some really weird dreams. When he woke screaming and then laughing uncontrollably until he started crying while sort of awkwardly smiling, he'd really freaked out Thor. The tired old dream of his parents falling had replayed.

He ended up laughing because Megan's influence had quite determinedly changed the ending. Instead of the ordinary gruesome end, a flying pink unicorn had caught everyone at the last minute, and flown them up to heaven. They'd waved bye-bye and blown kisses. *

Thor was driving Bruce insane.

"Thor a fever is his body's healthy response to illness. I know Natasha and Clint didn't run a fever when this hit them but he's five. His immune system is immature so it works a little differently. A fever is his body's first line of defense. It's nothing to panic over. And strange dreams are pretty normal with a fever. There is no need to be concerned about madness," reassured Bruce trying not to roll his eyes.

Peter called from camp when Robin didn't show up. After talking to Peter, Steve was upset.

Batman and Red Robin had discretely adjusted their patrol schedule to accommodate Robin's early morning calls. They were worried when he didn't show up. Batman was waiting on the transmitter when Tony blearily wandered into the workshop at 8:00 which would have been 3:00 in the morning their time.

After talking to Batman, Tony installed a microphone next to the transmitter and programmed Jarvis to respond if no one was near and contact someone in case of emergency. Apparently Batman had done something similar weeks ago. Tony who didn't particularly like being up before noon, left for his plane muttering, "Batman thinks he's soooo smart, put a microphone next to the transmitter, set up a computer answer service.. La-dee-Batman-la…. It's not even that clever."

This freaking summer bug is evil, thought Bruce. The utter nonsense everyone had already gone through because of it was bad enough. Natasha was enhanced. She almost never got sick. Shield panicked. It made sense that Robin would get hit with it as soon as he started playing with children his own age but that didn't mean Bruce had to like it. It had been less than fun being interrogated by Batman. Oh goodness gracious here came Thor again. Bruce ducked into the washroom.

Robin padded into the kitchen for a juice box at around 9:30 am. Auntie Tasha and Mr. Barton had already left to do spy type things and Tony had said last night that he was heading to Japan in the morning to take care of business with Ms. Potts. "Where are Thor and Uncle Steve?" Robin asked Bruce.

"I sent them to the gym to pound on each other for a while. They were being insufferable," explained Bruce. "What would you like for breakfast?"

"Oatmeal please," answered Robin. "Why were they being insufferable?"

"Oh, I'm sure you'll find out soon enough," answered Bruce putting a small serving of oatmeal in the microwave for Robin. "Batman wants you to stop by the transmitter at noon and let him know how you're feeling."

"Jarvis can you warn me 15 minutes before noon?" called Robin.

"It would contradict my programming to wake you if you are ill," Jarvis warned. "I am to do what I can to keep you from harm."

"Oh dear," declared Bruce. "You're even going to be fussed at by the house AI." Noticing Robin was wearing his watch, Bruce discretely checked Robin's temperature on one of the many computer terminals. Bruce put another dose of fever reducer in front of Robin without saying anything. He watched as the boy downed it wordlessly. Bruce brought him his blanket, a tissue box and garbage when he curled up in front of the TV. Robin was back asleep pretty quickly.

Bruce went back to his lab to get some work done. Hopefully the child would get another hour or two of sleep before the mother hens got finished sparing.

After lunch, Robin found out what Bruce meant by insufferable. He'd had a nice long sleep. He was feeling pretty good at the moment so he wanted to play with his violin. Robin tried to explain matters to Thor who panicked because Dr. Banner said he'd need a quiet day and the violin wasn't quiet. Robin looked up at Thor incredulous. "But, he, um… that's not. It's not about volume."

Robin looked around. Bruce was hiding. Thor honestly looked freaked out. Robin slowly put the violin away, o-k-a-y.

Then Steve asked Robin why he didn't say about camp and getting lost and spending the whole day in wet clothes. "It would have been a good day for you to have someone who understood keeping an eye out for you and then there were the robots. Ironman had ended up dictating that email to Jarvis mid-battle in a last minute attempt to avoid having Shield soldiers pick you up. Fury offered when Thor was going to just take off and…"

Robin shushed Steve who looked distressed. "Here, hug Bear," Robin demanded. Robin had moved on. He'd lived with heroes most of his life. Evil Robots just happened. No good, rotten days just happened.

"Uncle Steve, I'm not sick because I spent all day in the rain. I'm sick because kindergarteners don't wash their hands, they sneeze on you and drink from your juice box when you're not looking and in general we're a cesspool of germs but because we're little we catch every stupid bug that's going around." Robin explained matter-of-factly.

Steve blinked stupidly. Looked at Bear. Looked at Robin.

It would have been fine if that was the end of it but they were like dogs worrying a bone.

"But I don't want another juice box. I'm not thirsty. No, the one blanket was enough. Don't you guys have bad guys to go fight? I don't need another pillow. I am fine! I just have to go pee! After three juice boxes a fellow's generally got business to take care of and I can go to the washroom all by myself!" Robin sat on the other side of the bathroom door and huffed in relief. Batman's 20 questions of fussiness had been bad enough but Thor and Steve were overwhelming. Robin could hear them fussing on the other side of the door.

"He's pale," observed Thor.

"But he's flushed too," added Steve.

"How can you be pale and flushed? Isn't that twice as bad?" Thor wanted to know.

"I wonder if I should get him some vapor rub. Ma used that on me when I was young and feeling poorly. Maybe milk of magnesia?" asked Steve.

"Milk of Magnesia is used to treat indigestion," corrected Jarvis. "With the quantity of juice he has consumed it would be very diuretic."

Bruce came and quietly knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you going to the washroom or are you hiding?" he asked quietly.

"They broke the window in the lounge when they were fighting over whether I needed fresh air or should be out of the draft," explained Robin.

"A lot of stuff gets broken around here," agreed Bruce.

"Thor wanted me to drink this garlic, beet and lichen broth."

"He's never been sick a day in his life," reminded Bruce.

"I don't like the soggy wash cloth."

"Steve's old fashioned. It's what he knows," explained Bruce.

"Thor freaked out when I wanted to play cards"

"I think that would be a Gotham villain issue," proposed Bruce.

So Bruce took Robin into the infirmary locked the door and they colored, played cards, danced hip hop to a few tunes until Robin was pleasantly tired and felt like another nap. Bruce looked over at the research he was supposed to be working on. Oh well. Since he was pretty sure Thor and Steve could handle it if Robin just wanted to nap, he unlocked the infirmary door and Robin sneaked off to nap in front of the television. If you couldn't nap in front of the television when you were sick you were doing it wrong.

Bruce turned around to go get some real work done on his research. Uh, oh, Thor and Steve… Bruce looked at the crayons, and cards still scattered over the floor.

"I'm sure I heard you croaking out 'Better When I'm Dancing' and thumping around with Robin. I thought you said he needed a quiet day?" accused Thor.

"He normally spends hours sparing, dancing, flipping, swinging from assorted objects and climbing anything he can find. He spent 15 minutes dancing. Kids are pretty good at listening to their bodies," Bruce meekly tried to explain.

"If he gets worse I'm holding YOU responsible," Thor threatened.

"Why'd you lock us out?" asked Steve. "We were really worried."

"The window in the Lounge is insecure and Robin is in that room," reported Jarvis.

:::::::::::::::::

Dr. Bruce Banner had reluctantly explained that Robin was likely to get worse before he got better. Just what Batman and the world's fussiest heroes needed to hear thought Robin hiding behind Bear because everyone was staring at him. He stared at the transmitter.

Batman explained to Robin that he was going to be out of town for a few days. He could call when he was feeling up to it; it just might take a little while for someone to answer the transmitter.

Robin knew Batman using the wording "out of town" was code for going on a mission. Robin wondered if Batman was really going "out of town" or if it was a ploy to make him stay in bed or if it was a double bat-ploy and Batman was doing both things, a mission and trying to make him stay in bed. Robin glared at the transmitter then hugged Bear and turned to go to bed.

"Extra air hugs then in case we don't talk for a while, night," Robin croaked coughing.

"Kiddo you sound awful." Robin heard Batman/Bruce softly whisper. The gravely voice changer did a poor job of hiding that Bruce was talking and not Batman.

The next day Robin got bored really fast. Various Avengers played games with him and put up with the tiny violin and did math problems? What kid did math problems for fun when they were feeling sick?

Thor needed something to do that gave Robin a little breathing room so Dr. Banner gave Thor a list of pediatric items to add to the infirmary so that it would be fully stocked in case of any emergency then sent him shopping. "What are popsicles? Will these be at the medical supply facility?"

Bruce discovered their young friend loved chemistry too. Robin sat on the floor of his lab washing old beakers in a basin of soapy water.

"What are you making this time?" Bruce asked.

"Adhesive pomimer," Robin answered.

Bruce smiled but didn't point out it was pronounced polymer.

Chemistry had been a bad idea. Bruce's afternoon was spent wiping Robin's nose as everyone that was home tried to chip the boy free from a giant ball of pink polymer.

"I have to go pee-pee" Robin whined getting a little desperate.

Peter stopped by to visit Robin. ** The smoke bombs had been amazing. Robin had seemed an odd mix of teenager, little kid, awesome and trouble. They'd just connected. Peter found that a little embarrassing considering Robin was five. He wanted to know how the little guy was feeling. Jarvis let him in and directed him up to the lab.

Peter's eyes widened at what he found. The first words out of his mouth were, "Can this stuff be chemically deactivated?" Peter immediately started giving the formula a quick once over.

"I don't remember," moaned Robin miserably. "Probably."

Thor came back from his shopping trip. "What foolishness have you wrought upon my sick child?" Thor demanded of Bruce looking alarmed.

"I sneezed when I was adding the last ingredient and this happened!" Robin explained morosely. Only his head and shoulders were free. The rest of him was encased in a bubbly mound of pink foam. "ACHooo!"

A seriously embarrassed emergency call was put in to Batman who gave them the formula to deactivate the polymer. If you could hear eyes rolling over a transmitter… Batman didn't call them idiots like Fury would have but somehow he didn't need to resort to insults. He just asked really basic questions. His voice dropped deeper with every answer.

"So you aren't familiar with that polymeric formula but thought it was an appropriate experiment for a young child?"

"You don't know how to deactivate it?"

"Robin why weren't you adding the ingredients behind a fume hood or containment shield?"

"Robin do you even remember protocols for measuring out ingredients?"

"Measure the critical or dangerous ingredients into a separate container. Reseal the original container then proceed." Dr. Banner and Peter recited in tandem. Bruce Banner was completely mortified by this whole situation. Robin was astonishingly capable, intelligent and self reliant until suddenly he wasn't. You had to be so careful not to forget that he was, at his core, a five-year old.

"Did Robin do that? Robin did you?"

Robin started hiccupping in distress. He really didn't like getting in trouble with Batman. Hiccupping while stuck in adhesive polymer foam was uncomfortable.

"Do you realize what would have happened if it had engulfed his head?"

Robin free at last, bathed, in new pj's, and dosed with medicine, fell asleep on the sofa after five minutes playing Mario Kart with Peter.

"Good call on the chemical deactivation," praised Bruce tiredly.

"Your assistance was timely and welcome," added Thor.

"I'm going to head home. I think he's done for the night even if it is only five o'clock," spoke Peter ruffling his hand through Robin's hair. Though he wondered who Batman was, he knew better than to ask too many questions when you were a guest at what was essentially Avengers headquarters.

"You should come back when he's actually free to play," snickered Clint.

"Dude that pun was terrible. How about I'll leave my game system here and come back and play with him a little tomorrow," offered Peter. Robin had been thrilled to see Peter.

Monday night Tony was back. He was working late in his workshop still stuck on Japan time. Robin who'd been coughing so much he'd gotten up to get a drink, came to check out what he was doing and fell asleep in the big old office chair. Tony put a blanket over him and left him there because he seemed to be breathing easier and coughing less sitting up. He headed off to bed at around 3 am.

"Jarvis, dim the lights but keep an eye on him okay?"

About half an hour later, "Hey?"

Robin woke to a gruff stranger's voice from the transmitter.

"Hello?" the stranger called.

Robin coughed and answered, "Hello. Who is this?"

"I... I just wanted to check that things were okay over there. There was some trouble on this side and I just… I was just checking." It sounded like a young man's voice to Robin.

"It's quiet here," answered Robin sleepily. "What happened?"

"The… the Joker. Nobody is hurt. Well, no one that counts. The Joker might have a slug or two of lead in him but even he cleared out and honest the son of a b- b- gun is still breathing. He had this plan and well… I couldn't let him. He's already killed one Robin. He's not Fu-ssing with another on my watch." The voice was both aggressive and defensive.

"Who are you?" asked Robin coughing.

"That's a nasty sounding cough."

"Aren't you going to tell me who you are?" Robin asked. "It doesn't have to be your real name. What would you like me to call you?"

There was a soft huff from the other end of the transmitter and a long silence. "Just call me J." ***

"Jay? Okay. I'm Robin! We both have bird names that's fun."

"I kinda guessed who you were. This whole thing with you is like the worst kept League secret ever." Jay's voice was deep, rough and very tentative like he wasn't sure he should be speaking, and he didn't want anyone hear him.

"What did Joker do this time? He's got to be stopped. First I find out he killed my brother who I never got to meet and my very best girl friend can't walk because of him? Uh…" Robin at five was not as good as he once had been at identity secrets.

"You're too little to have a chick." Jay whispered with a snort.

"I wonder what my brother was like," spoke Robin trying to change the subject. He'd meant friend who was a girl not girlfriend, hmph the nerve of some people. The brother thing was a rhetorical question but Jay answered.

"He was rough around the edges but he tried so f-antastically hard. There was no pleasing the Bat who was like this big ass-tronomical legend. Bats most of the time wouldn't even look at him."

"Maybe it was the uniform?" suggested Robin. "I think if my brother was going to work with Batman he should have gotten to pick his own name and design a costume and well, that stuff's fun and the nights are hard work. A guy earns being looked at and seen as his own person."

Jay stuttered brokenly "I,… he dyed his hair and cut it to look like …"

"He needed to be his own person. I'm sure it was a pretty awesome person. He must have shone very brightly in someway, if Batman could see him at all in the darkness he must have been in, those first few years." Robin had heard the slip up but dared not ask to confirm what he thought.

"Listen kid. You gotta tell Batman to check the Boomtube really carefully. I followed him, eh Joker that is, all the way here to New York and I don't know that he has done anything but just make sure Bats checks okay."

"You're not going to talk to him?" asked Robin confused.

"He shoulda… He should have killed that S.O.B. Joker. I got nothing to say to him." Jay declared bitterly.

"Joker's been trying to remake Batman in his own image forever. The Joker would be so happy if Batman killed him. It would give the criminals so much power. Batman would loose all credabibity and he'd become what he's tried his whole life to escape," Robin answered.

"That's not good enough. He needs to end. Joker needs to end."

"Die? He's become a Gotham anti-legend. He's this big horrible thing and everyone gets so wrapped up in him. I can't stand it. The only thing I can think that would help would be if he died in some boring and dumb way that nobody could say had anything to do with justice, crime or drama. He should choke on a hotdog or have an amourism."

"Fall is love with himself and die? I think you mean aneurism," some of the bitterness had fallen away from the voice in the darkness. It sounded tentatively fond.

There was silence between them for a long while then Robin kind of whimpered.

"Kid?"

"He's scary and it's dark and quiet and really, really late. I'm so cold."

"I was told Robin was fearless," Jay whispered gently.

Robin fell to coughing for a long while. There was a dull thud as Robin fainted.

"Kid, are you okay? Baby Bird?"

"Robin is in need of medical assistance. He is located in the work shop," Jarvis announced over the general address system. The dispassion of his address gave him away as a computer.

The voice on the other side of the transmitter was silent but if the Avengers had been listening for it when they came for Robin, if the connection was good enough, they might have heard breathing.

When Robin woke up in his own bed. He groaned as he realized the soggy washcloth was back.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

"I need a status report," demanded Batman gruffly.

Robin giggled, "I'm getting better."

"Failure is not an option."

"Sir, Yes Sir!" Robin saluted and then sneezed.

"Bless you," Batman ordered in a deep scary growl.

Robin giggled again.

"I don't really need to tell you to double check the Boomtube, do I?" Robin asked for he knew Batman too well enough to assume all communications over the Tesseract frequency were recorded and monitored.

"No."

"Does Red know?"

"Robin, he's dangerous," warned Batman.

"It sounded like he needed a friend," protested Robin, but Robin let it drop for now. The connection was not secure and if Batman was making sure Red didn't even know the second Robin was alive, it was probably far too complicated to hope to understand a universe away and trying to keep from spilling secrets.

 **Don't tell me I don't listen to my reviewers when I can.**

*BabyRainbowBunny (One flying unicorn as per order)

**TimeforMoo, Fangirlnerd001 (I feel like there were more folks requesting more Spidey sorry if you're not listed)

***Princess Of Flames (Jason as per request, to the rescue and trying very hard and very awkwardly to mind his language around a little kid.)


	22. A Friend Indeed

_Because resistance is futile. The puppy dog eyes are not the only weapon in his arsenal._

The second trial of the Justice League Boom Tube still involved many Shield soldiers armed to the teeth.

Robin was sent to spend the day on the other side of the city in Peter's care. Robin upgraded Peter's computer for maximum hero on a minimum dime then showed Peter tricks to get better intelligence before responding to emergency situations. Peter showed Robin how web dispensers could be controlled and they practiced with them. Robin showed Peter how his grapple gun worked. Both boys were disappointed when Thor came to retrieve Robin.

The portal test runs were coordinated, timed and involved shared technology. "How are you communicating with them?" Fury demanded of Stark.

Tesseract transmitter could not leave Avenger's control. The technology was too dangerous. Stark asked. "Did you know they have psychics that can communicate with a willing mind."

"The Martians have been mentioned. Can they force their way into an unwilling mind?" asked Fury.

"I've never talked to one when I didn't want to," Stark replied.

"We want to talk to them," insisted Fury.

"Mostly folks on the other side talk to Robin," answered Stark. "If the little guy doesn't trust you, they're not going to want to chat."

Fury looked at the machine gun toting soldiers milling around the Tower and thought back to the kidnapping and the Shield broadcasts refusing to cooperate with terrorists. His superiors weren't going to like this. They wanted control of these tests. They wanted control of communications to the other universe.

Shield had taken a more active roll in Tower defense and problems with Hydra had stopped. A world of unknown potential, capable of creating a dimensional portal, with reasonable cause to be very angry, was requesting the return of it's citizen. The government would have been foolhardy not to do it's best to show good will. Shield now had an entire special forces team assigned to ensuring hostiles did not have access to Robin and like Thor, Robin had been tagged with diplomatic immunity. Robin didn't know any of this but the Avengers knew and appreciated the change in attitude.

The Boom Tube picked up and received the Avenger test pod confirming the portal worked both ways. Dr. Banner's radiation shielding worked beautifully. Tony's efforts to overcome the forces involved in transit failed. Gravity, mass, acceleration and time ceased the follow known rules the moment things got trans-dimensional. The Justice League would take Tony's designs and their best tech experts would try their ideas.

Pepper loved photography. She tucked some pictures of Robin into the information packet that had been sent. The Cad drawings of Robin detailing all his proportions, his weight and center of gravity, other information was considered too secret to transfer over the radio connection but needed to design and construct an appropriate restraint and support system were good but Pepper believed photographs were soul food that Robin's family needed.

Life wasn't all seriousness and science.

Robin had defeated Thor in the act of shopping.

Thor was the Crown Prince of the Asgard, his son was going to get a nice suit. They went to the shopping mall. The first time Robin disappeared, Thor found him in the video game store shouting pew-pew! and demolishing all competition in a video game. The second time, he was hiding in the clothing racks playing sock puppets and chatting to himself. The third time, he was in the pet store. He'd climbed into the puppy bin and was earnestly explaining how he was allowed in the puppy bin because the puppies liked him. The store clerk seemed unconvinced.

With Robin's hand in a very firm grip, Thor headed back to the suit store but Robin was hungry now. The food court was on the other end of the mall. Two chicken nuggets and three slices of apple later Robin was too full to finish his lunch. They'd just gotten back to the suit store when Robin announced he had to go to the bathroom. The bathroom was back at the food court.

"No more running off," Thor had scolded firmly but the mall environment was so distracting to the child it was like he was talking to a feather in the wind.

"Look Faðir Thor that kid's got you shoes! I didn't know they made shoes with your picture on them." Thor hauled Robin back from following after the boy with the light up Thor shoes.

"I was talking to you."

"Were you? What were you saying? Was it about... Oh look ice cream!" Thor hauled him back again.

Robin disappeared a fourth time. Mall security paged Thor having found Robin climbing in the rafters trying to get an Iron Man balloon down for a bawling child. The fifth time Thor found Robin going around and around and around in a revolving door laughing delightedly. He'd spun so many times so fast that when Thor forcibly removed the small child from the revolving door, Robin threw up on some poor woman's shoe. Robin then declared "I'm tired. Can we go home now?" They'd been shopping for five hours and had tried on nothing. Robin flopped on the floor shamelessly.

"Get up!" insisted Thor embarrassed.

Robin dragged his feet in a melodramatically tired fashion over to the mall fountain and trailed his hand in the water then grabbed a shiny coin he from in the water. "Look what I found!"

"Those are supposed to stay in the fountain," Thor hissed embarrassed.

Robin threw it into the center of the fountain and then happily grabbed other coins near the edge flinging them helpfully into the center of the fountain too. He smiled up at Thor showing him how helpfully he was being. He was certainly a bit soggier than he'd been before but Robin liked to help.

Thor wasn't smiling.

Robin's face fell and he took his arm out of the water. "Not,... not what you meant?"

Thor grabbed the first suit he saw, eyeballed it compared to Robin's size and bought it.

Tony thought he looked pretty darn good in the black tie and tails. The charity ball was full formal. "Now that's what I call doin' the duds justice!" he bragged straightening his tie and taking Pepper's arm and leading her into the Tower ballroom already mostly filled with guests.

When Thor came in holding Robin's hand, every lady in the room including Pepper turned to mush.

"That is so not fair," complained Tony. "It's a freaking Walmart suit! How'd he do that wearing a Walmart suit? It's made of polyester and has a clip on bow tie!"

"Hi, Mr. Stark! Look, Bear's wearing a bow tie!" chirped Robin happily, holding up Bear.

Tony Stark looked incredulous and protesting at the saccharin cuteness of it.

Robin didn't know very many people so he ran up to Pepper the first person he recognized. "Miss Potts, you look so pretty!" He gave her a very elegant bow. "Would you like to dance with me?"

"Of course sweetie," answered Pepper with a gentle smile.

Tony made angry choking hands after Robin. Thor bellowed out a deep laugh and thumped Tony on the back as Robin led Pepper out onto the dance floor. "He's been practicing his dance moves all summer!" Thor teased.

"And he smells like apple pie," teased Natasha brushing past with Clint on her arm. Thor had taken Robin apple picking to get him out from under foot while the tower was being prepared for the Summer Gala. It was Tony's biggest charity fundraiser of the season. All the proceeds went to a special disaster relief fund.

"He should be picking his nose, pigging out at the buffet, crying for his mother, telling bad knock-knock jokes and running around like a hooligan," protested Tony. It only got worse. Robin had polished party manners and someone, somewhere had trained the twerp to be an incurable flatterer in several different language. The ladies loved him. Thor watched from the sidelines with a beer in one hand and Bear in the other. Apparently he was on Bear duty. Thor really didn't mind. This really wasn't his kind of party at least that was what he thought until Jane showed up in a beautiful blue flowing dress.

"Friend Steve,... hold Bear," spoke Thor, putting down the beer with a smile. "Lady Jane, what a pleasure this is. I knew not of your coming."

Jane Foster smiled. "A little bird invited me down. Paid for plane ticket too. Is that him? I thought he'd be older."

Thor looked over at Robin perplexed. Robin, who was not so discretely watching, grinned, gave him a cheeky thumbs up, then went back to dancing.

"How..." Thor looked thoroughly baffled.

Jane smiled, "He said something about money from a circus and that you had been kind. He checked my schedule, then bought me a non-refundable ticket. How does one say no to a little guy that just spent, probably his whole life savings to arrange a special day for someone he cares about?"

"I don't believe anyone around here has figured out how to say no to him with respect to anything he has set his heart upon," answered Thor looking from Robin to Jane in amazement.

"I'll watch Robin for the evening," encouraged Steve. "Go have fun."

Thor wondered how Robin had even learned about Jane.

Apparently the Lady Jane was quite impressed that he would rescue and care for a child displaced from another universe. Thor hadn't bragged but Robin had spoken on his behalf.

Later that evening, Steve Rogers, Robin and Nick Fury, who often showed at this kind of event when all of the Avengers would be in the public eye, sat off to the side around a small table talking.

"How did you find out about Miss Foster?" asked Fury.

"I'm an incurable snoop and Thor has love letters in his desk," answered Robin guilelessly. "It's not even locked."

Steve laughed and ruffled Robin's hair. "No one knew the circus paid you for the shows you did."

"I know Mr. Stark has paid my way for almost everything and I probably should have just given the money to him but what's he gonna do with my two-pence?" asked Robin.

Tony stopped by with a drink in hand. "Kid, I don't think you could have spent your money any better."

One of Robin's favorite songs came on and he ran off to dance.

Fury turned to Steve, "You lot trust him. You don't find it odd, the things he can do linked perfectly with a form that looks so defenseless and triggers parental instincts? He's spoken six different languages in the time I've been watching him. He admitted that he's been snooping around."

Steve looked at Nick Fury sadly. "I know they pay you to think that way but kids are curious. Can you honestly tell me that you never went through your parents drawers when you were a kid? I did. If you had to pick one person to depend on to save the world would you pick the an average Joe or someone exceptional. Yes, he's extraordinary but he doesn't appear to be hiding it."

Fury looked unconvinced but that didn't surprise Steve.

"Don't you see? Robin gave Thor the one thing he himself wants most in the world," Steve tried to explain.

"And what is it you think Robin wants," asked Nick.

"To be with the ones he loves."

Thor with Jane on his arm came looking for Robin as the evening drew to a close.

"Relax," encouraged Steve. "I told you I'd look out for him."

"Where is he?" inquired Thor. "I haven't seen him for the last hour."

Steven went over to the table with the chocolate fountain on it and lifted the table cloth. Robin was fast asleep under the table with a plate full of strawberries tops. A small flock of napkin swans were arranged around him as if he has been playing with them. Bear was tucked under one arm.

"Did he eat anything tonight but chocolate strawberries?" asked Thor.

"The chocolate had some kind of liquor in it. Robin gave it one sniff then wouldn't touch it so actually he just ate strawberries and he drank those little milkers from the coffee service. He thought they were very entertaining so he drank maybe twenty of them," answered Steve. "He was doing shots with Natasha."

"Natasha was drinking milkers?" asked Tony confused. (Frankly, Tony was more than a little hammered.)

"Natasha was drinking vodka. Robin was drinking milkers," answered Steve patiently.

Thor climbed under the table and lifted Robin out.

Steve took Robin from Thor. "I told you, I got him. Go take you lady friend for a walk on the beach or something. He can sleep in my room tonight."

"He cries in his sleep sometimes. If you rub his back, he quiets down and sleeps more soundly," spoke Thor.

"I got him. He's fine," reassured Steve.

"Wake him to relieve himself before putting him down for the night. He.."

"Thor, he'll be fine. I got this," insisted Steve. Robin the limp noodle thankfully slept through Thor's fussing. When he'd been sick, yes, he'd wet the bed, once! (actually it was three times) No it was ONCE! (three times) Everyone had been force feeding him liquids, he had a bad cough and a fever of 105 ...stuff, happened... You don't go spreading that sort of information around! Robin had quite the face off with Thor over it. Heroes don't wear pull-ups. Apparently, gods didn't much like doing laundry.

"I'll just be a moment," spoke Thor to Jane. He returned to his rooms and retrieved Robin's pajamas, toothbrush and the charger for his watch.

In the early hours of the morning Thor admitted to Jane, "Eventually, we send him home. That has always been the plan. I want it for him and yet it grieves me."

"I'd think you a callus fool if you thought any differently and I just met the little guy," answered Jane.

The gala had been a nice distraction but soon enough it was back to business as usual.

Shield had demanded Stark create a device to identify portals. It was an easy build. Shield didn't have control over when or where portals opened and Loki had set a disturbing precedent when he almost destroyed the world with a portal, so Tony built a portal detector. He made sure it wasn't sensitive enough to detect the pinhole portal for the transmitter. The prototype was running on the work table. The finished product was on the Helicarrier.

Tony and Bruce were the only Avengers in the Tower today. Robin was sitting out of the way in the workshop brushing up on one of his forgotten languages with Jarvis. Batman and Red Robin hadn't been available in the morning. Something very big was happening on the other side. Agent A had been waiting at the transmitter for the early morning call. His encouragement to Robin not to worry as Batman and Red Robin had things well in hand, made Robin worry. Robin hadn't left the workshop all morning. Tony had even tried bribing him with ice cream. He'd told Robin about the swimming pool in the first sub-basement complete with waterfall and party lights! "Banner can take you swimming." Robin wouldn't leave the workshop.

"Come on kid, I set it up so Jarvis will tell you if anyone calls. That's what that microphone is for," Tony was working on something really tricky and he didn't want distractions.

Robin turned the puppy dog eyes on Tony. Tony threw his hand up in the air, conceded defeat and went to get another cup of coffee muttering about getting Robin to chill out being completely impossible. He slammed a warm milk down beside Robin on his way back. "Drink that, do yoga, say Ohmmm... or something! Hug the blasted bear." (Robin was already hugging Bear.)

When the portal alarm went off Tony and Robin were right on top of it. Tony had Jarvis focus a satellite on the location and brought up a visual. Robin went rigid for about ten seconds and then ran to the transmitter.

"Batman! This is Robin. I have an emergency. Suspected code amber, hero down. Batman, come in Batman!" Robin called. Bear lay abandoned on the floor.

"Robin report," answered Batman literally seconds later.

"Kid what's going on?" demanded Tony.

Robin held up a hand to forestall Tony. "Just a moment Mr. Stark."

"Batman we registered a portal in the high Arctic. The visual looks like Kid Flash. He's not moving. Can you confirm it is KF. I don't think we have anyway to get there in time but if it is KF, the Boom Tube gets through to here. Someone invulnerable could make the trip," Robin pleaded.

There were a few moments of silence while Batman's communicator was tuned to a different channel. Batman confirmed that Kid Flash had vanished in an incident coinciding with the recent portal event.

"Put on some hearing protection and make sure the gate drop point is clear," ordered Batman. "Three minute warning."

"What's going on?" Demanded Tony.

"They're opening a gate and sending help," answered Robin. "Jarvis, over the loudspeaker, warn everyone away from the gate location. Page Dr. Banner to here. Tell him it's an emergency. Mr. Stark you need to get Shield on line and warn them this is not a hostile gate. It's a rescue."

Tony called the Ironman suit and flew down to confirm the gate area was clear.

Robin passed Dr. Banner hearing protection and told him he needed to get Batman to explain emergency medical procedures for a depleted speedster. Robin wearing clunky headphones quickly keyed in the GPS location listed on the portal detector into his watch then he ran towards the Ironman launch platform.

The Tower shook with the deafening Boom of the gate opening.

"Superman, up here!" yelled Robin.

Tony who'd been hovering nearby watched as a man in blue and red with a really impressive cape and an S on his chest, flew up to the launch platform. Superman had no visible means of propulsion? Robin handed him the watch, showed him the GPS and turned on the distress signal so they would have a priority audio feed. Like a streak of light the flying man disappeared to the north.

Tony hovering in his Ironman suit watched awestruck, even if he hadn't wanted to be impressed, Superman was seriously fast.

Robin returned to the workshop to watch the satellite feed Mr. Stark had set up showing Kid Flash laying terrifyingly still in he snow. In moments Superman was there.

"He's alive Robin. He's not in good shape but he's alive. Please tell Flash and the others. Everyone thought the MFD killed him. I'll have to return a lot more slowly and carefully. I don't want make his injuries worse."

Dr. Banner talked to Batman then hurried off to prep the infirmary.

Mr. Stark was talking to Shield. Fury was doing a lot of yelling. Stark grabbed the cardboard box and put it back on the transmitter.

Robin talked to the box. "Batman, Kid Flash is alive. Superman is bringing him here. I'll let you know more when I can but we have to shut the radio signal off because of Shield. Thank you."

Radio silence when you have a thousand questions? It's not fun.

Robin went back to the Launch platform and waited silently. Ironman was suited up beside him fielding calls from Shield.

"Kid, talk to the other Avengers and explain what's going on," demanded Tony shoving a communicator at Robin. "I can only talk to so many people at once."

Robin held the communicator to his ear looking to the North, awaiting the return of Superman. "Hey guys, Robin here. Mr. Stark thought I could answer questions."

"What is going on. Your emergency beacon went off."

"I'm sorry Faðir Thor. There was an emergency. It's been dealt with. It will be a little while before we can turn the beacon off."

"Are you okay?"

"Yes Captain. I'm okay."

"Is everyone else okay?"

"Yes Captain. Well, sort of."

"What in the nine realms does 'well sort of,' mean?"

"Faðir Thor, he's my best friend! I had to do something! I know I probably just made everything a really big mess but I don't even really know what happened yet. You guys don't move fast enough. He might have died to death. The Artic is killer cold and he looked hurt."

"Sweet heart, calm down and explain what happened."

"Auntie Tasha,.."

"Alright folks, Shield wants us all at the Tower post haste," Captain America interrupted. "I need ETA's from everyone."

The fastest anyone thought they could get back was 20 minutes. Robin who was still listening sighed. Avengers were fast but not compared to Superman or a Speedster.

 **Reviews inspire me and make me write faster. They drag me back to the story when I get distracted by other things. I realize I took a long time to update this time: March break and computer problems. Sorry.**

"died to death" - quoted from a real 5 year old.


	23. Santa and the Pancakes

_(I tried really hard to get to the end in one chapter but gave up at over 4000 words. Sorry. You'll have to put up with me for at least one week more.)_

 _Because Nick Fury was a hero for a long time and I like pancakes._

Robin took one last look to the north, then listening to Ironman pacing and talking frantically with Shield, he went back to his room and got his Robin cloths on. He looked for Bear panicking a little when he didn't see him.

When he got back to the launch platform, Ironman asked why he was all dressed up.

"Mr. Stark, I'm pretty sure I scared the government very badly bringing help from my world. Do you know where Bear is?"

Ironman shook his head no. "Fury really, do you think someone would appear unconscious, in the Arctic on purpose?" He was still talking on the radio with Shield and couldn't give Robin his full attention.

Armored assault vehicles, helicopters and soldiers were descending on the tower. The Helicarrier had still been parked in the harbor from the last portal test. Robin went and sat crisscross against in the corner of the Ironman launch pad, out of the way but where he could still see. He had hoped either Superman or a few more Avengers could have gotten back before Shield arrived. Ironman was watching him with his angry looking glowing robot eyes.

"Kiddo, can you scoot a little further from the edge of the platform for me?" Ironman asked.

"We need the boy to come with us," declared one of the armed soldiers.

"Can I just say H-E double hockey sticks NO," answered Ironman evenly.

"It's okay Mr. Stark," spoke Robin quietly. "Two surprise gates and a flying stranger is pretty scary. I don't mind going with them. I pretty sure as long as they let Dr. Banner take care of Kid Flash, Superman will come and talk with them too."

"It isn't okay," protested Ironman. His suit was detecting the child's elevated heart rate. The soldier's heart rates were elevated too. Jumpy soldiers and a terrified child pretending to be calm was anything but all right. There was even one idiot; "Stop pointing the rifle at the five year old, moron! It's loaded. He's just sitting there trying to talk me into cooperating with you."

Director Nick Fury came a few minutes later. The perpetually frowning Ironman suit leveled it's glare on him.

"Stark, this is out of my hands. These orders come from above me. It was either tow the line or get out of the way."

"I'm sorry I caused so much trouble for you Sir," Robin spoke.

"If you could let me talk to the folks on the other side, I'm sure we could clear this all up," tried Fury.

"One of them is coming back in a little while from retrieving my friend whose hurt. You can talk to him," offered Robin.

"They don't want to talk to one of the foot soldiers son."

"My name is Robin. I'm not your son. Superman is not a foot soldier," Robin frowned at the director.

Black Widow and Hawkeye returned next, then came Superman carrying Kid Flash. Superman could see how tense the situation was so he made his final approach very slow and careful. Dr. Banner pushed his way up from the infirmary pulling a gurney, having been waiting for Jarvis to alert him on Superman's return.

Dr. Banner his eyes illuminated with green had green veins running up and down his arms. As he pushed through the soldiers he grabbed the rifle from the soldier who kept pointing his gun at Robin and bent the thing in half. "Get out. I'm trying very hard right now not to loose my temper," Banner warned the soldier.

The soldier took a panicked look at his commanding officer who nodded to him then he backed out quickly and quietly.

Superman gently lay Kid Flash on the gurney.

"You and you stay," Director Fury ordered Superman and Robin. "Take the injured man for medical attention," he ordered Dr. Banner. "Accompany them," he ordered a few soldiers who followed Dr. Banner to the infirmary.

The stiff threatening silence was overwhelming. Superman smiled at Robin. Robin smiled back at him. Superman stuck his tongue out at Robin. Robin curled up into a ball giggling. Trying to fix serious, solemn expressions on their faces they looked back to Director Fury.

"May I introduce my friend?" asked Robin. "This is Superman."

"Pleased to meet you," greeted Superman with a polite nod of his head. He gave Robin a discrete little wave before returning to his heroic pose. Robin giggled again.

"Director Fury, what do you need from us?" asked Robin. "What happens next?"

Thor holding Mjölnir, landed next to Superman on the Ironman launch pad. "Thor, God of Thunder," he introduced with a nod.

"Superman, Robin's friend from the other side," Superman replied with a similar nod. Their capes were fluttering very impressively.

"Right now, we're going to wait until everyone gets here so there are no misunderstandings," suggested Fury firmly.

"Captain America said he'd be another 40 minutes. I have to pee. I'm not sitting here for another 40 minutes," protested Robin quite seriously.

Superman, Thor and Black Widow nearly lost their composure trying not to laugh.

Two soldiers were assigned to take Robin to the washroom. When he got back, he stopped beside Director Fury. "Permission to hug Superman Sir?"

"No, You'll keep your distance," barked Fury.

"Aye-Aye Captain Patchy," snarked Ironman.

Robin grinned a mischievous monkey grin and walked in exaggerated slow motion right towards Superman. Stopping him would have required manhandling him which would have escalated a potentially dangerous situation. Sometimes Fury hated his job.

When Robin got to Superman. Superman slowly knelt and lifted Robin into a hug, armed soldiers or no. Frankly, more and more of the armed soldiers seemed to be leaning on their weapons and loosing any kind of intensity they had had when they first charged up to the tower.

"I wanna hug Superman too," teased Hawkeye.

"We will be having words later!" Fury snapped at Hawkeye shaking a finger at him.

Black Widow gave Hawkeye a swat then asked, "Can we get some kind of an explanation as to what's going on now? And Director, just so you know, the Avengers have already been briefed by Robin. Superman is awesome, friendly, honest... umm guys give me a hand here, he rambles on about this guy endlessly."

"He likes fried chicken and apple pie," offered Hawkeye. "Superman's mom makes the best pie anybody ever tasted."

"He saves kittens from trees, even the grumpy scratchy ones," spoke Thor crossing his arms and looking at Fury.

"And he's always ready to help a friend in need," spoke Ironman. "So when Robin was near frantic and in tears because the prototype for the portal detector you had me build, picked up that his best friend had suddenly appeared unconscious in the Arctic, Robin wanted Superman's help, so Superman came."

"How did he get through the portal?" demanded Fury.

"I'm a fair bit more durable than a five year old child," offered Superman.

"What caused the other portal?" asked Fury.

"Do you know?" Robin asked Superman.

"I have a good guess. Kid Flash, Flash and Impulse were running together as fast as they could. Kid Flash is slightly slower, so all of the energy that was being generated kept channeling through him. I know the Speed Force is connected to dimensional travel. The repeated portals between this world and ours have created a weak spot. If extreme energy needed somewhere to go, it would take the path of least resistance. I think he ended up being flung through the Speed Force. I guess we will know for sure if he has no radioactive signature like you would see from standard gate travel. Radiation doesn't travel fast enough to enter the Speed Force."

"Kid Flash can't go that fast on his own," protested Robin. "So he's stuck here like me?"

"I think the safety valve between our universes probably saved his life," offered Ironman who really didn't know but he occasionally liked to toss what he felt were comforting theories out there. It was better than when he was in the mood to toss out alarming theories. He was wondering what the heck this so called Speed Force was.

"Why were they running fast?" asked Robin. This was exactly the question Fury wanted answered unfortunately Superman felt he had best dumb his answer down to a five year old level.

"They were trying to save the world Robin."

"That's a very unsatisfying answer," protested Fury. How could running fast save the world? What was this Speed Force? What were they trying to save the world from? What was the nature of the threat? How fast did one have to run to get thrown out of your world? Was this Speed Force a threat? What was this weak spot between the worlds? Could anything repair this weak spot?

"Director, what do we need to do to satisfy you that we're friendly?" asked Robin interrupting Fury's train of thought.

"There are a few fundamental problems," spoke Fury. "There is a imbalance of power because we are not capable of generating a portal. At one time, we possessed a Tesseract device and at least two portals were generated by hostiles, to devastating effect here on this world and as I understand it on your world as well. The device is now guarded by the Asgard. Secondly, there is no open line of communication. There is no way to stop an unwelcome portal except to ..."

"Travel through it and shut it down at the source," interrupted Robin looking at Fury with unsettling blue eyes that seemed to see through him.

Captain America showed up right around then. There had been a lot of standing and staring at each other going on so the forty minutes had passed.

"Fury?" Captain America looked at Superman who hadn't put Robin down.

"Can we put the machine guns away now and sit down and talk like reasonable people?" asked Robin.

Director Fury was obviously listening to instructions on an earbud communicator. Superman and Thor who could hear what was being said clear as day, relaxed a little but waited politely for Director Fury to announce what was going on. The rest of the day was spend in negotiations with Shield, the Avengers, and Superman. Robin stayed for a little while.

"Director Fury, I think I'm going to start calling you Santa," Robin said as the Director poured himself a cup of coffee.

"So what has inspired this Spirit of Christmas," asked Fury wearily. It was almost impossible to get respect around here.

"Well, your name's Nick short for Nicholas just like Santa and Santa's kind of creepy. He sees you when your sleeping. He knows when your awake. He knows if you've been bad or good. And he breaks into your house at night."

"I hope this analogy gets better," spoke the Director passing the coffee pot along.

"... but he's good and somehow everyone knows that he's watching because he cares and he's trying to do good." Robin pulled at Director Fury's sleeve. "I know you're in an impossible situation here but so are we, so don't give up okay?" Robin encouraged.

"I don't think more name calling is going to help," answered the Director trying to be patient.

Robin nodded, "..sorry sir."

"Why don't you go check on your friend in the infirmary," suggested Fury. Fury staggered as he was given an attack hug. Several soldiers stationed around the room had jumped nervously then quickly put their guns back down.

"Thank you, Thank you!"

Hawkeye who was nearest the door dove to catch Robin before he excitedly ran right out the door.

"Whoa there. Just because you have permission to visit your friend doesn't mean the armed soldiers outside of this room know that." Hawkeye corrected.

"May I go with him?" Hawkeye asked Fury. Fury nodded.

"I really didn't have a good concept of how little he was until I saw him," commented Superman. "I haven't been involved in trying design a transport that could protect him through a gate but I did hear the radiation issues had been solved and I just had an idea. He'd be a little squashed and I'm not entirely sure the craft still works but it is worth a try."

"You have an idea for how to get him home?" asked Thor.

"What about his friend?" asked Ironman.

"Kid Flash is designed for acceleration and as I understand it, acceleration is the only outstanding problem."

"So what's your idea," asked Ironman. Fury didn't interrupt as this was important stuff.

Superman gave an odd little half smile. "Once there was a planet called Krypton far from earth. It was inhabited. The planet was dying. It was going to explode. A baby was placed in an escape pod and sent off. That escape pod crash landed on earth. The child survived unharmed."

"You want to try sending this escape pod through and you think he's small enough to fit. You know where the escape pod is and you can get your hands on it even though it's alien technology and one of a kind?" asked Stark sounding excited and a little astonished.

Superman nodded.

"If it was designed for an infant are you sure he's going to fit?" confirmed Tony.

"The trip from Krypton to Earth took a long time. The baby was a toddler by the time he crash landed," explained Superman. "The escape pod was designed to sustain him and had enough room to allow for some growth."

"How does a Kryptonian child compare to a human child in durability?" asked Thor.

"It is difficult to say," answered Superman thinking hard. I think until the pod opened and I was exposed to the radiation of the yellow sun I would have been just as vulnerable as any human child. "Batman has already started working on a crash test dummy."

A tentative plan to get everyone back where they belonged was a better answer than Fury had been hoping for. Nick knew the government wanted a direct line of communications. He knew they wanted full details of all dimensional tech. No government in their right mind would risk foreign relations, experimental and dangerous technology and more, over one child. The Avengers seemed to think he was stupid and couldn't see through a lot of their misdirection. This balancing act between the Avengers and the government was getting old.

"KF?" called Robin. "Dr. Banner how is he?" Kid Flash didn't look like a kid anymore. He looked like a grown up. He had an IV in each arm. His costume was folded neatly beside the bed and he was wearing a standard issue, dignity optional, hospital gown.

"He probably won't wake up for a while and he'll be sore but he's in pretty good shape. There was no radiation damage and only mild hypothermia."

"Then why's he unconscious and he wasn't under water. He's not wet so how can he have hypothermia?"

Bruce always uncomfortable explaining complex medical issues to Robin answered, "You don't have to get wet, to get hypothermia. It just has to be cold. Mostly he's tired and very battered."

"I'm pretty sure you have to get wet too. He needs food. I'm gonna get him food."

Hawkeye shrugged. "It'll keep him busy." Hawkeye followed Robin back and forth from the kitchen as Robin brought his friend an apple, a banana and a box of granola bars, then with Hawkeye's supervision, Robin started cooking pancakes; stacks and stacks of pancakes.

"You need to take the cape off if you're using the stove," insisted Hawkeye, who thought Robin was being ridiculous but figured keeping the kid out of the way was probably at least ten times more useful than listening to Old Nicky negotiate with caped flying guys who doubtlessly didn't give a tinkers toot what he had to say other than we're not going to blow up your planet or hurt the kid.

Hawkeye had heard all about Superman alright. The guy had more godlike abilities than Thor and he was smiling politely while Fury and the Shield crew waved guns around his favorite adopted nephew. Hawkeye knew a hero on his best behavior when he saw one.

Robin used the party trolley to deliver the pancakes to the infirmary.

"You realize that according to the serving size recommendations on the recipe that's enough food for 48 people," commented Hawkeye opening the door for Robin. Making pancakes had kept Robin busy for about three hours. Hawkeye went to talk to Bruce who looked really confused at the trolley of pancakes being delivered to his infirmary.

"No, munckin get down from there!" Hawkeye protested. Robin had climbed up on Kid Flash's bed. He appeared to be trying to pry the young man's eyes open.

"WAKE UP!" called Robin.

Bruce scooped Robin off the bed. "Come now, you know that's not a good way to treat someone who's hurt."

"PANCAKES!" yelled Robin.

"...dude you suck..."

"I made you pancakes. I'm awesome," corrected Robin wriggling out of Bruce's hold, grabbing a plate of pancakes and putting it on top of the injured hero who blearily opened his eyes.

"...ow.."

Robin started force feeding his friend.

"I don't think.." Bruce tried to correct.

"More," muttered the injured hero.

"You really shouldn't.." Bruce tried to explain.

"More, faster."

"I can't go any faster K.F. I'm kinda, err,.." The fork went flying as Robin tried to go too fast. Robin watched the fork fly off. "Ooop! Just a sec!" Robin in true five year old struggling with cutlery fashion, began picking up pancakes with his hand and shoving them at his friend. "Just don't bite my fingers Kid Mouth."

"I just woke up and you're already insulting me? You're just too cruel Rob."

"I'm feeding you pancakes, I suspect I could call you anything. Ow! No Biting!"

"I need something to drink to process this."

Robin ran to get a glass of water and a straw.

"Rob, dude. Even I can't eat that many pancakes. You know that right? When did you get home? How long have I been out? Pretty awesome to see you. Where's Flash? Usually he's here if I get hurt." K.F. paused talking to slurp down the water.

"Superman said you ran so fast, you ran right out of the universe. I wasn't going to make assumptions about how much food you'd need. I just made all the pancakes I had ingredients for." More eating happened for a while. Hawkeye, Dr. Banner and the Shield soldiers on guard by the door were looking a little disgusted, a little incredulous.

"So where's Flash?" asked K.F. confused.

"I didn't come home. You came to this world, only up in the Arctic somewhere. Superman came through the portal to help and he brought you here. This is Dr. Banner and Mr. Barton. They're my friends. Mr. Barton helped me make the pancakes."

"I love you Mr. Barton. You're a great guy. More pancakes."

The man didn't eat enough food for forty eight people but he did eat enough for ten.

"Can you walk to the washroom cuz I love you and all but I'm not doing bed pan duty when your body's in hyper-refuel mode," Robin said when Kid Flash finally stopped eating. The adults helped with the bathroom break returning the young man to his infirmary bed after.

Robin climbed back up onto the bed beside his friend.

"Come here," Kid Flash pulled Robin into a hug then passed out again with the small boy held tightly against his shoulder. Robin said nothing. He just stayed where he was being held. One of his small hands went up and traced the older hero's face as he slept.

Hawkeye left Dr. Banner with Robin and the patient, then took the trolley with the chaffing dish filled with the extra pancakes up to the conference room grabbing some paper plates and cutlery on his way.

Heroes, soldiers and ex-spy politicians ate pancakes.

"I need to get back as soon as possible. My world depends on me. With your permission I'd like to arrange a gate for tomorrow morning but I would like to spend a little time with Robin while I'm here," Superman explained standing.

Everyone was astonished when Shield withdrew. Fury took a few moments to talk with the Avengers privately. "If this gets messy you lot are the ones who would be cleaning it up anyway." Fury took a lolly pop out of his pocket and threw it at Tony Stark. "Have a Dum-Dum. Dum-dums are not really my thing. Superman is his uncle and the man in the infirmary is his best friend..." Fury deliberately turned off his communicator for a moment. "This isn't really a government affair is it? Try not to screw it up so badly that it becomes one."

Tony thought of the lolly pop box over the Tesseract transmitter. He fingered the candy. What did Fury know and who had he told. The radio signal sent through the transmitter was insecure. How long had Fury been listening. Why hadn't he just come and taken the little transmitter? Was Robin right? Was Patchy the Pirate, Santa? What had Fury meant when he said it wasn't a government affair? Tony stood there deep in thought for a little while: Uncle, father, brother, son, best friend. Oooh, they weren't dealing with a foreign government. Tony thought back to when they first turned the transmitter on, he could still hear Robin's voice in his head if he thought back. "Uncle Jon!..." They were dealing with Robin's family. The kid had one powerful family and Batman was all about the secrets. A government wouldn't ignore the death toll and risk gates and oh, sweet cinnamon pumpkin... Tony was glad Fury was on their side. He hoped at the end of the day when everything came to light Fury kept his job.

Tony went to his lab and looked at the Dum-Dum box right where he'd left it. He lifted off the box and the transmitter still had it's little blue glow that kept the portal open though the radio signal was still off. On the floor, by the portal detector was Robin's bear. Tony picked it up and went to join the others in the infirmary.

"You know I am suddenly very glad Batman generally stays out of politics," Superman was saying.

"I like Director Fury. He let the military get away with just enough throwing it's weight around to let them feel empowered then swept them away. He's all bark and no bite," insisted Robin cheerfully. "He's suspicious that I might be an enemy spy!" Robin bragged.

"He reminds you of Batman doesn't he," teased Superman.

Robin was so hyper, he was jumping on beds, climbing on chairs, running circles round the room, doing handstands and little flips, eventually Thor snatched him out of mid air. "Go burn off some of this energy in the gym."

"But K.F."

"Would likely be thankful for a little more decorum in his sick room," insisted Thor.

Robin excitedly dragged Superman out of the room chattering at him endlessly. The brightly clad hero looked extremely pleased to be dragged. He'd had a goofy grin plastered on his face since Shield left.

"Hey Rob!" called Tony. "I'm just going to give Batman a quick update."

Robin skidded to a stop and put his serious face back on. "Sorry Kal-El, I guess that's kind of important isn't it."

Batman's question and answer session went on for two hours before Superman said "Enough, I'll be back tomorrow you can grill me then."

Needless to say if Robin had only until morning to play with his Uncle he didn't intend to spend any of that time sleeping.

Some time around three in the morning Superman sat on the couch, pulled Robin onto his lap, Thor passed a blanket to wrap Robin in and Superman started telling old Kryptonian stories in a deep soft voice until Robin fell asleep on him.

"Do you want me to put him to bed?" asked Thor.

"No, I'll hold him." answered Superman softly. "I don't know if anyone has said this yet, but thank you."


	24. Home

_Because he was far from home._

Thor held Robin firmly because frankly he didn't trust what Robin would do with two hours of sleep watching his favorite Uncle disappear into a deadly tunnel of darkness with an explosive boom louder than a thunderclap. What he did was flinch like he'd been struck then start to hyperventilate.

The child's eye were unfocused staring where his Uncle used to be. Thor took the hearing protection off of Robin and called to him trying to get his attention. "Rob...an's...ay... Lis... lm...Robin..."

Robin knew Thor was talking to him. He was tumbling in the center ring with his dad. M'gann and Uncle J'onn's minds pulled at him, people were dying and a tunnel of darkness burned though him swallowing him whole in intense fire and pain. Typing at a terminal with numbers swirling in a whirl pool not sure what was real or dream only that everything he loved would end unless the tunnel stopped.

"Robin son, please breath with me slowly. Superman is well. The transfer will not hurt him. Robin calm down. Can you look at me please." Thor took Robin into the Tower. The Captain opened the door for them worriedly. Thor sat Robin on a chair in the lounge. He'd seen warriors with battle sickness. This looked a little bit like that. "Robin you need to calm your breathing." He'd expected the child to bolt after his uncle not to shut down in quite this fashion.

The Captain held a small cup of water with a straw in it. You don't go through an entire war without learning how to recognize and treat hyperventilation, and flashbacks. He knelt beside Thor, "Robin can you blow bubbles?" Robin didn't seem able to hear them.

Robin's vision grayed into a pinprick of light that exploded into vivid nightmares.

When Robin passed out. Thor huffed a little worriedly and carried him to the infirmary asking Jarvis to relay to Dr. Banner what was happening.

"Lay him on the bed and put a pillow under his feet," instructed Dr. Banner. Bruce pulled out a warmed blanket and tucked it around the child. "He should be alright in a little bit." It was only a few minutes before Robin's eyes fluttered open again. He looked disoriented and frightened. "Hello there Robin, can you pretend you are blowing out birthday candles for me."

Kid Flash who'd blearily woken when Thor burst in with Robin in his arms, watched concerned as Robin with too fast shuddering gasps tried to follow instructions. He limped out of his bed and took Robin's hand kneeling beside him. "Foooo...Blow on my nose. Just like that."

"I can Foo longer than you can Foo," challenged Kid Flash making a game of it. It took a little while but Kid Flash had the most success and soon Robin was breathing normally.

"I'm sorry," whispered Robin. "When the portal opened my brain vomited all the bad portal stuff at once."

"Rob, I've had eight years to pull myself back together from that mess. It's been hardly anytime at all for you. You look like you're working on almost no sleep and you got wigged out. Screw flashbacks you got Kid Flash back and I got your back."

Robin let slip a tiny smile. "That was Limburger cheesy, extra smelly, like stinky old socks cheesy," whispered Robin shyly.

"No way that was top notch American processed cheese product."

Kid Flash gave up and climbed up into the bed beside Robin because he was seriously uncomfortable kneeling beside the bed and the other side of the room was too far away. Robin had his hand in a death grip.

They started chatting about: "X-Box is old school... Soup can fly now 'bout ten percent of the time ... Good old Wall's gonna be inlaws with outlaws and Arsenal of the many names, whose cat is Cheshire and were you in the know of that being a Bat and all?"

"Totally got snaps to prove it KF."

"Are they speaking English or is this but random nonsense?" Thor asked Steve at one point.

Robin had calmed down enough that instead of a white knuckled grip, the point of contact had shifted to linked pinkie fingers and his eyes were at half mast. When Robin was snoring softly, Kid Flash shifted painfully and said, "He is going to be so freaking mollycoddled when he get's home, he's going to blow a gasket."

With his accelerated healing, Kid Flash was on his feet again in a few days. The Justice League sent through a radiation shielded version of his costume with instructions on how fast he had to be running when he entered the portal to connect well enough with the Speed Force to overcome the portal acceleration but Kid Flash said he'd go when Robin went, not before.

"Robin, the world doesn't need my speed to keep going. I'm planning on retiring anyway. See, over the last eight years, I learned that the world needed the genius chemist more than the half speed speedster. It took me a long time to wrap my head around the concept that the genius chemist was a pretty cool guy." Wally had no idea how the Boy Wonder was going to react to his proposed retirement. After he announced it to Robin, he was surprised to find his stomach flip flopping anxiously over what his friend would say.

Robin's cheeky monkey grin lit up his face. "You want babies."

Wally went red from his collar to his hairline but he really couldn't deny it.

"Bet that'll happen fast."

"Oh Shut Up! I hate bats sometimes! You little troll."

Still grinning Robin made kissy faces in KF's direction teasing relentlessly.

Wally turned away and put his hands over his ears yelling, "NAH, NAH, NAH, NAH, I'm not listening, creepy little troll!"

"Blonde hair and freckles, lots and lots of freckles!"

"Shut up!" Wally snorted back a chuckle. Robin just wanted him to be happy and his friend. What had he been worried about?

A week and a half later, a fully Tesseract Radiation shielded Kryptonian escape pod/space ship was sitting on the smokers patio. The crash test dummy inside was wearing a little domino mask. For two days Tony Stark and Bruce Banner disappeared into the workshop and no one heard anything from them. The do not disturb sign was up so Robin couldn't even talk to Batman or Red Robin.

Tony and Bruce finally came to dinner on the third day. Tony passed Robin the little black domino mask. "Want to go home tomorrow?" Everyone around the table fell completely silent.

Robin took the mask. He smiled and nodded. He looked up at Thor, he looked to each of them in turn, Auntie Tasha, Uncle Steve, Mr. Stark, Mr. Banner, Mr. Barton and Wally.

Natasha silently started to cry, "Sorry," she said turning away.

Robin crawled under the table, then climbed up into her lap and hugged her, which really didn't stop her crying.

There were a lot of people to say goodbye to.

Pippindorio wished him a joyful journey and told him to carry music in his heart his whole life through because like laughter and love, it is a beautiful thing to share.

Peter came by that night. "So no more, lets go play with the Rhinoman?" Peter still didn't know the whole truth.

Robin answered, "I've been a long way from home for too long. I live so far away I can't see your sun at night. I think you're an awesome hero and a really cool friend too."

Pepper was in California. She made Tony give Robin an envelope of photos to take with him. "Goodbye little love take care of yourself."

"Bye Miss Potts."

Robin didn't sleep much that night. Thor didn't sleep at all.

"So I have to wear the diaper even though I didn't eat breakfast?" Robin clarified with Dr. Banner.

"Astronauts have to wear diapers. Look it up," insisted Bruce.

Robin growled and stomped off to change into the stupid diaper. Glaring at Dr. Banner, he quite deliberately stuffed Bear into a diaper too. Bear was also wearing Robin's utility belt which had a web shooter and two cartridges in it's felt pocket.

"Okay the pants are going to be snug. I'll help you get them on. They'll inflate a little just before launch and stay inflated to keep blood flowing in your core and brain. Jet fighters wear them."

The pants took half an hour to get on.

Kid Flash slipped a pair of color matching bicycle shorts onto Bear.

Wires and tapes were attached to Robin next.

"Why?" demanded Robin. "The trip is minutes long at the most."

KF rolled his eyes. "Batman. He wants instant info. Those two pads are part of an emergency defibrillator just in case. That's monitoring your blood oxygen. That monitors your heart rate and that your blood pressure. This series of stickers are radiation dosimeters for different types of radiation. This monitors your body temperature."

Bruce looked a little uneasy at the amount of information Kid Flash related but Robin nodded and cooperated. KF attached strings to Bear with tape in all the same locations connecting them to a match box. "Did I do it right?"

"Okay, what's all that?" asked Robin looking a little worried.

"You going to be breathing a special liquid with oxygen in it. The fluid will support your lungs even at extremely high G-force. A tube will go down your throat and the liquid will be circulated." Dr. Banner explained tentatively.

Robin was looking a lot worried now. "I need all of that as well as the spaceship?"

"And I'm supposed to just run through in golden underpants?" asked Kid Flash.

"Every inch of you is covered. It's a full body suit not golden underpants," protested Dr. Banner to Kid Flash. "Your League are the ones that have any idea what this Speed Force is about."

"Robin, the crash test dummy showed survivable injury. We don't want you hurt at all. There is also a cervical support you're being strapped to. Here just put this vest on. This goes around your neck and your head is strapped like this. I'm just going to tighten this here and here."

Robin fell over onto the infirmary bed unable to adjust his balance when he couldn't move his core at all. "Bear doesn't want the vest!" He called out distressed.

Tony swore and left the room for a little bit. Natasha chased after him. "What's up?"

"The kid hasn't seen the tiny coffin space ship yet. Get Bruce and Thor out here for a minute."

Tony explained the plan had always been to sedate Robin. Crash test dummies approximate a lax passenger. The liquid ventilation worked better under sedation. There was no room to move at all in the space ship and Robin had had at least one panic attack with a portal. "It's time to say goodbyes, put him under and just finish the prep. All we're doing now is scaring him. Let him sleep and wake up home with his family with all the contraptions off."

When they returned to the room, the vest had been stripped off and Robin was on the other side of the room under Dr. Banner's desk.

Kid Flash was talking to him.

"He wants to talk to Batman," explained Kid Flash.

"But when I got here it was mostly radiation damage. I don't understand why I need all of this stuff!" Robin protested to Batman.

"The portals are completely different and you were supported in a time reversal field. Robin tell me do you have a single scar from your time spent fighting crime?"

"No."

"Every moment you were traveling, damage was being undone as fast as it was being done," Batman explained.

"Then why was there radiation damage?" Robin asked meekly.

"Tesseract radiation transcends space and time. Sort of," answered Mr. Stark. "We don't completely understand it."

"I really don't like the vest and liquid breathing sounds like drowning. How can you get the stuff out of me after. I thought lungs were like sponges not just bamoons? If I've breathed all the oxygen in the liquid and you can't get the liquid out won't I drown anyway?" Robin kept asking questions.

"Bamoons," teased Kid Flash trying to distract Robin.

"Ba-balloons.." corrected Robin not even registering the teasing.

"There is additional protection in the pod that couldn't be tested," spoke Batman at last.

"Why couldn't you test it?" asked Robin.

"Like with Miss Martian's ship, it reacts to a biological passenger.

A little while later Robin was climbing into Superman's ship to see what happened. "Close it then open it after a few moments," Robin insisted. Small spaces felt safe to him. The tight fit didn't bother him.

The interior of the spaceship began to mold around him and everything got really sleepy and calm. He snapped awake as the pod was opened.

Robin described the effect. Batman and Mr. Stark swore in tandem because who knows what would have happened if they'd sedated him before putting him in the pod and then he'd been sedated. So the cervical support vest was deemed unnecessary. They were still insisting on the liquid breathing system but they'd have to start it up with him awake.

Mr. Stark asked Jarvis to patch the Tesseract communication signal through the mission communicator units. He took an extra and discretely passed it to Director Fury who was waiting nearby.

Everything was behind schedule and they were depending on technology they didn't understand. Tony had started drumming on things at random.

Finally all that was left was to climb in and get the breathing apparatus hooked up.

Wally was wearing his gold spacesuit except for the helmet.

"Bye bye Fadir Thor." Robin jumped at the tall blond god and hugged him with everything he had

Thor kissed him on the head and muttered in Old Norse a little.

Everyone got hugs. Auntie Tasha got a kiss too.

"Player," teased Clint. Natasha elbowed him in the ribs. Clint Barton insisted on his hug just like everyone else.

"Mr. Stark you know I wouldn't be going home without your help. It's not the suit that makes you a hero."

"Shut up and go home kid," choked Tony.

Steve quite honestly forgot about Thor's hearing when he picked up Robin, hugged him and whispered, "Goodbye Richard Grayson."

Thor didn't notice. He was busy slipping a small charm shaped like his hammer into Bear's felt pocket.

By then Robin was in tears. Natasha passed him some tissues.

"You lot are horribly sappy," snapped Furry.

The last thing Robin said was, "I love you guys. Thank you."

Robin put on his domino mask. He climbed into the pod. The monitoring equipment was turned on. He tried to relax as tube was forced down his throat, an odd breathing mask was strapped against him. It all felt like choking. Robin squeezed Bear's hand and tried to keep his body relaxed.

Dr. Banner kept calmly explaining what he was doing.

Kid Flash came and gently restrained him when the liquid was turned on. His whole body jerked involuntarily, trying to reject it.

Robin lay shaking trying to stay calm. Finally Dr. Banner put some weird hearing protection right in his ears. It felt like wiggly worms slithering in.

Then, the pod closed and everything was calm... and comfortable... This was niiiiicce. With eyes at half mast, breathing in the waters... as if in a warm mechanical womb, Robin listened sleepily, feeling rather like he was floating. Two people were speaking Kryptonian. Robin recognized the language but didn't know what the voices were saying.

"I'd be freaking out in there," commented Clint. "That's got to be the single most disturbing thing I've seen in a long time." Thinking of little Robin twitching and jerking as he tried to tolerate the liquid breathing, then watching as the windowless lid was shut trapping him inside.

Kid Flash put on the helmet. Tony checked it's seals. Steve and Thor put the pod in it's final position. Kid Flash went to his start position watching the drag racing lights that were to signal his start.

"Portal opening in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!"

"I didn't even see Kid Flash move, did he go? Is he gone?" asked the soldier stationed at the lights.

"Shut Up!" ordered Fury.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"Both travelers received," Cyborg reported.

"Whew! That's a wild ride," announced Kid Flash.

"I'm getting him out. Let's him on the gurney. Robin can you give me a thumbs up? Atta boy. Leslie get this off of him! All of it."

"Get out of the way you blustery bat!"

"I just want to hear his voice," whispered Thor listening, closing his eyes and turning out all of the background noise and shouting.

"*(^&$*% *^*"

"&^% #"

It was all just noise, wait... that high short coughing.

"...Batman."

 **finis**


	25. Appendix:Bruce and Alfred

_**APPENDIX: BRUCE AND ALFRED**_

 _This is not a part of the proper story. If you were wondering what is was like for Robin when he finally got home these Appendices are windows into Richard's world._

Batman was finally allowed to go to Robin. Doc Leslie nodded for him.

He's so tiny. Thought Bruce dismayed. Robin sat swaying slightly on the emergency gurney, his eyes unfocused, clouded and sleepy. Leslie was holding onto him with one arm so he wouldn't topple over.

"Batman, he has strong narcotics in him so we could set his arm and there is fluid that still has to drain from his inner ears so his balance is comprised. He is a little unsteady but he is going to be fine," Doc Leslie explained.

Batman swept forward and swept Richard into his arms, wrapping his cape around his tiny Robin.

Dick made a soft murmur of comfort and hugged him with his one good arm. "Batman."

"Let's get you home chum."

"I'll phone Gotham General and get an appointment at the fracture clinic for his arm. Just leave the splint on until then," added Leslie.

"Wheresss Bear?" slurred Robin.

"Red Robin has him," reassured Batman.

Robin put his head down on Batman's shoulder and closed his eyes.

Batman, Robin and Red Robin disappeared into the Zeta Beam.

Flash turned to Kid Flash and grinned. "Tell me that wasn't the absolute best thing you've seen all year. Batman smiled when he put his head down you know. Mark it on your calendar. You won't see that again."

"I don't care how old Rob is. It feels like I regrew a missing limb or something. I'm pretty sure it'll be a few weeks before I can peal this goofy grin off my face," answered Kid Flash.

The Flashes took the Zeta back to Star City, then zipped over to Barry's and changed.

Artemis was waiting. She literally leaped into Wally's arms. "For a little while we thought you were dead, then Batman started barking orders. Superman and your Uncle pretty much disappeared without taking a moment to explain anything to anyone and finally, finally that infuriating Bat decides to tell us what was going on."

"Yeah, I had a little friend looking out for me," smirked Wally.

"Don't do that to me again!" scolded Artemis.

Wally didn't feel like a scolding session so instead of replying to Artemis, he kissed her.

Cyborg grumbled as he disassembled the custom boom tube and crated it up. He was looking forward to not being interrogated several times a day by random heroes about the Robin retrieval project. He'd never in his life had so many people hovering over him about something. The capital expenditure on this project had to have been massive. The real estate purchase for this property alone had to have cost over a million. Nobody seemed to be keeping track of any of it. Oh do you need this extremely rare doo-dah from the other side of the galaxy. Sure... Here you go! Happy to help!

If they ended up having a party over this and I know they will, thought Cyborg, I expect a big fat slice of cake. That's all I ask; cake.

Leslie was sorting out the medical equipment. They had literally been prepared for anything. There was even a portable Atlantian hyperbaric oxygen chamber in case the extended extreme acceleration pressure caused a form of decompression illness. Leslie was used to dealing with Batman. She had even dealt with Superman from time to time. The equipment training session with Aquaman had been surreal and Cyborg just made her uncomfortable.

It turned out the only injury was some inner ear damage that looked like it would get better in time and a broken wrist. Someone should have taken the watch off of him before they sent him through. I should arrange for hearing tests at the end of the month thought Leslie.

Batman put his groggy little Robin down on the gurney in the Batcave. "Just lie down while Tim and I get changed." Batman gently removed Robin's mask and took off his own cowl. "Hello, Dick," he said with a smile.

"Hi Brucssss..." Richard smiled reaching out to a point six inches to the side of where Bruce was actually standing and looking perplexed that his hand met only air.

Bruce and Tim went to get changed and Alfred came down the steps holding a tray of cookies and cocoa. Richard's eyes lit with joy and he stood on the portable gurney trying to climb over the side to get to Alfred. There was a tremendous crash. Alfred put the tray on the floor and ran to see what had happened. There was Dick trapped and tangled under the gurney looking very confused from in between the bars, bed and spinning wheels.

"Alfred it fell down."

"My word Master Richard are you alright?"

Bruce and Tim half dressed came running to see what had happened.

Tim had been in the shower. Wearing nothing but a towel and his hastily grabbed glasses he started laughing. It wasn't that funny but his body didn't have anything else to do with the sudden rush of adrenaline. "You alright little bro?"

Bruce in his boxer shorts knelt down to look at Dickie. "How'd you manage that?" He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw his very little boy had no new injuries. He was just kind of tangled under the gurney. There didn't seem any point in getting upset with him. Dick's expression was so completely befuddled, it was clear he couldn't have told you what direction left was even if you put a big L on his hand.

"I wann'd .. go to Alfed. When I stood and tried to cim,.. climb doown. Evy thing down... hugs him," Dick slurred.

"He'd have come to you for a hug you know Chum," Bruce corrected gently. "Tim, help me lift this off of him."

Dick crawled out, stood up and staggered over to Alfred, hugging him. Alfred was getting older but Dick didn't weigh much. Alfred picked him up. "Master Bruce I think I will take him up to bed. Would you care for some cookies Master Richard. In my experience young boys are often fond of cookies."

"No thank you. Tummy's dizzy too," Dick held onto Alfred and closed his eyes. Alfred took the lift up.

When Bruce came up to check on his little bird he looked in the bedroom. Dick wasn't there. The quilt was missing off the bed. Looking at the way the freshly vacuumed carpet pile lay, Bruce opened the door to the walk-in closet. There was Dick snuggled in the quilt hiding in the closet fast asleep. Bruce sat down, in the closet, (What was Dickie doing in the closet?) and watched his son sleep.

Bruce had not exactly gotten massive amounts of sleep over the last two months. When he closed his eyes even just for a moment, inter-dimensional mathematics blurred before his eyes. It wasn't long before he was slumped down beside Dick snoring.

Four hours later Dick lashed out in his sleep and whacked Bruce in the nose with the hard plastic splint on his broken arm.

"Ow," whimpered Dick holding his arm and sitting himself up.

"Ditto," answered Bruce rubbing his nose painfully and also sitting up. "Uh, so the closet?"

Dick looked down and away. "The Flying Graysons poster was looking at me. There was a lot of other stuff there too,..it was like having the ghost of me, looking at me. I'm not that me but I am but I'm not and well... Could you sleep staring at something like that?" Dick looked back at Bruce his eyes unsettled.

Bruce gave Richard a one armed hug. "We'll redecorate."

When Dick ran off to beg cookies off of Alfred, Bruce went to his study to actually get some work done. He felt light, four hours asleep on the floor of his son's closet, it was the best sleep he'd had in years.

"RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON!" Alfred bellowed.

Oh dear, what now? Bruce came and saw Dick sprawled out at the bottom of the banister, the large vase holding the umbrellas had skittered off into the corner and shattered when it hit the wall, umbrellas were everywhere and Dick was giggling. He grabbed an umbrella and ran back to the top of the stairs!

"AGAIN!" Dick grinned and swooped down with the umbrella open. He flipped off the end of the banister but because his balance was messed up he couldn't land the flip and went sprawling again, the umbrella bounced off across the room. Dick was laughing delightedly.

Bruce swept him off his feet before he could mount the banister for a third go.

"How many cookies did you eat?' demanded Bruce!

Still giggling uncontrollably Dick answered. "All of them. I didn't have breakfast or lunch and it's almost dinner. I was STARVING!"

Dick wiggled and squirmed until he was put down, then raced off to head outside.

"Richard!" called Bruce.

Dick didn't even slow down. "I gotta check the best climbing trees! I'm sure they got super big!"

"With a broken arm? Dick SHOES! YOU NEED SHOES!"

"Master Richard! That is quite enough. Stop where you are young man!" Alfred scolded.

Dick flipped down the front steps and ran off singing about Space Cat Jack at the top of his lungs.

"I'm sure he used to be better behaved than this," commented Bruce who pushed back his sleeves with a determined look on his face, slipped on his shoes and went to show his wayward son who was boss.

Alfred went back to the kitchen to get the broom, saw the plate of cookies and started chuckling. All of the cookies indeed. This was classic Richard.

Bruce hauled Dick back into the house scolding him and threatening punishments.

"Master Bruce?" called Alfred watching Richard critically. Mr. Wayne didn't learn all of his detective skills far from home.

Bruce looked up at his loyal butler. Bruce was scowling something fierce. Dick was crying, while straining and twisting to keep looking Bruce in the face which was not normal body language when he was upset. Dick looked terribly confused.

Alfred walked over to Dick and knelt in front of him so that Dick was looking at him.

"My boy, can you hear me right now or have you been reading lips?"

Richard just kind of curled into himself. "I figured the ringing would stop evenaly."

"Eventually," corrected Alfred. "Master Bruce and I thought you weren't listening. You know better than to slide down the banister and we were both yelling for you."

"You were yelling? It can't be against the rules. I remember doing it before. I'm sure I do. I'm sorry about the vase holding the umbrellas. I didn't notice it got broke."

"Young Master your memories are imperfect?" cued Alfred.

Dick nodded, his shoulders still hunched in on himself.

"It is against the rules. The chandelier is off limits too." Alfred pointed and shook his head sternly to be sure Richard knew what he was talking about.

"ok,... why's Bruce so mad about the cookies?"

"Well, I think he forgot about your excellent arithmetic skills. He assumed with how disobedient you seemed to be acting that you had eaten everything I baked; not, one fourth of the cookies on the plate, all that you deemed your share."

"...was three too many?"

"Oh Chum. I'm sorry."

Alfred noticed that Richard's eyes hadn't left his face. Bruce watching Richard saw the little guy hadn't even noticed he'd spoken and squatted in front of him trying again.

"Richard, this," Bruce ran his fingers through Dick's hair stopping at his ears. "This is something we needed to know about."

Dick shrugged. "Doctor Leslie checked me out. Didn't you know already?"

Bruce blinked. Five years old with extra thrown in he reminded himself. "Chum, doctors don't have super powers. Did you tell her you couldn't hear?"

Dick shrugged again looking very defensive. "She said something about my ears. There was a lot going on. I'm not sure what anybody said."

"Master Bruce, Doctor Leslie called. The appointment for the fracture clinic is set for tomorrow at three." Alfred was gently examining Richard's arm. "It's quite swollen. I think it would be best to ice it and get you into a sling to elevate it or the arm will be too swollen to cast tomorrow. Master Richard I must insist you treat yourself much more gently. It would be most unfortunate to have to reset the bones again."

Alfred got the first aid kit out of the kitchen. He rigged a sling and lay an ice pack in the sling over top off the arm and discretely swiped away the last of the errant tears. "I'll prepare a late lunch for you gentlemen. Master Timothy has already eaten."

Bruce wanted to chase the kicked puppy look off of Dick's face but all Bruce could think about was the potential hearing loss. He wanted to call Leslie. He was pleasantly surprised that though Dick had literally been in tears half an hour ago, all seemed to be forgiven and he was joking and smiling through lunch.

When Dick ran off to find Bear and take him for a tour of the house after lunch, Alfred came up behind Bruce who looked a little befuddled and said, "Master Bruce, you do realize that a young child will be easily set to tears. It need not alarm you. It will be a few years yet before his brain development matures enough that a good scolding or slight upset won't overwhelm him."

"Of course Alfred," answered Bruce who was watching Dick out of the corner of his eye. "I think he's inspecting the house to be sure he's home," observed Bruce.

Dick was counting the squares of tiles between rooms, checking out which way doors opened, looking in things and reading the titles of books on shelves. Every short while Dick would look back to be sure Alfred or Bruce was still nearby.

Bruce had taken the day off. He wanted time to just be with his son after so many years without him. They didn't have to talk or have any great adventure. Bruce revelled in those tiny odd little mannerisms that were uniquely Dick. A tilt of a head here, a characteristic little smile, the way he'd often swing around a door frame.

Tim had gone to the mountain to give them some time alone.

Father and son went for a walk around the property although, Richard didn't walk anywhere. He skipped, hopped and leaped along, happily chatting with Bruce although it was a very one sided conversation as Richard was a little too hyper to pause, watch and read lips. Bruce smiled and trailed along. By four in the afternoon his little boy was looking pretty sleepy and doing head bobs but his internal clock said it was nine at night so that was to be expected.

Bruce pulled Dick over to a log to sit down with him making sure he was looking. "Dick we've got to start getting used to the new name and identity. At the fracture clinic you'll be in the public eye. We can't have mistakes."

"I been thinking about that. Dad was always Dad. I'm gonna call you Daddy," Dick smiled up at Bruce.

"I have been thinking about that," corrected Bruce.

"Gahh! You're horbible sometimes!" Dick exclaimed in disbelief.

"Horrible," corrected Bruce with a smirk.

"That's what I said, horbible," Dick explained earnestly.

Bruce narrowed his eyes not sure if Dick was teasing him right back or he just couldn't tell the difference because he couldn't hear it. He ruffled Dick's hair.

"I called Leslie. The liquid trapped in your inner ears is the perfluorocarbon from the liquid breathing apparatus. It is quite a bit more dense then water, the viscosity was always a challenge but it does evaporate so there is a high probability that the fluid in your ears is the causal factor behind the hearing

loss and..."

"STOP," interrupted Dick scolding Bruce firmly. "So you said, I called Leslie blah, blah, blah. I can read lips but I can't read lips when you're speaking gibberish."

Bruce smirked a little and tried again. "Your hearing should get better soon."

"Much better," complimented Dick.

"Barbara is going to take you to the hospital to get your cast. The appointment is tomorrow. It will keep you out of the media a little longer. You will be meeting her dad who just found out about you so things might be a little strained."

"Do I call her mommy or were we saying I call her Barbara because she is supposed to be my secret mommy? I don't think things will be strange. Captain Gordon is nice."

Bruce resisted the urge to correct the lip reading errors. It was a nuanced skill and it was a little incredible that Dick had retained it as well as he had. "Call her mommy and it's Police Commissioner Gordon now," Bruce said simply though he was thinking if I were to die and she ever had to fight CPS for you, it would need to be clear, you thought of her as your mother. "Do you remember sign language?"

Dick shrugged. "Only kinda, sorta, but really, not so much."

"That is not proper English, Damian."

Damian/Dick scrunched his nose at him. "No I do not sir, daddy sir." The protest was ruined a little by an enormous yawn. "What's a please missioner?"

Bruce's heart hurt for his chum. "Can you still finger spell in ASL?" After receiving a sleepy nod, Bruce signed, "P.O.L.I.C.E. C.O.M.M.I.S.S.I.O.N.E.R."

Damian tried to lie down on the grass and close his eyes.

"Chum, I know 5 hours is a big time change but you need to stay awake at least until dinner."

"I'm not hungry and I didn't really sleep last night. I was practicing the tiny vio(YAWN)olin. Pipindorio and I worked on a special song to share with yoo(YAWN)ou." Damien head bobbed again.

"A tiny violin?" Bruce asked, Damian walking back to the manor but his little chum was too sleepy for more lip reading.

Dinner was quiet. Tim was back. Damian ate two carrots then fell asleep on his hamburger. Alfred shook him awake gently. "Grandpa I want to sleep," protested Damian in a whine.

Alfred looked a little startled to be called grandpa though he'd long thought of Richard as his grandson.

"Is six o'clock too early to send him to bed?" asked Tim. "I know the hamburger buns are soft and fresh and all, but he's beyond done."

"He had a four hour nap," protested Bruce. "If we let him go to bed now he'll be up in the middle of the night wanting to play."

Damian fell asleep again and almost toppled out of his chair. Bruce caught him. "I think sleep is winning."

Bruce pulled Damian into his lap and let him eat dinner there. He ate a little.

Bruce with Richard/Damian in his lap found himself breathing the familiar scent from the head full of hair under his nose instead of remembering to eat. He was holding Richard so he didn't fall,... not hugging him.

Tim kept looking at them, his eyes smiling but his expression otherwise carefully neutral.

Damian didn't quite sleep the night through. He woke up about an hour before the end of patrol. Helped Alfred get a snack ready for the returning heroes and still in PJ's took Bear down to the Batcave to wait for their return. He pulled up some cartoons on a small display of the Bat computer and sat in Bruce's big chair waiting. He could see the cowl camera on one of the other displays. Damien started programming an interface between the cowl camera and facial recognition software combined with criminal databases like Ironman and Shield had had. It was slow going with one hand. He muttered to Bear in Romani about what he was trying to do, explaining that once he got the basic software designed he'd add an option to scan social media databases for facial recognition too. When he heard the Batmobile returning, he saved his work and shut it down for now.

Batman was pounced on with a big hug on his return then Red Robin was shyly hugged as well.

"What are you doing out of bed?" growled Batman.

Alfred who'd been cleaning the cave while keeping an eye on things and knew what Robin had been up to said nothing.

"Grandpa and I made you peanut butter cookies."

Alfred wondered why he was suddenly Grandpa and no longer Alfred or Alfie.

Robin seemed to notice his slightly bemused look for he turned to him with a tilt of his head, "Captain America asked me who you were. I guess after everything that's happened I'm just tired of not being sure whether the people around me know what they mean to me. Red actually asked if it would have bothered me if I'd been adopted. What a stupid question."

Red laughed delighted. At five years old Robin was not very good at emotionally constipated mystery. He was exceedingly straight forward. It was refreshing. Batman looked liked he'd swallowed a frog and he was trying to smile around it.

Batman removed the cowl and knelt in front of Robin. "Chum you always said you didn't want me to replace your father."

Robin shrugged, "I'm a kid. Just because I want to eat ice cream every day doesn't mean it should happen."

"Maybe it's Thor's influence because he prefers to simplify complicated problems. When you first met me I was eight. When you last saw me I was twelve. Right now I'm five. The simple problem is I'm not ready to be without a father. I never have been yet. The simple solution is you seem to be volunteering for the job. Anything else is just confusing," spoke Robin who didn't look the least bit confused, in fact it looked like he finally understood something that had been confusing him for a long time.

"Thor never liked me much," answered Bruce. "I wish I'd met him years ago."


	26. Appendix II: Barb and Jim Gordon

**Appendix II: Barb and Jim Gordon**

Barbara Gordon had been leaving clues for her father since Superman managed to travel the boom tube and actually see Robin or Dick well actually she needed to get used to calling him Damian. The thought that she was going to be Damian's mom made her uneasy because at his new age he'd need a mom figure but how would the transition from friend to mom work. The thought of Dick being dragged around by CPS again if anything happened to Batman made her push the awkwardness away and do what needed to be done.

Attempt 1: Had her dad actually bought the stupid lie that the half laundry basket of size 4T kids clothes had been picked up at the laundromat by mistake? She had her own washer dryer. It was supposed to be a transparent lie.

Attempt 2: She left a ball, a broken crayon and a toy car under her coffee table. Her dad acted like he didn't notice. Maybe he thought she'd been babysitting? Think! How do I start this conversation?

Attempt 3: She left the "What to Expect from Kindergarten, A Mom's Guide," website up on her computer and changed it so the screen saver wouldn't come on for an extra 15 minutes and then sent her Dad into her office to fetch her purse for her. He made no comment what so ever. She opened the computer to check that the website was still there. BLASTED POPUPS!

Attempt 4: She stocked the cupboard with her dad's favourite coffee mug in it, with a dinosaur sippy cup and kids multivitamins. ...nothing. Okay her dad was part of the coffee zombie army, when he needed coffee the blinders were on, that idea had probably been a lost cause from the get go.

Attempt 5: Every wall plug in her house got childproofed. Her dad commented that he'd installed the child safety plugs too! They stop about 10 percent of heat loss do to uncontrolled airflow you know.

Attempt 6: A kiddy step stool was tucked in the bathroom cupboard next to the spare toilet paper and she made sure the roll was almost empty when her dad was coming over. He assumed the step stool was to help her with bowel moments.

"Yeah Barbie, I saw the unicorn poop infomercial for the squatty potty. It was in really poor taste. Does it help though, propping your feet up?" He asked curious.

With a defeated air Barb tried using the stool to prop her feet up the next time she was scheduled to go number two. It did help, blast it all! Stupid unicorn!

Attempt 7: Come on lucky 7. She 'let' a precious photo of Damian fall out of her wallet. It wasn't one of the originals sent from another world. They were under lock and key in the bat vault. Thankfully her dad picked up the photo staring at it curiously. Barbara went beat red as she reached for the photo.

"Barbara? Where'd you get a photo of Richard Grayson when he was little?"

Uh wait a minute, she thought that wasn't what you were supposed to ask. "That's, D.. Damian. He's m.. s..son."

"Pardon?" asked Jim confused looking up at Barbara. She looked like she'd just swallowed a codfish.

"Well, you see dad. I've been meaning to talk to you about this. Damian is m..mine."

"Funny," answered Jim dryly.

"No, not really."

Silence...

"Daddy? Say something."

"Aren't you a little old for April fools?"

Barbara looked at the calendar. ...stupid, stupid, stupid, seriously? I've been trying to do this for how long and the dialog starts today of all days? Urgh... jokes on me she thought. It felt like her insides were twisting into a pretzel. "It's after lunch dad," she protested.

She wanted this emotional bombshell off her plate. She wanted to protect her Dad from the world of super villains and craziness that was, Batman, Batgirl, Robin and now Oracle. She was positive her dad had most of the Gotham vigilante game figured out. Please she thought, know the truth through the lies of plausible deniability I'm feeding you. ...but also it's no joke.

"Remember back when I was first in the chair and I gained a bunch of weight? Born March 4th, four years ago. He's Bruce Wayne's too. He is raising him." This sounded easier when Batman was explaining his plan thought Barb grimacing.

Jim's eyebrows raised alarmingly. What? That man's son had been in Barb's classes in high school.

Barb saw the look in her dad's eyes and started panicking. She waved her hands in frantic denial. "I'm Dami's surrogate mum. I did not... you know! Decade rule! I am not some kind of cougar. It was a doctor's office thing. Dick's mum had eggs frozen. It was this crazy idea to connect a little with Dick, to honour his memory while getting to be a mom or dad depending on which one of us you mean. I got to be a Mom but the wheelchair and everything that comes with it wasn't an obstacle." Barbara started off babbling embarrassed and ended up in tears.

She hadn't meant to burst into tears but there were real emotions mixed up in the stupid story. She remembered Dicks funeral. Feeling absolutely bereft. She'd just found out about the Robin thing and he was her best friend and they did some truly awesome stuff then he was gone. He'd been invincible and then he was gone, not 'vinced' just gone and then the Joker thing a few years later. She'd spent more than a year in diapers before she figured out toileting as a paraplegic. She'd been distraught, heavy on the dis as Robin used to say. There had been a lot of tears and misplaced anger and not so spectacular choices.

Jim looked at Barbara who never cried. She was the original strong independent woman, so held her. "Barbie it never occurred to you that all this craziness. I am always here for you. We can be a we. We've always been a we before."

"I had to sign a heavy duty nondisclosure agreement but it expires really soon."

"You've been dropping hints? You wanted me to know before anyone else?"

Barbara nodded. "You can't tell anyone. Not until Mr. Wayne registers him for kindergarten. It's to protect Damian. Bruce has always had a lot of trouble with paparazzi and kidnappers."

"Tell me about Damian, Barb."

Barbara nodded and thought. What would be sure to be the same? "He is always in motion. He likes gymnastics like me. He is very smart, scary smart. He has been begging Bruce to get him a pet." Barbara thought back to when Dick was 8 for inspiration. "Preferably a pet elephant but I think he could be persuaded to compromise with something more realistic."

"He has blue eyes. He's a mischievous little guy sometimes. He likes his apples cut in half so you can see the star inside then he'll nibble around the star." Dick did that from the time he was eight until he disappeared through that killer dimensional portal, presumed dead due to massive radiation exposure.

"What were the terms of the non-disclosure agreement?"

"To simplify it, I'd lose all parental rights. There were also financial penalties too but they are slap on the wrist type stuff. $10 G a year until Dami's 16th Birthday."

"Your calling $10 G a year a slap on the wrist?" sputtered Jim.

"It's Bruce Wayne," answered Barbara.

Jim felt like he went through the next few days in a haze. People would be talking to him, he would stare off into space. He pulled up the Wayne kidnapping files. Okay, maybe Mr. Wayne had a right to paranoia. Would Barb have had contractions? Did she have a c-section? Were there baby pictures. How did he not notice. He was not getting a lot of work done.

Barb answered a few of his dazed questions. "Contractions are triggered by hormones so it not that different except they use forceps. We have a few baby pictures but not many because Bruce is super paranoid. I didn't want you to know so I did everything I could to hide it. He was a small baby dad and he came early. I didn't gain near as much weight as I should have. I was terrified someone would find out and I wouldn't get to be his mom."

"Would Mr. Wayne have held you to the contact if someone had accidentally found out?" asked Jim incredulous. He want to go all investigative detective but well penalty clause, not worth it. Barb would never forgive him.

"I don't know. I was hormonal and not thinking right," answered Barb. Batman had prepared pictures of the first three years into a special album. Barb wasn't sure how he'd done it but it had to be easier than some of the other crazy stuff he had pulled off. CGI? Martians? Who knew.

"I looked into it. Registration for kindergarten has been open since February. What is he waiting for?" asked Jim who wanted to meet this grandson. That was an odd thought. He had a grandson.

Bruce wasted no time. He had Tim drop off the kindergarten registration forms the day after Dick got back.

Tim had the school date stamp the documents then he snapped a photo with his phone and emailed it to Bruce and Barb then sent a signal to Clark Kent that the press release was good to go. Clark replied that he was holding the press release until Bruce had a few stock photos prepped. Okay, thought Tim, I suppose that makes sense.

The primary division of Gotham Academy was just down the street a little from the senior school. Tim looked in the kindergarten pen for a bit before heading back to the high school. Damian was a little smaller than most of the kids but these guys were a year ahead so that made sense too.

Conner, Miss Martian, and Kaldur had wanted to interrogate Tim about Robin yesterday at the cave but he really hadn't had much to say except that he was home safe. Robin got home then had passed out due to medication.

He didn't want to tell them that the manor had transformed the moment first contact had been made. It went from mission control with sleeping quarters upstairs to a home with a Batcave in the basement. From the first day Robin's voice had echoed over the transmitter. Bruce wasn't Batman in disguise. Batman was Bruce in disguise.

Tim had gotten a tiny glimpse of the true Robin last night when a little boy in a big bat chair rearranged the family from servant, master of the house, adopted son and ward, to Grandpa, Daddy, Big Brother Timmy and me, complete with welcome home hugs and cookies. How Bruce had ever let him out at night? Tim was sure he'd never understand it.

Jim pulled up to the gate at Wayne Manor with Barbara in the passenger seat and pushed the intercom. He'd brought a police cruiser. Every 4 year-old boy liked police cruisers right?

The appointment wasn't until 3 pm but Jim had taken the afternoon off. He helped Barbara into her wheelchair. It was just after 1 pm. There was no need to knock on the door Alfred was waiting for them.

"Where is he?" asked Barb.

"Young Master Damian is upstairs trying to convince Bear that the dumb waiter is a miniature elevator. Bear has been sending me messages for the past hour." Alfred passed Barbara the messages.

In childlike scrawl, written in half a dozen different languages, were page after page of knock knock jokes.

"GRANDPA! GRANDPA! GRANDPA!" a terrified young voice yelled down. Tiny feet could be heard racing through the upstairs halls then Damian came leaping down the stairs flipping down the steps and skidding across the landing into a frantic heap before leaping up again. "THE TINY ELEVATOR ATE BEAR!"

"Young Master Damian I believe I explained to you that the dumb waiter jams very regularly. That was one of the primary reasons I did not wish you to use it as an elevator even if you may have fit."

"Well, I suppose I'll have to climb down the elevator shaft and rescue Bear!" decreed Damian intensely. "I have to rescue him!" Damian raced off back up the stairs before Alfred could stop him.

Commissioner Gordon and Barbara yelled after him.

Alfred who knew he'd have no hope of moving at Robin speed, which was undoubtedly what Damian thought the situation called for, thinking quickly flicked the lights in the grand hall off and on several times in quick succession. Thankfully Damian stopped and looked back.

"Your pardon," Alfred explained calling back as he headed up the stairs. "Damian's been having problems with his ears again. We've just discovered it has degenerated to the point where he simply cannot hear. The lights were the surest way to draw his attention."

"You didn't tell me he'd been having problems with his ears," Jim protested.

"I hoped he was past that," protested Barb bluffing. Barb wheeled herself into the kitchen looking for the dumbwaiter there and trying the button a few times. "Dad can you go upstairs and help on that end?"

Alfred was knelt in front of Damian a hand on each of his shoulders earnestly explaining that it would not be safe to climb down the dumbwaiter shaft. "Look at me Damian! I'm talking to you!"

"But I have to rescue Bear!" explained Damian desperately trying to wriggle away.

"You are not risking your life over an inanimate object!"

"He's not an anime subject! He's Bear! I'm sure it would be easier to climb over him then to climb up from underneath but I can try it your way but I have to go he's been trapped in there for so long now."

Damian wriggled out of Alfred's grasp and bolted away intent on climbing into the dumbwaiter shaft only to be caught and picked up by Jim Gordan. Damian froze in surprise.

Alfred came over and turned Damian's face to him. "Master Damian, I will rescue Bear. Go downstairs and wait with your mother."

Damian seemed a little calmer so Jim took him downstairs and plunked him in Barb's lap. Damian curled into her shaking a little. Bear was important.

"Hi," whispered Damian unhappily.

Barbara put her arms around him and hugged him. She really wasn't sure what was going on or why Dick would be so upset about a stuffed animal but he was upset and he was small and warm and familiar.

"How is your arm?"

"I probably shouldn't have tried that flip down the steps. I think I banged it a bit. It hurts."

"Oh dear Dami, I can see it will need re-setting. No flips. No cartwheels. No jumping on the furniture. None of that until this heals."

"Okay," answered Damian quietly. Damian stared at Barbara getting caught up examining her rather than worrying about Bear slowly he relaxed. He looked at the changes the years had wrought. All at once he smiled and gave her a pleased hug accompanied by a shift to his cheeky monkey grin. "I've got the prettiest mommy ever!" He kissed her on the cheek then scrambled off her lap and hid under the kitchen table giggling.

Barb laughed delighted.

Bear was rescued.

Grandpa Jim was reintroduced.

"Face him and make sure he's looking at you when you are speaking to him. He is too clever for his own good. He has taught himself to read lips which made it difficult to determine quite how severe his hearing problems have gotten. Doctor Leslie has prescribed decongestants for now. If the problems fail to resolve themselves further action will be taken shortly," Alfred explained.

Barbara wanted to know what decongestant he was taking in case he had to be sedated to reset the arm. Alfred had everything written down including a birth certificate card for identification and an medical insurance card.

"Miss Gordon please mind him in traffic downtown. He is not accustom to such complete deafness."

"You can call me Papa Jim," Jim was explaining. He was sat under the table with Damian who had yet to come out. "I'm your mom's dad. That makes me your Grandfather or papa." Damian was grinning at him as if terribly amused by something.

"Daddy said you're the police commissioner. Does that mean no uniform or badge?"

"I can show you my badge. I save the uniform for special occasions. Here's the badge see?"

Damian crawled forward to look. "Did you know a hundred years ago you would have been called a sheriff? Some states still have sheriffs instead of commissioners. I used to think all police were called sheriffs in the western states but the term comes from England. A Shire Reeve was a crown appointed official responsible for keeping the peace in a shire or county. The term was latter contracted into sheriff like the Sheriff of Nottingham in the tales of Robin Hood but he was a bad guy. I like Robin Hood. Damian crawled out from under the table and climbed up on a chair calling out "WELCOME TO SHERWOOD!" He went to flip off the chair but Babs anticipating him pulled him into her lap instead. Damian giggled.

Barbara turned his face to her, "No more acrobatics!" she scolded.

Damian just grinned a cheeky monkey grin up at her and shrugged.

"Birds gotta fly, Fish gotta swim!" sang Damian off tune.

Babs smiled and responded in better tune, "Can't help loving that man of mine. You're a little rascal Dami."

Alfred and Jim struggled to get a car seat installed in the cruiser.

Babs and Dick took the opportunity to talk privately for a few moments.

"School was never the same after you were gone. It was like dragging myself to a job I hated. Too many memories."

"I don't have enough memories. All my special people, I'm scared I'll say or do something and it'll be all wrong because of something important I've forgotten."

"Secret handshake on making new amazing memories."

"Umm.."

"It was a joke Dami. We don't have a secret handshake," reassured Barb. "I just glad your back squirt."

Damian grinned a little then announced. "Let's make a secret handshake. Fist bump first then..."

They finally left the hospital at 9 pm, no one had eaten dinner and Bruce Wayne kept texting wondering where his son was.

'Jumping bean banged up the splint one time too many. Arm needed new x-rays. 1.5 hrs wait. Reset arm 3 hrs wait. They put him right out, procedure took about 15 mins. Recovery 45 mins. Cast care talk, sling fitting, pharmacy visit for pain meds, plus parking validation line up another 30 min. Stopping for dinner, everyone famished.'

Bruce frowned at his phone. It was 10:30 when they pulled back in the driveway. Bruce came out to meet them, not that he'd been hovering or anything. Dick/Damian was fast asleep in the back seat of the cruiser holding a new dump truck. He had what looked like chocolate ice cream in his hair and all down his front.

"Sorry Bruce. We couldn't get him the waterproof cast. There was too much swelling. In two weeks they want to recast it in a short arm cast but they thought it needed the extra support of the long arm cast for right now when he couldn't even handle a day without messing it up in a short splint. You can probably get the waterproof one then," Barb grinned.

"He needs a bath now," protested Bruce gingerly lifting his son out of the car careful of the cast. Damian slept on. Eww, he was sticky.

"I plead grandparents rights. Feed'em sugar. Spoil'em rotten. Get'em dirty. Send'em home," Jim declared wiggling his moustache and chortling jovially. Jim unhooked the car seat and sat it in the grass beside the car. He put the new dump truck next to it along with a folder of paperwork from the hospital. He gently ruffled Damian's hair then hopped back in the police cruiser and pulled away. Barb waved back at Bruce.

They're punishing me, thought Bruce glaring a little.

 _Decade rule: Never date outside your decade. We used to argue about the interpretation of this one in university. Did it mean you had five years on either side of your age to work with or ten? We finally agreed that under fifty you had a decade to work with half above your age half below. Over fifty you had a decade on either side of your age. Yeah... university conversations. Sleep deprivation makes the mind linger on some rather odd and pointless things._

 _Note: If there was someone you really wanted to see Robin interact with mention it. I am considering a short story regarding Jason that would be posted separately probably under YJ I can probably incorporate things into the new story. I don't want to get carried away with Appendices._

 _Is Jim really as dense as he sometimes seems? The man didn't get to be police commissioner by being stupid but the cop that investigates his own family tends to loose something precious. In real life, broken marriages rates in police families is unfortunately high._


End file.
